kaysf
- Date posted
- 5y ago
TonyOCDTonyOCD
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I had that feeling too. And also in the past 11 years of having HOCD i've had a few thoughts that pass really quickly and they have given me this feeling or sensation that literally feels like "wait, did I just felt like I enjoyed, agreed or liked this thought"? and I have panick. They always happened really quick And scared the shit out of me. Even thoughts to kissing a friend. It has beeb like 10 years since that one and today I remember that and just think "no... hell no, how could I have doubted this".
kaysfkaysf
- Date posted
- 5y ago
yea i’ve had those exact thoughts. how did you get better?
kaysfkaysf
- Date posted
- 5y ago
yes. i used to have the thoughts so much that i just got used to them and they didn’t bother me. they were there and i hated that i had them but they didn’t gross me out, and that made me think i liked them for the longest time. this freaked me out so much. and especially now that i’m getting better and so the thoughts really don’t disgust me anymore, it kind of freaks me out bc that makes me think i like them and am just denying it. but that’s not the truth.
TonyOCDTonyOCD
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Well, it's harder it looks. Still today I have some thoughts that make me doubt and hurt. But most of this kind of thoughts I can let them pass without stressing. Unfortunately you will never get certainty that you're thought was false. But I do challenge it a bit. When I had the thought of kissing a friend, that at least for the span of a millisecond felt like "I enjoyed this", I would challenge it with things like: "I have never analyzed how "a thought feels for a brief second" to decide or know if I desire someone or not. It only happens with my unwanted thoughts. Most importantly, I identify that right at the moment you say "did this felt like I enjoyed it or liked it" you are adding meanings to your thoughts, HEAVY AND IMPORTANT MEANINGS". And this on itself distorts the experience of the thought. Maybe it was just a creative thought that you missinterpreted or in the worst and most scary scenario, it could have been a thought you had in your mind that maybe felt a bit "funny" for a second. Who knows, after so many thoughts and scenarios one comes up with... but asking yourself "did I liked it?" "Did I enjoyed it"? "Do I want it"? That's just fear speaking for you, and in reality it means even more: "Im turning gay, I'm changing", etc. So in short, I just let them pass and as anxiety goes down I can actually look at the person again and feel confident in saying "oh hell no, there'a not a chance here"...
minimjsminimjs
- Date posted
- 5y ago
YESSSSS LMAO i thought i was the only one who thought this
kaysfkaysf
- Date posted
- 5y ago
i’m seeing a common thing upon hocd sufferers. we all think we are the only ones that go through certain hocd things
minimjsminimjs
- Date posted
- 5y ago
@kaysf so true!! i went a couple years without even knowing that hocd existed. i just thought i was defective somehow. lol
LinaLina
- Date posted
- 5y ago
All the time! I have a question. Does it ever feel like you like your thoughts? This is something I really struggle with. If so, can you describe to me what that liking feeling is like for you? I just need to feel like I'm not alone and going crazy.
LinaLina
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yeah same thank you for responding :)
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y ago
YES!!! Yes!!!! I thought I was the only one!!!!! THANK GOD IM NOT ALONE!!!!
lisaclairelisaclaire
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I feel so much better ? It’s like your head wants to ruin any bit of happiness in your life and destroy any dream you’ve ever had
kaysfkaysf
- Date posted
- 5y ago
of course! i think that’s very common in hocd
kaysfkaysf
- Date posted
- 5y ago
so glad all of you can relate! i feel so much better knowing it’s not just me
Related posts
AaaAnonymous
- Date posted
- 24w ago
Soocd
Does anyone with so ocd get scared or feel like they r just going to suddenly realise they r gay. Like all of a sudden you’ll be like omg I’m gay and then I get scared like ong it’s happening to me Can any relate to this
Dead girl wa...
- Date posted
- 23w ago
I’m confused
Ok so I’m a 17 year old female, and I’ve always thought I was straight. But I just really want to know how you would know the difference between so-ocd and actually questioning your sexuality. I have nothing against the LGBTQ community (in fact I am very much a token straight friend, lol) but I saw a video about comp-het recently and it sort of felt like what I was experiencing. I don’t want to be gay, I want to be with men, I want to like men, I’ve always liked men, but now I’m questioning whether or not that’s real? Because people can be gay but not want to be right? I’m single and I always have been. I think women are gorgeous, but when I try to imagine actually having any sort of romantic or sexual relationship with a woman it feels wrong, at least most of the time it does? Sometimes I’m less sure, and I’ve never been particularly boy crazy. I’ve liked maybe 2 or 3 people in my life, (not to say I’ve never found other guys attractive, but it doesn’t seem to be as often as most people) I have no particular reason to be afraid of being gay, very supportive family, safe area ect, but I don’t want to be, does that mean this is ocd, I don’t know what’s going on every time I say I’m straight I feel like I’m lying, but that might just be because I think about it so much. The idea of being with a woman doesn’t feel like something I would want, but is that just because I don’t want to want it? People online say things with so much sureness, if you feel like this it means this. Ect.
allyocd
- Date posted
- 10w ago
can SO-OCD do this?
im having a unusually hard flare up for two months. ive never had it this bad before (ive had this on and off for many years - thank god not constantly.) lately, i keep having these images in my head and scenarios in my head of me "coming out" in the future and ending my relationship with my amazing fiance who i love dearly. he knows everything but i still feel like i am constantly lying to him, my family, and friends. i need to know that this is something the SO-OCD can do to you? the weird thing is, is that i have never been attracted to woman. i do admire their beauty and wish to LOOK like them or have a specific feature they have, but i dont have any urges to like be with them yet i am dealing with this really bad flare up. My brain keeps telling me that since i have never tried it, i would never know, and i am just getting really distressed from it. i just want to be happy again and it seems impossible. I am convinced i am only person that is using SO-OCD as an excuse. Any guidance or advice, or anything really, will help. i just feel alone and scared and sad all the time.
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