bananapancakes
- Date posted
- 3y
someone respond
with rocd, if i break up with my boyfriend would it happen in the next relationship ? has anybody actually experienced what happens after you break up?
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 3y
Most likely. OCD attacks the things you care about the most.
Isss123Isss123
- Date posted
- 3y
Hey, I’ve had ocd in all my relationships. Particularly SO OCD / ROCD. I still have this now with my boyfriend who is lovely. I had a previous long relationship with a boyfriend who I really loved too but experienced ROCD, however when I broke up with him it wasn’t actually bad and I knew it was right. OCD doesn’t make sense and is so difficult to come to, but when we really feel that way and know things need to be ended it’s a completely different feeling! I’ve been reluctant to get into relationships because I’m waiting for the ROCD to start even tho it usually does after the first date 🤣 but we need to push through and try our best to fight it head on! This isn’t to say I don’t still struggle I really really do but breaking up with your boyfriend isn’t the answer it’s just pushing OCDs influence! ❤️
bananapancakes bananapancakes
- Date posted
- 3y
if i really wanted to break up with him would i cry every time we talk about it and feel so anxious about it? like i get in this panicked mode
bananapancakes bananapancakes
- Date posted
- 3y
i’m just trying to figure out if it’s my ocd or my real thoughts. he’s my best friend and i love him and a month ago i saw myself marrying him and now i wake up every morning anxious
tulipomaniatulipomania
- Date posted
- 3y
Hey yes I broke up with my boyfriend 1.5 years ago and definitely struggled through it. I asked myself a million times if I was doing the “right” thing. In the end, you’ll never know, but when I looked at the facts (I made an extensive list (lol probably a compulsion)), I knew it was a choice that made sense for me. Focus on facts not feelings and you will be okay:) I am a way more grounded and happy person now thst im without him!
bananapancakes bananapancakes
- Date posted
- 3y
was he a bad boyfriend? my boyfriend would have no reasons to break up except for a feeling in my anxiety. or something stupid like is his nose too big
tulipomaniatulipomania
- Date posted
- 3y
@bananapancakes Ohhh then that’s totally different, I didn’t understand that was your situation! He wasn’t like HORRIBLE or anything, but I realized I didn’t love him, enjoy being around him, and he was stifling my growth. He was passive and didn’t act on his words. So yeah, he was in that “bad” category. It took me a while to realize all this stuff because I convinced myself it wasn’t a big deal! But then I realized it did matter and I had to end it to get better. So my OCD kind of did the opposite, it told me to get back together with him even though the facts said it wasn’t good and even my feelings said it wasn’t good either! But that is NOT the same as just because his butt was big or he didn’t shave as much as I wanted him to. Those are things OCD is trying to get you with and give you anxiety about! Not the same as actually feeling or knowing the facts and not being able to go through with it because of fear! Don’t listen to those voices of anxiety and fear if that’s all they are!
Isss123Isss123
- Date posted
- 3y
Honestly I’m exactly the same I get urges to break up with him all the time. I still find ocd soooo difficult to navigate I deal with thinking I’m a lesbian, leading him on, wasting his time etc every day. But I am navigating it, It sounds like you’re in an OCD spike please don’t try and figure out where these thoughts come from and just try to sit with them. This is the only way it’ll pass. Maybe write them down face them see them for what they are!
bananapancakes bananapancakes
- Date posted
- 3y
i totally get you. i’ve have the same thing. do you think it would be the bad choice to break up with him?
Isss123Isss123
- Date posted
- 3y
@bananapancakes Personally yea, I think that’s letting OCD win. For me, my boyfriend is the best person so he’s worth dealing with OCD for, it’ll only happen in the next relationship you get into (probably). At the same time it’s entirely up to you. If he is worth it then deffo keep going, but speak to him about it if you haven’t already. I showed my boyfriend this site and sent him some resources because OCD is so hard to understand if you don’t have it! If you would rather focus on yourself that’s totally ok too, but don’t react with impulse! I get thoughts that life would be easier without a boyfriend but right now I’ve made the decision to try and be present and appreciate the love I receive and TRY my best to give back x
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rjahastings
- Date posted
- 24w
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I’m having what I think is my first ROCD full episode. I’ve had doubting thoughts the entirety of my relationship. But in the last couple of days have been overwhelmed with and debilitated by anxiety and the feeling that I need to break up with my boyfriend. I don’t know if I have OCD officially but talking to therapists it seems that it is likely and I’m going to an OCD specialist next week to talk through my feelings but I feel completely helpless and hopeless at the moment and riddled with anxiety. I’m in a long distance relationship. I seem to have a waves throughout the day when I want to communicate with my boyfriend and tell him I love him etc. but the other 80% of my day is filled with anxiety and dread that I’m going to have to break up with him. I just want the anxiety to go away and to know if my thoughts are real thoughts or OCD thoughts. My biggest fear is that this isn’t an OCD episode and I do need to break up with him. I’m seeing him this weekend and I’m filled with dread about feeling disconnected and anxious and not in love.
bmaria
- Date posted
- 23w
Rocd ??
Please help. Been with my boyfriend for 15 months. 6 months into our official relationship I found out he kissed someone 1 week before he asked out officially. He told me he loved me at that time and I felt we were exclusive. He apparently did not . He also agreed he would not watch porn and lied once about it. I also have been spinning about the types of women he thinks are attractive and I find disgusting so I sent him pictures for months hoping he would say it looks gross but he didn’t and it killed me. Throughout the relationship I have been spinning about these issues really hard and it damaged my trust for him but I know he’s an amazing great guy I just feel very uneasy. It has been 1 year of me spinning about these issues and other little ones constantly texting him everyday and my friends about them to try to figure things out but I am unhappy . 4 months ago I had a severe breakdown and since I am severely depressed and anxious every day all day with thoughts of is this a wrong relationship , comparing him to other men, wondering if I would be happier with someone else. I have been seeing a therapist seeing a therapist one thinks I have rocd and a psychologist doesn’t . Nothing is helping me and I’m on Zoloft . I broke up with him a month ago and I’m still spinning in circles if I made the right decision or if I left over rocd and overblowing the issues that bothered me . Someone please tell me if you think this is rocd (edited)
user36373738
- Date posted
- 11w
Has anyone ever felt like this I’m freaking out
I have had ocd in my relationship for a while now. When I originally met him it was like this insane spiritual soulmate feeling and we just clicked instantly and he never judged me. I’m scared cause when I picture breaking up with my boyfriend I see myself being ok and being sad but moving on which I never was able to see before doesn’t this mean that this is what would happen or I don’t know till it happens? I still can’t imagine what life would be like without him but I just feel like I have lost feelings that I never wanted to lose. plus that’s also when I just picture knowing how people move on and how I’d just have to move on without letting myself picture processing the losses of all. I’m just really scared cause I used to think of wanting other things in someone else and what it would be like but I just thought how nice it would be to have it and not actually meaning it bc every time I thought about it I got upset and now it feels diff. He knows I have ocd but I never explained the ROCD because I thought it would have offended him so every time I went through a flare up I never told and acted like I was fine and it kept happening and OCD kept getting worse and worse. Maybe that’s part of the issue cause I haven’t been feeling like myself. But this is a feeling I never wanted to feel ever with him. I have gone through the feeling of numb but not like this. And he has a lot of positives but I can only see him overall as negatives and I’ve been told that’s ocd but it’s affecting how I feel. And yes there are legit actual things in the relationship that upset me but ocd has been affecting the way I look at him also. I keep being told my judgment is being impaired but this time it rly feels like not. And I’m Scared why don’t memories and things affect me like it used to doesn’t that mean I want this. Has anyone experienced this or is this the end 😭
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