ROCD? RELIGIOUS OCD? In denial?

After having a religious conversation with my mom I’m feeling quite triggered. She means well, it’s just I’ve avoided going to church ever since getting serious with my bf because every time I go I get this pit in my stomach and this horrible feeling that God is telling me to leave my relationship. But I don’t want to leave my relationship. So I can’t go to church, read the Bible or anything because it triggers this intense reaction and I end up believing I have to leave even though I love my boyfriend and really don’t want to. is anyone else struggling with this? And at the same time, I have so much guilt and feel so scared that I’m going to die because I haven’t been living a Catholic lifestyle and am afraid to die and go to hell. I don’t know but I’m so sad and lost:(

Username: JR2JR2

Date posted: 1y ago

I am a Christian and your thoughts definitely sound like ocd! You can’t simply trust your conscience or “gut feeling” when you have ocd! Comments like the one above keep people stuck in bondage to their anxiety, I’ve definitely been through it before. Felt like I had to break up with my then-girlfriend because she wasn’t Catholic, it was debilitating and felt like God was putting pressure on me, but I worked through it and didn’t give up. Spoiler alert, fast forward and we’ve been happily married for over 2 years! Christianity and science-based psychology can both be true at the same time!

Username: Hockey123Hockey123

Date posted: 1y ago

@JR2 Also, the gospel is what frees people from bondage. I would really consider what you just said. All I did was share the good news of Christ, the opposite of bondage. If she has genuine conviction that her behavior is against what the word of God says she should listen!

Username: JR2JR2

Date posted: 1y ago

@Hockey123 True, but the gospel does not contradict or overrule evidence-based and clinically proven science either!

Username: Hockey123Hockey123

Date posted: 1y ago

You are assuming a lot about her situation here ^ This man may not be healthy for her to be with. If she isn’t prioritizing her relationship with Jesus then that always takes first step. If he isn’t, then it may not be time to be dating.

Username: Beth172Beth172

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

@Hockey123 I would say you are also assuming a lot…my boyfriend is Catholic and a great man. This also happens with every guy I date so I recognize a pattern…thank you for your feedback but this is why it’s distressing for me. I really hope God would not put this much anxiety and fear into me. But instead lead me in peace. There have been a few moments of clarity where I felt God was leading me in this relationship. However I feel more anxiety whenever I go to church and end up having to leave due to anxiety attacks. I should have provided more info to start, I appreciate everyone’s support.

Username: JR2JR2

Date posted: 1y ago

Was meant more as a general statement than an assumption of her specific situation (which only her and God knows). Beth, I truly believe that if God wants you to break up, He will show you clear red flags with him or use other external factors/circumstances to show you. Don’t trust feelings alone, they aren’t facts!!

Username: peridot31peridot31

Date posted: 1y ago

Maybe going to church with your boyfriend (if you haven’t already) could be helpful. He’d be right there with you. Writing out why your boyfriend is important to you and why going to church is important to you could be helpful too. OCD tends to target the things we love/believe in, so writing out what you feel might help give you clarity about what you’re feeling in general and remind you why these things are positive in your life.

Username: Hockey123Hockey123

Date posted: 1y ago

Hello Beth, Thank you for sharing this, I am sorry to hear that you are feeling these things, it sounds very tiring and confusing. I would not call this OCD, I would say that your conscience is making you aware of some frightening realities. That death is coming for us all, that there will be a judgement day before God, and that without God’s help and grace, we all will be guilty before Him because we have fallen short…it is a rightfully fearful thing to be standing before the God who created all things and be guilty. Beth, I would listen to your conscience and use it as an indicator from God to consider your life and what is truly important.  Here is the good news: although we all are rightfully guilty of rebelling against God, He sent His son, Jesus, who lived a perfect, guiltless life, and died on the cross to remove our guilt and penalty of hell. No one is saved by their good works or good life, but as a gift from God because of His love for us. IT IS BY GRACE THROUGH FAITH THAT WE ARE SAVED, not by works so that no one can boast (Ephesians 2:8).  So the question for you to ask yourself is: do I truly have faith and believe in Jesus? Do I trust He is who He says He is, do I believe that He died for my sins to save me from death and hell? If you can answer HONESTLY yes to these questions, then you are saved and do not have to fear death and hell at all! God will rescue you from your suffering and bring you safely to heaven! We are saved by faith not our good lives (this is the good news of the gospel). Come back to your first love of Jesus. He does not want to rob you of joy in this life. We all will suffer, life is hard, but there is nothing truly good and lasting apart from Jesus. Everything on this earth will fade away but He will not. He is ready and willing to forgive you and loves you so much, don’t hide from His call to you! I have to add this though, and you may not like it: He will call you away from your sin, and you will have to give it up (we will continue to fail as followers of Him, but He wants us to be holy as He is holy, and that is where true life is found, we have to trust that.)  Thank you again for sharing this very vulnerable message with us! I care about you!

Username: foreverhatin...

Date posted: 5y ago

Anyone here a Christian and dealing with ROCD? I’m in a really great relationship with my boyfriend who is a Christian like myself. We both have our own solid relationship with God. However, every time I pray specifically about my relationship (and have for 4 years) I feel like God gives me affirmations or feelings soon after that conclude with my boyfriend just not being the person God has for me and I know God loves me and wants the best for me no matter what. Every time I pray about this, the ROCD comes in, like, “God has more for you”, “God has someone better for you”, “Am I disobeying and disappointing God if I stay in this relationship?” “Am I missing out on someone more fulfilling that God may have for me?” You get the point. After that part of the process, I beat myself up in guilt both for my boyfriend and thinking that I’m not listening to what God wants for me and I’m just holding onto something that’s good but I could have better. Then I just stop praying about that question and feel like I avoid God. And lastly, inevitably, I feel numb around my boyfriend because I’m exhausted from the whole process and I live in a feeling of settlement even though I do love him. My boyfriend believes that God has put me in his life and that God has grown him so much in part for me and because of our relationship. He is amazing, and I agree slightly, but that just leads me to more questions. Why don’t I feel that was too or why don’t I feel love for him the way I should If God out us together? Sorry if this triggers anyone. I have just been dealing with this for 4 years and have never actually typed it out this way. Any comments, advice or anything is welcome

Relationship OCD

Username: ashxfire19

Date posted: 2y ago

Is this ROCD?

Hi all, I just joined this app today after finding its recommendation on reddit so bear with me. The past three weeks of my life has been a living hell. Out of nowhere, I started obsessing about if I need to leave my partner. So let me just say, I love my partner so much, we’ve been together for 1.5 years. The thoughts about leaving him are eating me up and pulling me apart. For three weeks straight now from the second I wake up to the second I fall asleep, all I can think about is how I feel like I have to break up with my boyfriend even though I don’t want to. Nothings changed in our relationship but these thoughts have sent me into a spiral. I’ll spend hours reading articles about staying together and breaking up, having multiple crying meltdowns a day about the thought of losing him and that I don’t love him anymore, and feel like I can’t make this anxiety go away unless we break up (AND I DONT WANT TO AT ALL.) This has given my physical symptoms of nausea, chest ache, stomach issues, and mental symptoms of a pit in my stomach, constant feeling of dread, obsessive thoughts that I can’t stop thinking, and the guilt is unimaginable. I love him and I can’t imagine being with someone else. I don’t know what to do anymore. Is this ROCD or am I a bad partner?

Relationship OCD

Username: JesusSaves424

Date posted: 1y ago

Anxiety is bad today

I love my boyfriend so much. I am so afraid to get married though because of my OCD. A year ago I was fine and excited to eventually get married, but now it seems super nerve-wracking, and impossible, to me. I am a Christian and I have struggled with a lot of sexual sin in the past, before me and him started dating, but it eats me alive and I feel like if we do get married I have to confess all of it to him and that if I don’t I’m being dishonest and it’s horrifying. I know that nothing I ever struggled with was really that bad, I’m not going to get into that but he pretty much already knows the worst of it, but even when I have opened up to him I just feel like it’s not enough. My intrusive thoughts tell me that if I don’t tell him *everything* I’ve ever struggled with that I’m terrible, dishonest, a bad person, a hypocrite, a liar, that one day things will completely implode, that I’m destroying our relationship even though it’s completely healthy and he’s SO good to me, etc. I hate feeling this way. I want to marry this man, but it has become so terrifying to me. I feel like I absolutely do not deserve him and that I’m too awful and damaged for him. Me and him are long-distance and I’m even scared to meet him, to kiss him, etc. because I’m terrified of these fears coming up when I do. When I picture myself in 5-10 years being potentially married with kids, that thought in itself doesn’t give me anxiety, and in the grand scheme of things I can picture myself moving on from this anxiety, but at the same time in the present moment I feel like I’ll never move past this. I think this may be a form of ROCD and/or scrupulosity. I hate it I hate it I hate it. Does anybody else feel this way? Any other Christians who maybe relate?

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