I don’t know what to do

So I have pocd so sometimes I have a hard time figuring out what’s acceptable and unacceptable, also sometimes I’m scared of others doing the things I fear. So today my husband and our kids went on a float with some of my family which was going good until I turned around and my husband had gone back to where my cousins and little brother were and I saw he was helping my 16 yr old (f) cousin tie her swim suit that had untied. Which made me uncomfortable especially while there’s people her age around that could have helped and her mom wasn’t that far away. Then like 5 minutes later they were holding onto each others paddle boards and she was holding onto his paddle all while he was holding it close all this time I’m trying to keep our kids close and together. My aunt, her mom was distracted trying to keep my grandparents in line since they aren’t use to kayaking so I don’t even know if she noticed to think anything of it. Then after I was clearly irritated my husband got away from her and was like what’s wrong to which I just said I’m okay. After he realized I wasn’t in the mood to speak with him my cousin came up to me and went on about how her swim suit came untied and why she couldn’t fix it and it just felt like damage control. And I want to clarify I’m not mad at her she’s a child but I’m infuriated that my idiot husband thinks all of that was ok and doesn’t try keep space between them. I don’t know what to do because I know I sometimes blow things out of proportion or I see things different because of ocd, so I don’t know if that was weird or if I’m not thinking right and ocds winning I just need help deciphering what I should do. I honestly just want to tell him to leave and to stay away from my family but I haven’t because I don’t know if it’s me being crazy or if it’s actually concerning. So can someone please help?

Username: Smsm3Smsm3

Date posted: 1y ago

Hey, as an actual 16 year old girl, I personally would never ask an older man to tie my swim top. Nor would I expect one to want to. However, it’s a weird situation. I mean… it’s possible there was a reason? I’d say maybe have a talk with him about it. I wouldn’t say immediately in the wrong for sure? But I do think it’s definitely worth talking to him.

Username: 2groovy4u2groovy4u

Date posted: 1y ago

I understand where you are coming from but I can also understand that your husband might have just been trying to help. I haven’t seen it from your perspective but don’t just fault to your judgement about it as well, try to keep an open mind and maybe yes chat with him about it. Because it also sounds like a bit of a boundary issue and not just pocd so it’s definitely worth having a chat about. But like I said try to keep an open mind about it and don’t try to narrow in on him as this creep, after all he could have just been trying to help. ❤️

Username: Anymous Anymous

Date posted: 1y ago

Yeah also as a 16 year old girl I would also never tell a grown man to tie my bathing suit espically my cousins husband if anything I would ask someone more my age or something but you should definitely talk to him about your boundaries because what someone might not find inappropriate you might think it is

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 1y ago

I would bring it up and see what his reasoning was. Maybe he was just being helpful I’m not sure. As someone with POCD this made me uncomfortable reading lol so I can see where your discomfort came from. I would just communicate how you feel

Username: Meepmeep Meepmeep

Date posted: 1y ago

I don’t even know where to begin with talking to him. I hear you guys with you would never ask an older man to help but o don’t know if that’s the case with her, just because she’s always fallowed him around like a lost puppy dog, the other thing I don’t understand is he always tells me she annoys him, so I don’t get why he even continued to sit with her after that. I know o need to talk with him but I also need time to calm down which is why I haven’t.

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 5y ago

Okay. I’m going to probably sound a little crazy. I have had ocd my entire life. Now it’s revolving around my spouse and him possibly doing something bad. Latest obsession and anxiety: I was at my mother in laws house helping her with something on her phone. I noticed that Snapchat was on her device and asked her if she had it. She said it was very weird. She doesn’t use that and didn’t download. My husband and kids were at her house a couple of weeks ago to watch a football game. The thoughts I’m having are that he downloaded it to her phone and used it while he was there. Can anyone help me sort this out? It’s causing me significant distress. Obviously he knows I’m thinking this and thinks it is ridiculous.

Relationship OCD

Username: OCDsucks111

Date posted: 4y ago

I need advice on something because I’m freaking out. Anxiety is sky high and I’m on the verge of a panic attack. I was taking my kids to get soMe ice cream and my 3-year old son was being super goofy and silly. He’s in a stage where bathroom humor (poop, pee, butt, pee pee) is just his favorite thing. He said, “Grandpa showed me his pee pee!”and he was laughing and giggling. My daughter is 6 and said, “No he didn’t!” I asked her again when we got home and again she said her brother was just being goofy and it never happened. I immediately spiked because sexual abuse of my kids is my nightmare. Add to that that my dad (their grandpa) is my best friend, one of my biggest supporters with my mental health and just a really decent man. This does not fit into who he is at all; he’s basically the opposite of a predator. I told my husband, who immediately said, “This sounds like your OCD acting up and playing on your biggest fears. This doesn’t fit your dad or his values,” I took my emergency anxiety meds and I’m trying to sit with it and let it go. Should I talk to my dad? Should I chalk this up to OCD trying to mess me up?

"Pure" OCD

Username: riiii

Date posted: 3y ago

Hello everyone this is my first time writing on here and I’m really scared to even say something because I have never had proper help with ocd or been diagnosed but I’ve been dealing with severe ocd since 2017 now. I just want to get better but it feels like there is no way out at times. My most common are sexual thoughts or pocd or ocd related to my family, sexual or harm. Yesterday my niece was at my house and I adore her to bits but over the past year I’ve become very distant with her and I don’t like hugging her or touching her or just being close to her. It makes my heart break because she is everything to me and I have to push her away when she comes to hug me. Yesterday I tried to get over it and play with her again so I hugged her and sat by her side with my head on her shoulder but a sudden urge came into my mind and it was so disgusting. I kept thinking I would touch her inappropriately or without her consent and that thoughts just took over my mind. This will sound so stupid but my thumb or fist was on her back and I had a thought that it was wrong to touch her so I pulled away but the thoughts came rushing back and I let my fist be placed in that same position again. I feel so disgusted I know it’s nothing and this sounds completely insane but I feel like I’ve done something disgusting and touched her in a inappropriate way and I havent been able to get over it because it feels like I let the thoughts win and they made me do it? What if it isn’t ocd? I’m feeling like I just can’t get through the night please tell me if real event ocd happens to you guys and how to deal with it? Is this ocd or am I just this disgusting person who did something to her? I keep replaying the moment in my head but all of it is fuzzy and I can rationalize it. I just feel disgusting.

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