3rd post - logic is difficult for me

I have a question My OCD has felt almost invisible the past few weeks and now that is starting to stress me out a lot. Right now I am at a point in my treatement where I was asked if I would like to take medication. I told my therapist this week that I would like to try the medication based on how miserable I feel in during OCD flare ups. But now my brain always tells me that I only go throught this treatement etc. to seek attention and that I am just dramatic and should be ashamed of myself for wanting to take this medication. So now I am doubting if I should take the medication or not. Any advice?

Medication for OCD? Hello all, 19 male here, this seems like a cool community that isn’t nearly as triggering as reddit. I have pretty severe bouts of existential thinking or fear of going crazy ( psychosis ) after some pretty heavy mushroom trips a few years ago, I know logically I should be fine but I do know what it’s like to lose it and it’s scary. Currently I deal with relationship focused OCD, it’s all day from before I even open my eyes. I want things to work out with my girlfriend badly. Also I can come close to a panic attack sometimes which perpetuates everything. Anyway, I mention the fear of going crazy because the way my anxiety/derealization makes me feel is that I’m not mentally stable cause I feel out of it or unreal. I saw that a lot of anxiety and depression medication can cause psychosis and I feel like I could use some help in getting ahead of my OCD because the compulsions are had not to give into when I’m in such distress/not knowing. Plus overall I just feel like I have no idea how I feel about close to anything. Anyone relate about that ?

When I talk about how terrible I used to be to my girlfriend it makes me feel like I’m gonna do it again which I don’t wanna do and it scares me and then I get intrusive thoughts and feelings about it doing it but I don’t want to, weird I know.