Defeated. I am tired, I am stressed, and I just want peace. Nothing feels like it is going to get better. I am at a constant battle with myself. My brain and my heart/gut just don’t even speak at this point. I feel like I’m going crazy; it’s not normal to try and convince your brain it’s wrong. I am just tired..
I feel this so hard. I started dissociating a lot more because my brain cannot handle the stress. I'm in therapy now though we haven't started doing ERP yet. In the meantime I'm trying to use non engagement responses for my intrusive thoughts and limiting and delaying compulsions. I've also been paying attention to daily habits that keep my head above water and make them a non negotiable priority. For me those are: eating well and enough, daily walks especially longer night time walks alone, staying hydrated, exercise, journaling, time in the sun. Maybe these habits can help you out until you can start erp? Also what helps me is learning as much as I can about OCD and getting involved in the community (even if it's just following OCD people on YT and IG). I recommend Chrissie Hodges YouTube videos. She's saved multiple lives including mine with her content. A godsend. Hang in there 🩷
What are some phrases I can use to help my son, before, during or after having an intrusive thought and or complusion?
Please know you are definitely not alone! I always tell people that things will change- they never stay the same. There is so much hope. You can get better. Sometimes just knowing you are not alone can be the first step to recovering. Please know that there have been many people who have experienced similar things to what you are who have gone on to get treatment and to live life to the fullest, in spite of their condition. You can get to a place where your life doesn’t feel consumed by these intrusive thoughts and feelings. There is so much hope. ERP has changed so many individual's lives. Check out some of their journeys in recovery- https://www.treatmyocd.com/my-ocd-journey
I feel like I’ll never lead a normal life again with OCD, my thoughts have begun to be convince especially about POCD. I feel like so sad and down that this will be my life forever. I’ll never get to fall in love again without intrusive thoughts. I’ll never be worth falling in love with. I can never be intimate again. I’m just done, my life is over. I can’t even look at my nephew and niece anymore without the smile fading. It feels like I’m so nasty and then my brain convinces me this is how I feel. That there’s some part of me that is a p*do and that’s it. I’m a disgusting human being for that. I just feel hopeless
I can't live with OCD anymore. It's ruining my life. I feel like I'm being constantly bullied in my own mind all day everyday. I don't know if what I think and feel is ever real or normal or okay, what is me and what is the OCD thoughts. I don't know if any of my experiences are normal. I'm exhausted from picking apart every single conversation I ever have with anyone until I'm strung out by a vague and ambiguous feeling of guilt. I'm tired of feeling like I'm a bad person and feeling scared all the time and not knowing why and having my brain spin me out on an endless spiralling train of thoughts that never goes anywhere and just makes me feel disconnected from everything and everyone around me. I don't know what I feel and if what I feel is normal or if anything I am doing is real and actually me or if I'm 'losing my mind.' I don't even know if this makes any sense. I get into these states of mind where every thought in my head and everything I feel and perceive makes me question my own sanity. I don't know if anyone likes me because I have absolutely no concept of what I am actually like. I feel completely lost and confused CONSTANTLY.
just when I think i’m having a good weekend and I can forget about my struggles my brain tells me i’m not allowed to feel happy and that there’s always SOMETHING i need to be worrying about. so frustrating :(
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