has anyone here lost their faith and believe in god? like mine is border line religion ocd bc i keep thinking if god is real then why do i keep praying and praying and nothing happens?? i’m still stuck in this whole where i question the most basic thing about myself like my sexuality it feels like my whole world has come down, everything i ever dreamed of is down to crumbles

Remember what they say, this life is a test and God have us all free will. His miracles may be small at times but we must remember even just being here and breathing is a blessing. Just because we have ocd and struggles doesn’t mean that he doesn’t love us but I believe it is because we are the strongest and thus god knows we can handle this burden.

There’s a joke from the movie “The Pursuit of Happiness” A man is drowning in the ocean and someone in a boat comes by, offering to help. The man says “it’s okay, God will save me.” Later on, another boat comes by, offering to help. The man replies “it’s okay, God will save me.” The man dies and goes to heaven. There, he asks God why he wasn’t saved. God replies “I sent you two lifeboats!”

I feel like I’m in a weird place with this right now and have been for some months. When my OCD first appeared I had no clue it was OCD but rather just intense anxiety, still confused on why I was dealing with the constant intrusive thoughts I was dealing with tho. Anyways my family and I are Christians so after talking with them my dad and grandma said how this was a spiritual attack against me. I took that and went for it. I went on a rampage through my room to get rid of anything that wasn’t of God so anything pagan or secular etc. Then I spent a lot of time praying, reading my Bible, etc. I was hoping so badly that there would be a moment where this pain would be lifted and my mind would clear and I was already imagining myself giving this amazing testimony of how God got rid of this attack. I kept waiting and doing my faith routines. There were many times I’d break down crying because I was so frustrated and scared that this wasn’t going away, why God wasn’t helping me, etc. Maybe I wasn’t a good enough Christian or something, but I kept pushing. At one point I went to a Wednesday night Bible study my church has and my pastor brought up a topic that directly related to my intrusive thoughts and I broke down sobbing. After service I confined in him what I was going through and expected him to give me this godly wisdom and encouragement of how this will pass and how God is there for me. Instead I got a completely different answer. He told me to see a mental health counselor. He said how they are there to help us and I would benefit from reaching out to one. Honestly after hearing that I was very conflicted. I was mad at him because that’s not what I wanted to here, because I felt that this was a spiritual attack and thinking this could be something else scared me. I did however decided to take his advice and sought out a therapist. I eventually considered that I might have OCD and when I connected myself with an OCD specialist my suspicions were confirmed and I was diagnosed, then leading to ERP treatment. THATS when I started seeing change, seeing progress, and seeing the beginning of recovery. I think all of this caused great confusion and caused me to step back from my faith some. I honestly felt and still do feel somewhat betrayed. Because I prayed and sought after God to heal me and remove this suffering and it didn’t happen until I had to ultimately seek out a therapist. Im still of course a Christian and I still love God and pray, but it wasn’t as fierce as it was before because I don’t know what to say. I feel hurt and confused. But I try to look at it in other ways. I know God places people in our lives to help us, gives them the skills they need to help. I believe now God put it in my pastor’s heart to tell me to seek a therapist. I believe now these are trials for me to gain compassion, understanding, strength, and to help others as well. We also live in a world where we have free will and the enemy roams around. Many are suffering from different causes, but it’s in those times that it’s most important to trust in God. Just because we are Christians doesn’t mean we won’t suffer, the Word explains that. But we have to keep believing and putting out faith in him during these hard times. He will help us. But i definitely understand the pain of “where are you God”.

I had this experience where I felt like I was becoming an atheist and it was so depressing for me. I’m back now 💜 The God of the Bible is SO real, but I find myself wondering why He doesn’t take away such pain from OCD. I like to think of it as He’s allowing the pain so that Heaven will be that much sweeter. He loves you so much. We just happen to live in broken bodies because of Adam and Eve, and even when we experience Salvation (check out the book Romans in the Bible). Because we have broken bodies (brains), we can use medicine and don’t listen to anybody who tells you differently. God loves you more than you know 💜

hole*

Yeah I went through that for awhile, I lost my faith but it came back.

I think I struggle with this, now that I know what ocd is. What I was taught in Christianity does not measure up to what life is, and it has left me very disappointed, feeling forsaken, like I’m just a pawn in a game, or there’s a larger plan that my feelings don’t matter in (and if that’s the case then why am I just not a robot with no feelings). I get very upset and blame God most times when things go bad or not the way I want them to.

I am now more of a spiritual wanderer, and I mainly focus currently on SGI Buddhism. It’s been helpful. Also the Hare Krishna chant from the Vedic faith has been helpful in reducing my ocd thoughts sometimes, and calms me down. The chant in SGI Buddhism also helps me release inner tension, and helps me get out of bed in the morning sometimes when I am depressed.

I have lost hope. ...I just have a little left.