Anyone else have purely obsessional Ocd and has issues with “checking” by replaying conversations and events and exploring all possible worst case possibilities in their head incessantly?. Experiencing this with work right now and could really use some support in this moment.

Hello, I was diagnosed with autism and ADHD at 25 years old. I attributed my overthinking to autism but I realised a few months ago that Pure O OCD is the most meaningful explanation for it. I am also an asexual, so I am, simply put, a shitshow of symptoms. I constantly review the past - particularly painful memories. I have a consistent fear of getting cancelled. When I was 18, some YouTubers I followed got accused of sexual misconduct and cancelled. I was obsessed and concerned for them. Others found my obsession strange. I did not like how their lives were ruined over accusation and no trial. (I was naive then to why public accusations are happening, as it is because the legal system often fails to address predatory men.) Even 6 years later, I googled one of them 240 times between January 2020 and April 2020. It was plain obsessive. When I burned bridges, I continued to search the people involved in my past dramas. Often multiple times in the same day with nothing new to see. They would likely be scared if they knew how obsessed I was with them. I have started doing ERP exercises. I wrote a script where I receive public false allegations and my life is ruined. It is forever googleable and I am a complete pariah. Completely unemployable, unliveable, even my family abandons me. I listen to it for 15 minutes on loop per day. What else would you recommend to tackle the ruminating? I wish I had this information at 18. I should have been solving these issues then and enjoying my life, not figuring it all out so much later in life.

False memory OCD is such a pest. It’s really hard to deal with the feelings of certainty and anxiety, trying to discern if things are false memories or real memories, what if they’re real memories, what if my OCD is right, what if because my OCD was right about one thing it’s also right about this thing, what if it knows something I don’t or haven’t realized yet, what if the real memory it’s taking from is actually false and the false memory is true. And it’s worse because the theme and false memory is so high stakes and it’s terrifying to consider what if it’s actually true and the consequences, but that only feeds the OCD, and it doesn’t help that I keep mentally prodding at it to see if the feelings of certainty are still there. It makes the false memories seem so real, and it’s like it wants me to admit the false memory actually happened when I don’t know that it did, and I’ll never know. I try to sit with the uncertainty but my OCD makes this feel so real and it creates so much certainty that this did happen that it’s so hard to keep telling myself that I don’t know, that this could be a real memory or it might not be and I’ll never know, and to remember that this came up a few days ago and I was pretty sure it was a false memory and I was handling it. Like remembering the false memory made it an actual memory. I have no idea if any of this makes any sense - it’s getting so meta lol. Reading all of this, it’s no wonder it’s so hard to sit with the uncertainty about if it’s a real memory or false. It’s been on my mind over the last week, too, which probably doesn’t help things, because the deeper I try to delve into it, the more complicated it becomes, and trying to point out that logically, it doesn’t make any sense, doesn’t help because my OCD comes up with scenarios and what-ifs and ways that this could have happened. It’s really tough to sit with when my OCD is so convinced this is true and it wants me to be convinced, too. I could really use some support, validation, encouragement, anything. If you made it this far, thanks for reading - please take care of yourselves. ❤️🤗

I've been having a really tough time lately with a recent workplace interaction that occurrd today, and my mind just keeps replaying the events over and over. It feels like an endless loop, and I'm finding it incredibly hard to let go. I'm trying to figure out if this intense replaying is more about my OCD, or if it's a typical reaction to a stressful situation that's being amplified by my OCD tendencies. The specific details of the incident involve a colleague engaging in a racially insensitive discussion that I tried to disengage from. Despite my attempts to steer the conversation away and remove myself, the situation escalated with direct confrontation and accusations. This led to significant emotional distress for me. Later in the day, the same colleague misunderstood another conversation, making baseless accusations and publicly confronting me in a very aggressive way. I kept quiet throughout, just a bit of muttering. The emotional toll of these interactions has been immense. Now, my mind is stuck. I can't seem to stop dwelling on every word, every gesture, and every imagined alternative outcome. Hoping I'm not viewed as the "angry black woman" which is such an affair narrative why can't I state grievances of racism, without this narrative. * how do you manage the relentless replaying of stressful workplace interactions? What are your go-to coping mechanisms when your mind gets "stuck" on these loops? * Have you found any specific strategies helpful for navigating interpersonal conflicts at work when your OCD makes it difficult to process and move past them? * When you're feeling emotionally vulnerable due to work stress, what helps you prevent these situations from turning into prolonged rumination cycles? Any advice or shared experiences would be incredibly helpful. I'll be so grateful for any assistance. I just feel like I'm not good at life.