- Date posted
- 1y ago
Help
I just see my boyfriend's flaws and I feel we have to break up because we are not compatible and I dont think it s rocd
I just see my boyfriend's flaws and I feel we have to break up because we are not compatible and I dont think it s rocd
You’re not alone- for me it comes in waves. One day or two days will be perfect- then I get stressed out and can’t control the negative barrage of “he’s doing this” “what if he did this” “we don’t mesh” etc.
@whit89 That’s where I’m at right now
I can relate. I also have a lot of trauma so I wonder if it’s from that? But I find my mind constantly ruminating over what we are, how comparable we are, if we’ll end up together. I have so much fear wondering what we are & if he’s “the one” I’m also autistic so my brain thinks very black or white & I find that he’s either all good or all bad - no in between. He is the most incredible person I’ve ever met so it’s exhausting feeling this way. Sometimes writing out a pros & cons list helps me.
i dont know if im lucid enough to state this, but my fear comes from the fact that its no longer intermittent for me. always doubt.
so i dont know if its rocd anymire
If they see your flaws and are still with you, what does that say to you?
do someone want to talk on telegram
I’ve been struggling with relationship OCD and differentiating between what is an intrusive thought and what is a real doubt. I was really happy with my partner then I got one aggressive thought that I didn’t love him and this spiralled into noticing all his flaws. I struggle being around him because I feel a huge sense of guilt that these thoughts even come into my head and I cannot figure out if this is my brain lying to me or this is how I feel. It’s really impacting a relationship that is so important to me.
i couldn't take this anymore. maybe i'll just let ocd win this time. it's too hard to not have a clear conscience everytime i'm with my bf cuz my mind is telling me i'm unfaithful and don't deserve to be happy. i feel like i'll never get better anymore. i already told myself many times to stop attracting attention from other people especially to people i'm having false attraction to. but i did it again yesterday, right after i smiled a little extra in front of that girl i might be attracted to i could feel the massive anxiety in my chest. already decided last week that i might be actually attracted to her so it's best to fully avoid her. i avoided her with the best i could, but we're in the same classroom and i saw her in my peripheral vision looking at us (my bf and i) whispered to myself not to make any mistake i'll regret, but then i felt like i lose control and laugh a little extra. i searched micro cheating and it says there "trying to impress someone you're attracted to" and now i want to break up with my bf. the guilt is too strong. i couldn't sleep at night.
Does Rocd make it nearly impossible to forgive your partner for anything. Whether it is big or small? My situation is so gray area where there’s something my bf did that I feel like I’m not okay with but he did this when we were first dating (not bf and gf yet). I ruminate all day about it bc I don’t want to lose him and see a future with him and I know he loves me so purely. But I also feel like I’m going against my morals here bc I do feel betrayed by what he did. I try to forgive him by diminishing my feelings and telling myself “he never did anything physical with a girl or went out with another girl while we were together” but still feel so hurt that he even messaged another girl while us dating. He’s given me an explanation and has proved how much I can trust him so I’m just completely stuck on whether I should forgive something I know I would’ve never done to him or leave him even though the only thing he’s done wrong was before us becoming official. I’ve broken up with him countless times over this situation bc I feel like I “can’t live with it” but then immediately when we break up I want him back and I kind of understand his explanation and reasoning. I don’t know what is ocd and what is my real intuition anymore. I genuinely think it’s both. Are any of you guys in the same boat?
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