Idk what to do anymore I’m literally stuck I mean today I went out saw a lot of girl got close to them nothing happened I was ok but I my attraction for boys is gone fuck nooo help plzzz

So you know how NOT wanting to be attracted to girls made it seem impossible not to be? Well, WANTING to be attracted to boys can sometimes have the opposite effect: it shuts everything down. Attraction generally doesn’t work like: “hey I want to be aroused by this; okay go!” The more you try to will a thought/feeling (just like the more you try to suppress a thought/feeling) the more impossible it is. Try this trick: embrace the the thoughts that say you won’t be attracted to boys. In fact, make a game of it. Go out and look and ogle and flirt and tease and tell yourself “ I’m not going to feel anything! Nope! Not me! Just try me, boys. Hit me with your best shot.” When you stop focusing so much on making it happen, and stop expecting it, it can actually start to happen naturally again.

What should we do

To your guys questions: - I was attracted to men before, but I was not totally as in tune with my sexuality and sexual needs as I became once I truly let go and accepted myself. I’d had only male partners, 2 long term relationships, at that point. - My process took like 5 or 6 months once I started facing things. Denial periods before that where I didn’t know how to deal with the thoughts and pushed them away was about a year. - I am very supportive of LGBT people and their rights, so I wasn’t scared of being attracted to women, I was afraid of not knowing myself or knowing how to be true to myself more than anything. And I was afraid my prior relationships were some kind of lie or delusion. That was the scariest part. - Also, before OCD I remember feeling fairly open to there one day being a girl I liked. And I considered myself somewhat fluid/bi.

Omg thanks I’ll try it

I’d love to hear your story because you seem to have a successful go at taking this thing down. If you don’t mind, I feel as if it’d give me hope and direction. @ pureolife

Me?

Oh ok no srry

no it’s fine, id love to see how you’re doing also?

I recovered from SOOCD a few years back. I’ve written about it on other posts, but there’s so many on here it would probably be hard to find them now. How I recovered may be too extreme for some sufferers. Please don’t take my story as a sign that you have to follow the same path. Also don’t take it as reassurance, obviously, that you’ll have the same reaction. My story with SOOCD: I found that accepting the thoughts as true to be what helped me eventually see they weren’t. I let myself want women as much as I could, in fact, I sought the thoughts/feelings/urges out. I checked women out, imagined being with them and what things I wanted, and searched for crushes. I also let myself feel repulsed by men. I allowed myself to be disinterested in them entirely. Even laughing at how immensely unattractive they “truly were.” After a few months, the unstoppable and immediate thoughts/urges about women just weren’t so urgent anymore. Women started to seem more like, well, people again. Then I became completely enthralled by a new guy at work. Physically, I felt a pulse between us. More than I’d ever felt with anyone, guy or girl or whatever. We started hooking up and having some of the best and most physically fulfilling sex I’d ever had. My body wanted every part of his masculine body. And I felt it in such a real, genuine, and present way (because I wasn’t seeking it out or forcing it) that I knew I did still like men, maybe more so than before OCD hah. I had a few relapses that would last a day or two at a time (once that initial passionate spark started to — very naturally — wane a little), but with continued therapy. I eventually made peace with all my sexual thoughts and urges (and lack there of), and they felt more genuine and real than ever. Nothing felt blocked or wrong or “not me.” Looking back, it was a pretty intense form of ERP to embark on. And I still had some work to do in being okay with uncertainty even after I had crystal clear evidence that I could, in fact, be super attracted to men. That final step of accepting uncertainty and risk whole heartedly is what I think drove my recovery.

What an inspiring u r❤️ this makes me so happy and it gives me hope

Inspiration*

But I just have a question like I’m just curious lol, were u super attracted to men before ocd

wow I’m proud of you:) how long did your process take? And did you ever have the fear of “what if I end up actually liking females if I accept the thought” when you tried to accept the thoughts? This is giving me hope :-)