avaaa
- Date posted
- 4y
steaks3steaks3
- Date posted
- 4y
I’m here!
GabyGaby
- Date posted
- 4y
Hey what’s up!
avaaaavaaa
- Date posted
- 4y
Hey! So a lot recently my ocd is bringing up past events where I kind of got those feelings similar to the false attraction/anxiety thing and it was before I knew what I had was ocd. So I’m worrying what if I enjoyed those feelings before I discovered hocd and I’m just trying to cover it up with it(I know it sounds stupid!!) also I’m a shy person so I would get excited when I was talking to someone new and my ocd is using that as proof that I actually liked them...so confusing.
GabyGaby
- Date posted
- 4y
Idk about you but when my ocd digs into my past it twists things and distorts reality so that could be happening to you. And if it’s actually something you felt in the past, there’s no need to re evaluate those past feelings. It’s in the past! Don’t let Ocd make you live in the past. Try to stop ruminating as hard as it is to resist.
steaks3steaks3
- Date posted
- 4y
I totally understand ocd brings up old memories from your past to make you believe this. This is part of ocd and it’s totally normal but you need to not give into your thoughts because they do not define you. I think it’s important to learn your ocd thoughts versus your real thoughts.
avaaaavaaa
- Date posted
- 4y
@steaks3 thank you guys for answering!! I’m trying so hard to not ruminate about this but I just cant stop. I was at my friends house and something she said triggered a memory and I couldn’t even enjoy my time hanging out. I ended up going home early because I was so overwhelmed with my thoughts and I couldnt act like myself and enjoy the moment. I definitely feel like most of it is being exaggerated by ocd but it is stemming off of a real memory. When these things had happen was when I was superrr insecure and my social anxiety was awful(not to mention ocd along with it). So like when someone who I looked up to in the way that I wanted a trait of theirs or wanted to look like them talked to me I got this immense anxiety, but was also happy because at the time I was super shy and had only a few friends so I was happy someone was talking to me. But ocd is saying I liked them/had feelings for them and it’s freaking me out...like what if I did in that way and hocd is just a cover up. my ocd has been so bad. I used to be able to hang with friends and only get a few thoughts I could brush off now I can’t hangout normally with people anymore and cannot live in the moment. I’m not sure what to do but I feel like I have to solve this even though I won’t.
steaks3steaks3
- Date posted
- 4y
I can tell your going through a very hard time . Have you told anybody close to you or a parent because they could help you get therapy. Your ocd knows you best and it’s digging deep into you to make you believe that whatever your thinking about is true. I know I said this before but you need to try to not give into your thoughts something you could try is this 54321 method when your feeling anxious ( just search it up it’s the first that’s pops up) The memories that your ocd brings up will make you overthink everything like if you felt attracted to that person ( its a symptom of hocd).Someone told me if I you didn’t have hocd would you be thinking about if your attracted to that person ( think about it) Anways you do not need to solve your problems it just makes it worse because your giving into your thoughts. Hope that helps
avaaaavaaa
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes it did help thank you!! My parents and some of my friends know about my anxiety, and a little bit about my ocd, but not about hocd. I used to have a lot of harm ocd tendencies and compulsions a while before this, so they know about that. I haven’t told anyone about hocd though because I feel like the way I describe it will be looked at as denial. I know either way they would accept me and love me as I am but I feel like they won’t understand, you know?
steaks3steaks3
- Date posted
- 4y
Same I totally get you I’m TERRIFED to tell my family that I’m dealing with this because I’m scared they may think I’m faking it or something. I told my sister that I’m dealing with hocd and I have a fear that she thinks I’m bisexual. I don’t want to tell my mom because I feel like she’s going to think I’m denial because I’ve been thinking about this for longer than I’ve said. Anways keep pushing and fighting your ocd.
GabyGaby
- Date posted
- 4y
You don’t have to tell ANYONE about your mental health if you don’t feel comfortable. especially with this. If you’re afraid you’ll get triggered really bad and you don’t feel comfortable telling anyone then don’t. It is your right to tell or not tell. Do it on your own time. Or if you do want your family and friends to understand what I would do is show them this video https://youtu.be/z9YB3lojino Because honestly I think Chrissie explains literally everything I’ve experienced and more and when I showed my family and friends this they could understand better. Because I suck at explaining and especially this how do you explain this?? “My Brain is saying I’m gay but I know I’m not but what if I am” that sounds like you’re in denial which you have some insight I’m sure that you’re not “BUT WHAT IF” right? I know it’s hard, but we’re all strong because I feel like only the strongest people go through this.
Related posts
misereri
- Date posted
- 23w
Someone to talk to?please?
Hi, I'm 17,about to be 18. I've been struggling with these thoughts for the past 8 months. I was wondering if someone experienced ever the same because I feel im "different". BACKGROUND: (I'm not diagnosed with Ocd but seeing a local counselor) About 9 months ago I cheated on my boyfriend with this guy S (who blackmailed, manipulated and molested me). Since then when I realized that what i did was very WRONG and so I started ruminating picking apart every single interaction and telling my boyfriend, i tried to remember every single detail because otherwise I felt like i was being a fraud and hiding things to save myself, i had many crisis about it because I had also what i think was false memory ocd. My boyfriend forgave me idk how tbh I still wonder. CURRENT STRUGGLE: Months ago I was sure I didn't wanna S in any way and i was sure even when everything happened. For the past 2 months tho I've been having thoughts like " Do I love S?" "I love S" "S is hot" "Would S find me hot?" "What if I want S?" " What if I don't love my boyfriend enough?" "What if I secretly want S?" "What if I see my boyfriend as a friend only?Do I?" And I tried testing my reaction to intimate scenarios with S, I'm scared I like it i dont really wanna love S or have any secret attraction, I wish I didn't have any of this and I want to be sure of my feelings for my boyfriend because I know I wanna be with him and I see a future with him like he brings me comfort. But a part of me keeps trying to convince me otherwise. Sometimes I think I'd rather die than have these thoughts. Im so scared of not being able to control my feelings, im scared I can't resist S and its giving me anxiety and making me cry. Sometimes when i think of those sexual scenarios with S or I get those thoughts my mind tells me to smile because i like it because I find it funny. It makes me doubt myself all over again. Like I'm always like I need to test if I'd feel aroused to intimate scenarios with S, lately im trying to fight this urge to test and test but my mind is like "just do it this once so you can be sure. I can never watch anything romantic or sexual or whatever because my mind would be like "you and S" or sometimes I'm just enjoying time with my bf and im like " yes we can just have a sneaky cheating thing thats ok" and it makes me want to figure it out to find an answer a solution because idk it just does like I need to find the meaning of it if it means the truth and all. Im worried im just an awful person and these thoughts just ruin my quality of life . Today i had a crisis where i ended up doinf swlf harm, I'm so scared of finding someone that's not my boyfriend desirable or sexual appealing or whatever it is, I also have bodily reactions when I try to imagine and test my reaction to scenarios. Now i keep groing everytime and I dont know why but i have this sensation and I dont want to havebit especially when its something S related. Does someone experience the same thoughts? Am I alone in this? Is this ROCD? What should i do?
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 22w
Hocd
I haven’t been diagnosed with it, but I feel like nothing else describes me better. If you do have this feeling and thoughts, what are some ways to lower your anxiety ?
Luke_McElwee
- Date posted
- 22w
HOCD question
Anyone else with HOCD get thoughts of like "people in denial try to distract themselves" or anything along those lines when just trying to move on from the thoughts. Having a pretty bad episode this morning at least anxiety wise.
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