I think I may be pregnant but it’s still too early to tell. It scares me because I think due to my ocd I may not be a very good mother. I think what if I have to be hospitalized again and can’t be there for my child? Or what if I get the intrusive thoughts about them? The ones about my husband have been coming back slightly but it’s definitely focused on health right now. My friend’s lung collapsed two days ago and she’s my age! (27) and now I’m terrified that it may happen to me or worse I may have a heart attack and die. If I am pregnant I may choose to abort. Idk yet, a part of me thinks that those of us with mental illnesses should be sterilized. I’m curious to know other ppls opinions on this subject...

Username: ElinaElina

Date posted: 5y ago

I have OCD and I’m a mom. I think you need to treat this like anything else in your life and base your decision on your values and in what you want in life. Try to ask yourself - If I didn’t have OCD (I know it’s hard to imagine but it’s essential to do this) would I want kids? If yes - then you need to not follow all the thoughts OCD throws at you. If no - ask yourself how you feel regarding abortion? (If your values are against it, it may negatively affect you to abort but might be easier if your values are not against it). You can still be a great mom despite the OCD! I have been able to understand my children’s needs more than other mom’s because when you suffer from anxiety yourself you understand others’ needs and fears more. My kids have learned to be compassionate because they have seen the struggle of someone close to them. You might have some struggles due to OCD but you’ll see that you can still love through them and your children will love you. It might be a good idea to work with an OCD informed therapist to help you realize whether you want to be a mom or not. It is also normal to be unsure (even without OCD) because it is something new. Do you have a supportive partner?

Username: WanderWayWanderWay

Date posted: 5y ago

If you are, let becoming a mother be your inspiration to focus the next 9 months on your mental fitness. Read Mark Freeman’s “You Are Not a Rock” and use it to help you identify your values and the actions you need to take to live by your values. You would be a wonderful mother. People who have been where we have have the empathy and sensitivity to be tremendous parents. Don’t let this be a reason for you to keep delaying taking action toward the things that matter to you.

Username: kitten21kitten21

Date posted: 5y ago

I think people with mental illness should be able to have children if they want. Unless of course they knew they could or would hurt their children and not be able to control themselves. I know tons of mothers who have babies and their kids are their whole world and they deal with Bipolar, personality disorders, OCD ect... I have felt the same way i sometimes don’t want kids, but i know i would regret it if i never tried out of fear of me passing on OCD or having thoughts about my kids. You can overcome OCD. It doesn’t have to take over your life. You are not a slave to your thoughts and you are stronger than you think. Sometimes you just have to take risks and it could be the best thing you ever did.

Username: TqhTqh

Date posted: 5y ago

My ocd fears are usually about my kids, but still, I don’t regret having them, and I think people with mental illnesses should have kids. We’re just people, and it wouldn’t be fair to treat us different.

Username: ElinaElina

Date posted: 5y ago

@Anxiousashley I love @Wanderway’s advice! Couldn’t agree more!

Username: AnxiousashleyAnxiousashley

Date posted: 5y ago

That’s true. Thank you all for your opinions.

Username: hereintheUK

Date posted: 1y ago

Parents and mums to be…….

Hi everyone I’m new here. I’ve been to hell and back in the last 5 months with my OCD which has affected me with various themes in various ways for since childhood but I’ve only this year discovered I have OCD. I have been suicidal 3 times and very close to ending it all. I have a question for all the parents out there/mums to be suffering with OCD…… I already have a 9 yr old boy and 8 yr old girl and have just found out I’m pregnant again…… I really want to be happy about it but my OCD is determined to make me terrified of having another baby and I am living in fear and dread of changing nappies etc as I know it will start affecting me with POCD type thoughts. I didn’t have OCD anything like as bad as it has been this year when I had my two eldest so never had any issues when they were babies. But I don’t even know how to feel except I am terrified now and very seriously considering abortion just to not go through what the OCD may do to me mentally! Though it would devastate my partner. I have had minimal therapy so far since August but no ERP therapy, I’ve lost faith in therapists as I’m yet to meet one that actually knows what OCD is like for those of us living with it. Is anyone else currently facing this situation with being pregnant or been through/currently going through it? How are you coping? Please don’t give too many details as I am scared of being triggered

Username: EFF_OCD

Date posted: 1y ago

Lindsay Clancy case…

This case has convinced me because of my ocd, I am unworthy of motherhood. I have harm ocd so how bad would my PP ocd be? It’s honestly my biggest fear to ever hurt someone it makes me sick to think about. I have been a wreck all night and just want to cry. My fiancé wants a child. So do I. But how do I tell him I don’t think I can do it now. My advice is not to get on Tik tok if this story triggers you bc it’s flooded with videos. I feel hopeless about this and it’s even triggered my harm ocd in general about anyone and anything right now. Ugh!!! Hugs to anyone else who is struggling. & to moms with OCD, I want you to know that you are warriors and my BIGGEST hope and inspiration. Maybe OCD will take motherhood from me, but maybe it won’t. I don’t know. I’m a mess and I feel like no one understands 🥹

Username: kanyewestlov...

Date posted: 1y ago

should i still have kids?

i haven’t been diagnosed w/ ocd but my therapist says i have like symptoms of it but i recently just stared dealing w/ Pocd (hell) that my therapist says was triggered from the sound of freedom which absolutely breaks my heart bc i was so excited to support the movie but now i feel like it’s one of my biggest regrets. i feel as if i would’ve never watched the movie i would’ve possibly never started dealing w/ this. But my biggest scare now w/ this is having my own kids . i’m F18 and throughout my whole teenhood my biggest goal and dream was to become a mother a GOOD mother. everything i tried doing was motivated by the thoughts of giving my kids the absolute best one day. Now i feel like it’s my biggest fear w/ dealing w/ this and i don’t know how i’d even explain to someone like my bf for example, of the reason why i don’t want to have kids anymore ( though i still really do but i just literally feel like can’t because of this 💔💔) are there any mothers out there w/ Pocd w/ kids out here? how do you cope w/ this? should i even have kids?? i also feel as if it kinda bad rn. i was doing good for a couple weeks and last night it just rushed back for no reason. i’ve learned what groinal responses are ( it absolutely scared the shit out of me before i found out what it was and i was just not okay and sort still am not when it happens. it just feel too real and i end up sobbing god i hate this ) and i feel as if i’m constantly body checking myself especially when i see a cute baby or children tiktok i love babies n kids id never wanna hurt them in such away i rather pass away. i just can’t believe why this this happening i used to be so much more happier before this and i really don’t know how to deal w/ this and what i should do😖💔💔

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