Anonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
For those who have loved ones with OCD false/real
Should you let them share their ruminations and intrusive thoughts with you? How do you listen but not reassure them?
Chickens_FrogsChickens_Frogs
- Date posted
- 1y
I say just listen. Maybe just change topics without making it noticeable. That’s what I would hope people would do for me. People not listening to me though would not have got me off my thought loop. If it did then it would have just pushed me into depression side of my brain. That’s how I feel but I don’t pretend to be a professional.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@Chickens_Frogs Listening I can definitely do. I like your advice of changing topics but at this point the content of the intrusive thoughts is hard to ignore. They think it happened and I know it sounds too absurd but don’t want to affirm whether it happened or not
UH52UH52
- Date posted
- 1y
It’s indeed a very delicate balance, like being with them and offering a listening ear is undoubtedly the best thing to do, but since it’s OCD and there is a huge chance of reassurance seeking loop to get in. Then one of the best course of action is to listen to them and hear their worries, but at the same time tell them that it’s just OCD, you are safe and well, it’s just OCD messing up and it’s not at all their fault. So we can indeed stop answering their reassurance compulsions at the same time make them understand that there are people for them, and they are definitely not alone in their healing journey and are by no way singled out! Hope it helps!!
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@UH52 Thank you appreciate your advice here. By seeking out therapy, what do I hope my partner gets out of these therapy sessions? So far no tools or help provided by the nocd therapist
UH52UH52
- Date posted
- 1y
@Anonymous I totally get it, therapy while incredibly useful does take a lot of time and understanding to start being effective, and it’s often not a linear progress too. And regarding what we might get out of therapy, it completely depends on what is the exact issue we are facing, the severity, the therapist doing, the approach using and all, if it’s ERP, then it’s by gradually exposing to our feared cases and thus slowly making the situation less fearful in the long run, but if it is central CBT (ERP also comes under it) and all it’s changing our unhelpful thought patterns by setting more realistic and helpful patterns in its place. The speed of the therapy, the effectiveness and all is completely dependent on each case! But usually it will make us handle such issues in the long run much better, and make us live a better life despite OCD. Hope it clears somewhat!!
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alex_x504
- Date posted
- 18w
Hello, someone I care about has OCD.
Someone I care about has OCD, he often gets worried to answer certain things in fear that he might be wrong or gets anxious in times when certain conversations such as dealing with negative emotions come into play and in the event something goes wrong even though we deal with the issue it takes him a long time to put himself back together. Often times worried about his image, hyper focused on being a good person etc etc. I believe I’m doing my best but as someone who doesn’t struggle with OCD I cant fully comprehend him and i wish to learn more about it, not just read it off of google. Any advice would be appreciate it. -Thank you!
Lovemycats02
- Date posted
- 17w
About reassurance?
I’ve heard it’s not good to seek reassurance or give it because it lowers your tolerance to uncertainty. But how do I avoid seeking reassurance when my thoughts and doubts are so bad, I genuinely just don’t know anymore if I’m a bad person or if it’s just OCD? I know I’m supposed to sit with the uncertainty, but how can I do that when the uncertainty has me unable to trust my own brain? Especially when the OCD is real event and POCD? How can I not seek reassurance when I feel so alone and so abnormal and just don’t wanna feel that way anymore? In turn, I see so many people on here struggling so bad and my heart breaks for them. How can I give advice to towers without giving them reassurance and hurting them in the long run?
OutstandingC...
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 16w
What do you guys think?
I see a lot of posts and comments here along the lines of... "the thoughts/urges aren't you -- they're just OCD." Though this is often true and comforting, isn't this just a form of reassurance? The way to beat OCD is by accepting that the distressing thoughts MAY be true/real, a.k.a. "from you" or "not just OCD." By brushing distressing things off as "just OCD," you excuse the thoughts and therefore feel reassured. Obviously it is good to be aware of what OCD does to you and know when you're experiencing a spiral, but crediting all distressing thoughts to OCD is a way of finding certainty about them. What do you guys think of this? Am I right or wrong? This is just the way I think about it, but I see the "this is just OCD" thing so much on here and I often wonder if that is a form of reassurance.
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