I’m so afraid I might be lesbian. I was very anxious at first but it started to calm down. I’m only 15 and I have a boyfriend I love. At least I think I do, I always chose to question everything and over analyze. I found out about hocd and it described everything I was feeling. I’d take test and read articles like “am I lesbian” but I have never fantasied a girl or wanted to be with a girl sexually or romantically. But what if I’m in denial? I do think girls are physically attractive but I never crushed on a girl. I have always crushed on boys. And liked being with them. I’m just so lost. My anxiety about it had calmed down. But the question is still there sometimes. Earlier today, I found a girl pretty and I got scared thinking that meant something. Then I read about women who have married men, but they know they’re lesbian. I’m scared that that’ll Happen to me. I don’t want to be lesbian. No disrespect. But I just want to be happy. I think I’ve suffered from ocd before. Tell me anyone if I’m wrong. But I used to have thoughts of that my boyfriend would murder me in the future because of theses videos that triggered me. It caused me so much pain and felt so real. That I eventually started to think I’d murder my mom and sister for no reason. I felt so helpless. But I got through it. I hope I get through this. Please any advice? Is this hocd?? Does anyone else feel this way?

Thank you it’s very helpful. These thoughts have just all felt so real. I appreciate the help.

It is definitely hocd. And your worries about killing your mum was harm ocd, and that your boyfriend would kill you was harm ocd. But remember that ocd will have you questioning everything and ocd will never let you relax with any decision you make, it will have you question even this comment that I am writing. Ocd will always win, you need to accept the thoughts as just thoughts, and live in the now as much as you can with these thoughts, hope this helped a bit xx

Ocd makes every thought feel extremely real, ocd is an illness and wouldn't be an illness if it was easy to cope with, sadly xx

my situation was exactly the same. literally,,,, the exact same. i would give you some advice but everything i would say has already been said!! just stay strong. ocd will try its best to trick you and twist every little thought into so many things that it is most definitely not. just breathe. you’ll get through this.

This is another intrusive thought like the others, I get them all the time. It feels so real but you need to remember it’s not. OCD will make you think it’s real and make you think you’re crazy, a murderer, a lesbian or whatever. We need to just accept they are thoughts and keep breathing ❤️

Hey! I’m 15 too! Holla to the ocd teens!! Haha. You’re definitely not alone and it’s definitely ocd. You’re describing it completely. I dealt with harm ocd as a child and I got over that too! You can totally get over this. I did! I’m in so much of a better place now. It’s taken damn hard work, but it’s worth it. I would recommend getting a therapist and to stop ruminating, checking, mentally reviewing, and get out of your head! Practice mediation. Look up some articles on actual denial. Accept the uncertainty that you could be! Live in the moment. Don’t review the past and don’t review what the future could be. You will be okay!

Thank you for the advice MissLovely. I appreciate it.

Thank you! It feels nice to know we aren’t alone, but I wish for no one to go through this. It’s such a pain. Stay strong aswell!