Demons?

this is a theme I've dealt with for years, and I'd encourage you to be cautious here. regardless of beliefs (I'm personally christian), the human mind is a very powerful thing. it's important to treat thoughts like that like all other OCD thoughts - by allowing yourself to have them and not feed them. I thought I had been possessed when I was a kid, but now, regardless of if that happened for real or not, I see how big of a hand my OCD had in it. I'm in a much better place now, but I still have difficult days where my mind obsesses over demons/possession. Remember, you are stronger than you know, and although it's counterintuitive, the way to beat OCD is by saying "maybe, maybe not" to your thoughts.

I mean no disrespect, but I have to caution you on trying to reason on the basis of feelings. This is a cognitive distortion called emotional reasoning. Feelings aren't facts. As far as I can tell, we have no evidence that OCD is caused by occult practices. I believe those practices are unwise, but on separate grounds. You seem to know that God loves you, but are distraught because your feelings don't accord with that. I expect that if you do ERP, eventually you will feel better and your feelings will be more in accord with your knowledge.

I know I am forgiven but I feel very much I am being disciplined. I am struggling with this so much. I feel God’s spirit has left me and so pray for it to return, but then is this a compulsion? Ah, how to manage scripturally v psychologically is challenging as the advice is different.

I know God is loving and forgiving, but I feel he is so far away from me right now I am struggling not to despair.

I keep praying “Lord please help me or take me home to be with you.”

I have struggled with the fear that I am being disciplined and choosing to ignore God by getting help. But what I have remembered is that the gospel is all about us giving up control and allowing God to work. So I have to rest in that. I trust his will, will be done. So maybe it is punishment maybe not. I don’t have to sit and figure it out. God is not a God of confusion but of peace. Ocd sounds like confusion to me.

And anyone done rite of deliverance?

And whether or not this is an obsession or true is another thing I can’t know the answer to.

Thanks so much for your support. My ocd used to help with high standards. Now it is dear of harming family and fear of losing faith. I appreciate your encouragement. Is there a way we can stay in contact? Maybe via a private message from time to time? I am new to this app..

*fear

It is common to want to figure out where our OCD started or why we have it. But it's not helpful. Redirecting focus on moving towards recovery is a better use of your time and energy. If you're on a boat that sinking, it's better to move ashore to safety instead of standing on the boat trying to figure out what caused it to start sinking and drowning with it.