- Username
- avaaa
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Explore more posts
- Username
- steaks3steaks3
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I’m here!
- Username
- GabyGaby
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Hey what’s up!
- Username
- avaaaavaaa
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Hey! So a lot recently my ocd is bringing up past events where I kind of got those feelings similar to the false attraction/anxiety thing and it was before I knew what I had was ocd. So I’m worrying what if I enjoyed those feelings before I discovered hocd and I’m just trying to cover it up with it(I know it sounds stupid!!) also I’m a shy person so I would get excited when I was talking to someone new and my ocd is using that as proof that I actually liked them...so confusing.
- Username
- GabyGaby
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Idk about you but when my ocd digs into my past it twists things and distorts reality so that could be happening to you. And if it’s actually something you felt in the past, there’s no need to re evaluate those past feelings. It’s in the past! Don’t let Ocd make you live in the past. Try to stop ruminating as hard as it is to resist.
- Username
- steaks3steaks3
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I totally understand ocd brings up old memories from your past to make you believe this. This is part of ocd and it’s totally normal but you need to not give into your thoughts because they do not define you. I think it’s important to learn your ocd thoughts versus your real thoughts.
- Username
- avaaaavaaa
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@steaks3 thank you guys for answering!! I’m trying so hard to not ruminate about this but I just cant stop. I was at my friends house and something she said triggered a memory and I couldn’t even enjoy my time hanging out. I ended up going home early because I was so overwhelmed with my thoughts and I couldnt act like myself and enjoy the moment. I definitely feel like most of it is being exaggerated by ocd but it is stemming off of a real memory. When these things had happen was when I was superrr insecure and my social anxiety was awful(not to mention ocd along with it). So like when someone who I looked up to in the way that I wanted a trait of theirs or wanted to look like them talked to me I got this immense anxiety, but was also happy because at the time I was super shy and had only a few friends so I was happy someone was talking to me. But ocd is saying I liked them/had feelings for them and it’s freaking me out...like what if I did in that way and hocd is just a cover up. my ocd has been so bad. I used to be able to hang with friends and only get a few thoughts I could brush off now I can’t hangout normally with people anymore and cannot live in the moment. I’m not sure what to do but I feel like I have to solve this even though I won’t.
- Username
- steaks3steaks3
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I can tell your going through a very hard time . Have you told anybody close to you or a parent because they could help you get therapy. Your ocd knows you best and it’s digging deep into you to make you believe that whatever your thinking about is true. I know I said this before but you need to try to not give into your thoughts something you could try is this 54321 method when your feeling anxious ( just search it up it’s the first that’s pops up) The memories that your ocd brings up will make you overthink everything like if you felt attracted to that person ( its a symptom of hocd).Someone told me if I you didn’t have hocd would you be thinking about if your attracted to that person ( think about it) Anways you do not need to solve your problems it just makes it worse because your giving into your thoughts. Hope that helps
- Username
- avaaaavaaa
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Yes it did help thank you!! My parents and some of my friends know about my anxiety, and a little bit about my ocd, but not about hocd. I used to have a lot of harm ocd tendencies and compulsions a while before this, so they know about that. I haven’t told anyone about hocd though because I feel like the way I describe it will be looked at as denial. I know either way they would accept me and love me as I am but I feel like they won’t understand, you know?
- Username
- steaks3steaks3
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Same I totally get you I’m TERRIFED to tell my family that I’m dealing with this because I’m scared they may think I’m faking it or something. I told my sister that I’m dealing with hocd and I have a fear that she thinks I’m bisexual. I don’t want to tell my mom because I feel like she’s going to think I’m denial because I’ve been thinking about this for longer than I’ve said. Anways keep pushing and fighting your ocd.
- Username
- GabyGaby
- Date posted
- 4y ago
You don’t have to tell ANYONE about your mental health if you don’t feel comfortable. especially with this. If you’re afraid you’ll get triggered really bad and you don’t feel comfortable telling anyone then don’t. It is your right to tell or not tell. Do it on your own time. Or if you do want your family and friends to understand what I would do is show them this video https://youtu.be/z9YB3lojino Because honestly I think Chrissie explains literally everything I’ve experienced and more and when I showed my family and friends this they could understand better. Because I suck at explaining and especially this how do you explain this?? “My Brain is saying I’m gay but I know I’m not but what if I am” that sounds like you’re in denial which you have some insight I’m sure that you’re not “BUT WHAT IF” right? I know it’s hard, but we’re all strong because I feel like only the strongest people go through this.
Related posts
- Username
- Lavander
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I'm so hopeless. I have no one to talk about this, so I come here to vent about everything that has been on my mind, haunting me daily. Since I was a little girl, I've dreamt about my prince charming. I grew up with this in mind, but I never got in a relationship, as I've kept my heart shut, as I've dealt with melancholy and social anxiety. People scared me, and I wanted to make things right (on the way I saw fit for myself). Things got better, I grew up, made some friends. And then, on January, hocd came and changed everything. The fact that I watch same sex porn, and that I have never been in a relationship messed me up so bad. And amongst many thoughts, many what ifs, so much uncertainty, one thing is rock solid. I don't see myself with a woman, it doesn't feel right. Even the idea of being bisexual feels foreign for me. I have nothing against people who are LGBT, but that's not who I've always seen myself. And suddenly, that's all I can think of. Nothing else matters, I feel uncaring and cold. I feel like I'll never find a guy that I love, that im just now finding out that I'm LGBT even if I don't want that. I feel awful, and everyday I think about dying. If this thought crossed my mind before, I'd be so appalled by it, but today I'm pretty serious about it. Hocd is killing me little by little, and I'm crying as I write this. My mind tells me I'm in denial, that I'm just afraid of people's reactions, and that once I accept it, I'll be alright. But I don't want that, I simply don't. My mind doesn't work properly, I can't remember how I used to think before all this, but I remember having dreams, imagining scenarios of my "prince charming", of a future that made me cozy and happy. All that's in my mind now is torturous doubt, that feels so real.
- Username
- Idk
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Seeing so many post on POCD,HOCD,TOCD and others. Makes me feel so bad and realize how sick ocd can make us. It’s so sad honestly, breaks my heart. I just want this stop and we could just all heal. I’m personally afraid that hocd won’t ever stop. I feel like some days it’ll make me ruminate and other I’ll feel calmer but the question is still here. To awareness of it will still be there. I’ve have hocd for 5 months. Sometimes I truly think I’m lesbian. Others I’m just like “but I can’t be, I have feelings for boys and like doing sexual things with them” but I just keep going back and forth. Trying to look Into certain things I do and why I’m doing them. I’ve never developed feelings for a girl. I feel so guilty and bad to be going through this when I have a boyfriend. I feel like I’m doing him wrong. And it sucks so bad. I enjoy being with him I feel myself happy with him. Yet I still worry about this. Also, is there still anyone here with hocd? I haven’t seen many people on here. I’d like to get some advice or not feel alone I guess. Thank you.
- Username
- doloresguppies
- Date posted
- 3y ago
i don’t think i have ocd. i really don’t. yes, i seek reassurance 24/7, ruminate almost all day, check reaction, replay memories over and over, but i don’t have intrusive thoughts like everyone else. also, my hocd started at 11 and is on and off. please someone talk to me.
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