- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Also, I feel like I'm grossing people out so I will stop posting on here.
- Date posted
- 4y
It’s what this app is for, letting it out. Nobody here will judge you. ?
- Date posted
- 4y
@honiedewz ^^ exactly, please vent if you need to it’s not good to bottle things up. ik it’s bad to give reassurance so I just want to say that things Will get better soon. remember that thoughts are just thoughts even if you don’t believe it atm
- Date posted
- 4y
Try not to beat yourself up so much. Treat yourself with respect and kindness, even when you don’t feel you deserve it. Try practicing positive self talk. You don’t have to beleive what you say, but when you hear yourself thinking something bad about yourself, respond with unconditional kindness. Please keep hanging in there. If you don’t think you can keep yourself safe contact someone who can help or call a hotline. Sometimes you have to explain what ocd is because they might not know much about it. Something like, “I have ocd, it’s a disorder where I experience obsessive unwanted thoughts.”
- Date posted
- 4y
Try not to analyse the thoughts. I know it’s incredibly hard. Accept the thought and continue with a normal behaviour. You will never find the answer you’re looking for because that certainty doesn’t exist. Stopping analysing the thoughts is hard but once you get going it does get easier.
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you all for your support! It means so, so much! It's not just about the thoughts, it's mostly about the things that I did. It seems that I keep going in a spiral and I just can't stop. I keep living in the past by trying to figure out why certain things happened (because of me) and by wishing that they never did. I truly feel a like a monster. I've never seen anyone with a similar issue, except for people who have abused and hurt other people. I know I shouldn't be saying this but I don't want to go through another night or day anymore. The pain of waking up and knowing that I am who I am and that I will never be able to change it makes me want to disappear from this world. I'm really sorry.
- Date posted
- 4y
What needs to happen to make sure you are safe?
- Date posted
- 4y
@Nikki1809 I'm sorry, I don't know.
- Date posted
- 4y
Ok. Do you wanna message me on instagram? I’ll send you a messege.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 20w
Everyday I wake up, all my mind makes me think of is the stuff I’ve done in the past, like all day I’m in a constant cycle of judging who I used to be and it hurts so so much. I wish I never thought to do those things, I wish I had been more mature than how I was before, it’s really lowering my self worth and I don’t think I’ve ever felt this miserable before, like last summer was the worst because I was dealing with this shit, I about almost ended my life over it, and I thought it would get better, which it did, but it didn’t last but for a while. As soon as it became 2025 I was going through it again, having constant cycles of “I’m a good person” to “I’m the worst person imaginable” and I’m so sick of it because I just want to feel like the good person l like to imagine myself to be, but I can’t because of shit I did in the past that I obsess over. I’ve cried and screamed so much over it and it seems like it will never leave me.
- Date posted
- 19w
some days I wake up with so much dread and guilt. It makes it so hard to keep going. I open my eyes and I’m hit with a wave of nausea and terror. I feel ashamed of my compulsions and my OCD. I feel like a monster for my checking compulsions. For momentarily sexualizing things that shouldn’t be sexualized out of anxiety. I’m ashamed of a lot that I give into because of anxiety. Confessing things that are meaningless to my boyfriend. I feel so awful and unworthy of existing and of love. I feel hopeless I don’t want to keep pushing, the more I push the more meta my OCD becomes and the more guilt I feel for this mental illness. The more confusing it becomes to do ERP. If compulsions are a choice, they feel like life or death and it’s driving me insane, I beat myself up so badly over them I’m scared of compulsions, I’m scared of thoughts, I’m scared to be awake, I’m even scared of sleeping because my intrusions and compulsions haunt me there too. I spend my dreams trying to explain or justify my OCD and compulsions to people. I’m exhausted, I want this to stop so badly. My severe OCD isn’t feeling any less severe and it’s been months. I don’t want to keep questioning my every move but I’m so hyperaware of everything I do. I’m so tired. Some days I don’t even have tears to cry with. I’m just so full of despair and shame
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- Date posted
- 9w
(21+ ONLY: TRIGGER WARNING) I honestly feel so overwhelmed by my thoughts—so overwhelmed that I honestly don’t care anymore. I feel like I’m accepting the fact that I’m a monster and have always been a monster. I broke down last night because of these thoughts but I wouldn’t tell anyone if they asked. It wouldn’t make sense to them. This morning, I was watching a body cam video and the person that was arrested was traumadumping about their past SA. I felt like I liked the thoughts and images I got from it. And instead of being disgusted, I let it happen. What does this mean? Does this mean that I’m a monster? Am I a just a monster in disguise?
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