OCD rant
Why isn’t the road to recovery a smooth one, it feels like 2 steps forward and 1 one backward, it’s confusing me and gives me this feeling of hopelessness when ever I backslide to that dark pit again
There’s no cure to OCD so I’m sure that you’ll backtrack and have feelings of defeat but, you aren’t alone. You can backslide and still press forward. Recognize your ruminations and allow yourself to feel that feeling and ask ask yourself of the POSITIVE possible outcomes of the situation. Disturb the train of thought. I’m telling everyone about this app that someone on NOCD recommended to me.. it’s called Unstuck. I KNOW for a FACT that it’ll give you a better outlook and help change your mindset way more than being trapped in your compulsions.
You can get rid of the neuropathways paved into your mind which is now ocd, you have to create new pathways and expand on them so they become easier to use over time. The ocd symptoms will go down with this. It's a pain in the butt to do but it's doable
Can't ***. You can reduce the size/ heal them though
Omg I have totally felt the same way in my recovery and it’s EXHAUSTING to be committed to doing the work and to feel like you should be making more progress than you are. I suck at being patient so I get it. Try to remind yourself that OCD has been in the driver’s seat for a long time, and the way your brain has learned to operate has been to protect you in the way it thought it needed to. But you don’t need it’s “help” anymore and it’s going to take time to unlearn and undo the web it’s created in your brain. Have trust that you will get there ❤️ it’s definitely a process but the work you’re doing will catch up with you in the best way I promise!
It’s so crazy how even though you have been through this a million times, when a new thought pops up or an old obsession resurfaces, it feels impossible to get through. You know the tools and you recognize the feelings, and yet somehow “this one” is different. It’s more serious, more disturbing, it’s a sign of your true desires, etc, etc. Taking the risk of uncertainty is not worth it “this time”because the consequences are too severe. Every time you start to make progress on an obsession or even just part of an obsession, you think you are finally getting the hang of it…and then ocd hits you back and it’s like all the confidence and progress you were starting to feel like you were developing gets blown away and in that moment you are back at the beginning. Ocd is truly diabolical and so smart. It causes so much suffering. I am so tired of making progress or even just maintaining my current obsessions just to get smacked in the face with something “different” and somehow “worse”. It is exhausting. One thing I never considered I would need to fight ocd and use erp was stamina. I really hope everyone out there struggling with ocd is doing ok. If you have ever felt like this, just know that I am in that same place.
A month ago I was feeling so good, i was im a recovery journey, i had some bad days but then i was able to see it as a good thing. Now for 2 weeks now im on a setback and its worse day by day, now i cant even escape from my mind, i was able to see through all of this, and now this is the complete inverse of that... I cant even go back to see what i did so i do the same again to feel better but my I keep thinking that i just think i kept getting better, i was blinded by the good feelings, actually i was still obsessive, and i cant do the same things again cause it will not help... i feel alot of shame cause how I was felt so good for weeks and see through ocd and now i believe everything my mind says and i react to every thought...thats why i think i wasnt even on a good path, then i wouldnt be here. Im tired of always go back to the starting point...
I’ve been doing really well the past few months. I’ve been consistent with ERP therapy and other exercises to help manage my OCD. However, something triggered my OCD to come back in full force last week and while I know that the journey to recovery isn’t linear, and I know that this is something I will always have to work on, it’s been very disheartening and it feels like all the progress I’ve made has been for nothing. It’s exhausting and I’m struggling with intrusive thoughts that I will never get better again. Anyone else relate?
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