Hello, my name is Reef. I need help. I have a problem with toenail grooming since April 2017. I consulted a psychiatrist and was prescribed Ativan and Zoloft. The diagnosis was anxiety and OCD. Prior to April 2017, I was alright and normal. I would cut and file my toenails and move on to another task. I stopped the medication because of the side effects that made me sick. I am tormented by images of my toes and toenails non-stop which make me bend over to check them. It is exhausting and I cannot sleep well due to the non-stop nagging images. I consulted four podiatric surgeons to remove all my toenails so I did not have to cut and file them. I believe removal of my toenails would have resolved the problem. The podiatric surgeons declined my request. This condition is debilitating and affects my daily routine. I am existing, not living.

Hi all. This is my first time posting on this, and I’m a little concerned about it, but recently my OCD has reached some new levels that are getting pretty overwhelming. It would mean a whole lot to me if some of you would read this and offer me your two cents. Today I was at my girlfriends house for a Passover dinner and nuts were out for a snack. Something about me that’s important to know for this story is that I have an extremely sever Peanut allergy - life threatening. I carry two epi-pens on me at all times. Back to the story, although I am only allergic to peanuts and no tree nuts, these nuts that were placed out were assorted tree nuts, that were likely coated with peanut oil. I lost control. This was the most out of control I have felt in years. I watched the mother eat a nut then take a taste test of the chicken. I was convinced I was going to have a reaction. Later we sat down at the table, and I was in complete fear. The father offered me matzo, but I was too afraid to have anything he touched. I even ended up looking at my girlfriend, who is well aware of my condition, that I was going to end up in the hospital for sure. All I could think about from that moment on was a two-hour mental clock that’s end would signify I would no longer be in danger of going into anaphylactic shock. I had no control and was shaking all throughout the dinner. I truly had no clue what to do and felt completely overrun. Just one day before that, I had another freak-out. This one took place on a vacation, where I had to apply sunscreen to myself. I was absolutely terrified that I had gotten poison ivy from earlier in the day and that I was rubbing it all over myself, and would one day in the near future wake up with it all over me. I tried to voice these concerns to my mother, but I just couldn’t listen to her answer. No matter what she says I dismiss it because I believe she has no clue what she’s talking about, while I, on the other hand, am a self-proclaimed poison ivy “expert.” I know this is terribly long but, here’s what I’m getting into. This condition has been tearing me apart. I am constantly in a state of unrest and I feel that it is tearing down my relationship, even though my significant other is typically understanding. The worst part is, as much as I want to never have OCD again, I am completely afraid to break free from it’s shackles. I believe that my OCD has always given me significant intelligence, and recently had even let me see the world in ways that I could never have before. I have always said that it is the silent killer. OCD is the most subtle death to anyone. It has torn me apart and managed to make me feel dependent on it. As much as I find it horrible, I find it beautifully; and I don’t want to lose something that could potentially make me who I am.

Hi guys... I'm new here & not sure how this works but I could really use some help. I have the kind of OCD that hasn't let me eat or sleep in over a year now. I'm 8kgs under weight. I have not been able to function. I have nightmares & paranoia and sleep with all my lights on (if at all I manage to sleep). I'm always scared and struggle to breathe. I'm really restless & I have suicidal thoughts, sometimes. I also have anxiety disorder, depression & panic attacks. I don't know what to do. I want it to stop. Even if its for a few hours. Can anyone help me...? Please...?

Hi there my name is tahahussain and i am not in the state never have been but pliease can u help me So here the thing everyday i wake up i have to think of beautiful face and swallow my spit while thinking but most of the time faces of ugly people just pop out randomly and i have to do all over again so after that i have a specific time in that time i wash face but first i look at a beautiful face of a man while swallowing then i look at someone near by and swallow while thinking about their face and if i dont do that i began to think that my face is becoming ugly so after that i wash my face while thinking of handsome faces and then after drying off look at those beautiful male face again and then faces of real people and if i fail to do so i have to do the whole ritual again untill i have done it right i. Prevent mirrors and even camera screen like taking a selfie and the whole day i just keep thinking about beautiful faces but the problem is that from random places in my head ugly face pop up i dont know how to over come i tried my own therapy and even visited a phycologist he recommended and cyperlix a pill everyday but it does not seems to workand if i dont stop this behavior and ritual my parent said that they will disown me and throw me out of house i have controlled some of my obsession and compulsion such as i stopped masterbating because whenever i did it i have to masterbate while thinking and seeing a beautiful face and if not my mind will say that do it again and again it made me do it almost over 50 times or more i would have lost concious but now i dont masterbate just for that reason please help me u r my only hope now after that the only way out is to kill my self