falling behind in school

it's second semester of my second year of college and i'm already skipping classes like crazy. it's so bad because a lot of my teachers this year do not take attendance, which just makes me not want to go at all. but i feel even if they did i wouldn't go this semester because i've just been so a mess. i also haven't been doing any of my coursework so right now i'm just nervous. my parents said i better do good this semester because i have a scholarship as well and will lose it if my GPA is below 3. but i just feel like because of me i have bigger things right now to worry about other than school but my family wouldn't understand how bad it is right now. i tell them but i cannot talk about it with them in a way they will understand. plus i do not discuss the content of my intrusive thoughts that i have with anybody at all because i'm just so terrified of myself and hate myself right now

Username: Watermelon🍉Watermelon🍉

Date posted: 1y ago

I relate to you a lot. It’s also my second year second semester of college and I am also falling behind. My health is worsening making my anxiety and health OCD worse. It’s hard to look for medical help since it’s so expensive and barely anyone accepts my insurance. I just keep getting intrusive thoughts about my health and I just worry and cry constantly. I also have a scholarship in which I worry about losing. I honestly don’t know what to do, I feel hopeless. I just want to let you know that you are not alone, and even if we are suffering through different subtypes, I understand the college struggles. I hope you are able to find the help you need.

Username: trainwrecktrainwreck

Date posted: 1y ago

hello i am sorry that you are currently going through this. i hope that you can find the help that you need as well and i am wishing all the best for you. really hoping that you find someone soon that accepts your insurance as well <3

Username: Watermelon🍉Watermelon🍉

Date posted: 1y ago

@trainwreck Thank you! I also hope you can find the help you need too!!!

Username: Jeffrey Jeffrey

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

I am so sorry that you are having a difficult time right now. Ocd can be very overwhelming and debilitating. I would highly encourage you to seek help from the counseling services at your school. I would also add that intrusive thoughts are just that and do not mean anything. With ocd our brains are getting a false message that any intrusive thought is an emergency that needs to be dealt with right away. Here is the thing - everyone has intrusive thoughts - those of us with ocd have a messaging system that is telling there is an emergency where there is none. Those without ocd dismiss these thoughts as strange and move on. We need to do extra steps to learn to manage ocd. I am not sure if you are able to set up erp therapy with NOCD but there are also a lot of YouTube videos that can help you better understand ocd and how the ocd brain works. I hope this helps.

Username: GregJGregJ

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Hi, so sorry you are dealing with this. Does your school offer counseling services? Try to set a scheduled time each day every day that’s devoted to school work no matter what. This time is specifically to focus on school and you’ll worry (try to) about ocd later. Just let the thoughts come in and let them say whatever they want. Thoughts do not equal facts.

Username: crarayolacrarayola

Date posted: 1y ago

I’m really sorry you’re going through this. I can relate to this so much, you’re not alone! Recently I had to drop/ take a gap semester for my second term because my ocd and anxiety were so bad and the medicine I was taking for them made me feel like a zombie. I’m trying to find the help I need right now though. Just know that you’re not alone in your journey. You cannot control your intrusive thoughts and they don’t make you a bad person. Having school while battling ocd is so challenging so please go easy on yourself. I hope you can find the help you need and potentially a therapist. You got this, I believe in you! <3

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 4y ago

I don't know how to do it anymore. I have these constant urges to replay and revisit certain moments (where I think I hurt someone) and analyse them. I also want to confess to everyone I know... about everything. All I feel at the moment is disgust which has been growing more and more for the past weeks as I've been constantly feeding on tremendous levels of shame and disgust. I wonder how I could ever act on an urge and hurt my brother (even I never would intentionally because I love him more than my life, and because I don't want to be a person that causes pain to anyone in any way or shape). I wonder how I got here. It all started with thoughts. But it all ended in a huge, huge disaster with me as a monster in the centre of it. I'm really tired. I'm also scared because I'm convinced I will fail ALL my exams, therefore I will not be able to complete my second year at uni. Everything is getting worse and worse, and I barely have any energy left. I know I sound dramatic, which I apologise for, but I honestly feel like this is the end for me.

POCD

Username: M1ndoverMatt3r

Date posted: 3y ago

To the ones in college, has OCD put a huge impact on our school work. Honestly I’ve spent more time thinking than actually doing assignments this year... it’s eating me up because now I feel like I’m behind and a disappointment

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 3y ago

I screwed up so bad. I’m so behind on these papers I need to do for my college finals. My parents hate me, I hear the disgust and resentment in their voices. They know what a bad person I am. At my age they were actually responsible and self-reliant, they worked hard and functioned on their own as adults. I’m such a child still. I’m such a lazy, selfish, terrible person. And honestly my three siblings are just like me. My parents really really don’t deserve us. I will not be able to take care of my parents when they are old. Why did I let this happen? I messed it up so badly. I hate myself and I am a terrible person. I am not suicidal at all, and have been very firmly not suicidal for years; but I am only not suicidal because it would devastate and destroy the lives and happiness forever of my parents, my three siblings, and probably my extended family also. Even though they probably hate and resent me. Because even then, they would still be disgusted and horrified at what a monstrous selfish person I would be to kill myself, and they would always be scared and hateful that one day someone else they know might also turn out to be a really horrible person. I wish there was some way out of this, some way to escape this horrible feeling and dread. But there isn’t. It feels so bad, I hate the feelings of disappointing people so much. I hate it so much. It’s a torturous feeling that makes life really painful. Although the feeling isn’t nearly as horribly intense as when I was in high school and felt it really really badly all the time. So I guess I’ll get through this current bad situation. But I really did a terrible job, and it’s all my fault. I’m such a terrible person. And they will all hate me, forever. And they should. Every interaction with my parents for the rest of my life will be colored by their disgust of me. That muted and cold voice, and talking like they want nothing to do with me. Once I screw up these college finals I will have made them feel bad. They will feel sad and miserable because they will be so disappointed in their kid(s).

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

falling behind in school

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community