- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
I have OCD and I’m a mom. I think you need to treat this like anything else in your life and base your decision on your values and in what you want in life. Try to ask yourself - If I didn’t have OCD (I know it’s hard to imagine but it’s essential to do this) would I want kids? If yes - then you need to not follow all the thoughts OCD throws at you. If no - ask yourself how you feel regarding abortion? (If your values are against it, it may negatively affect you to abort but might be easier if your values are not against it). You can still be a great mom despite the OCD! I have been able to understand my children’s needs more than other mom’s because when you suffer from anxiety yourself you understand others’ needs and fears more. My kids have learned to be compassionate because they have seen the struggle of someone close to them. You might have some struggles due to OCD but you’ll see that you can still love through them and your children will love you. It might be a good idea to work with an OCD informed therapist to help you realize whether you want to be a mom or not. It is also normal to be unsure (even without OCD) because it is something new. Do you have a supportive partner?
- Date posted
- 6y
If you are, let becoming a mother be your inspiration to focus the next 9 months on your mental fitness. Read Mark Freeman’s “You Are Not a Rock” and use it to help you identify your values and the actions you need to take to live by your values. You would be a wonderful mother. People who have been where we have have the empathy and sensitivity to be tremendous parents. Don’t let this be a reason for you to keep delaying taking action toward the things that matter to you.
- Date posted
- 6y
I think people with mental illness should be able to have children if they want. Unless of course they knew they could or would hurt their children and not be able to control themselves. I know tons of mothers who have babies and their kids are their whole world and they deal with Bipolar, personality disorders, OCD ect... I have felt the same way i sometimes don’t want kids, but i know i would regret it if i never tried out of fear of me passing on OCD or having thoughts about my kids. You can overcome OCD. It doesn’t have to take over your life. You are not a slave to your thoughts and you are stronger than you think. Sometimes you just have to take risks and it could be the best thing you ever did.
- Date posted
- 6y
My ocd fears are usually about my kids, but still, I don’t regret having them, and I think people with mental illnesses should have kids. We’re just people, and it wouldn’t be fair to treat us different.
- Date posted
- 6y
@Anxiousashley I love @Wanderway’s advice! Couldn’t agree more!
- Date posted
- 6y
That’s true. Thank you all for your opinions.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
I'm 21 and eventually I would like to have a child. I am terrified about the fact that I could have sexual thoughts about them... So now I am filled with intrusive thoughts. How should I respond to these? "So yes, what if I will have intrusive thoughts about that?" But im terrified because a normal person shouldnt think about even that at all. I am so scared. I cannot respond "what if" because this is too serious and it makes me so bad if i respond "what if"
- Date posted
- 21w
Hi everyone, this is giving me so much anxiety even saying this out loud because my OcD is telling me that somehow someone will know who I am on here and report me this goes with what I’m about to say about my irrational stuff. Since my baby was born I’ve had a lot of majorrr anxiety about him getting sick. From there my postpartum ocd spiked. I had this irrational fear someone would falsely report me as a bad mom and I’d get my baby taken from me. I’ve NEVER had anyone tell me I’m a bad mom, as a matter of fact, almost every day I get praised for how good of a mom I am. My child is so loved and taken care of. So why did I have that fear? it CONSUMED ME. Obsessively cleaning my house in case a social worker came. Stopped posting myself having occasional girls nights out for dinner because I thought one of my followers would think I’m a bad mom for getting a break. Not being able to talk about ANYTHING or send pictures of my baby to family and friends to update them since we live out of state because somehow I thought I would say something wrong or do something that would make someone think I’m a bad mom. I was convinced my baby was gonna be taken for zero reason. I still sometimes catch myself over analyzing myself and what I say because I don’t want to say the wrong thing and someone think I’m not a fit mom. I would even replay every scenario I remember and then second guess myself if that really happened or if I said something or not and freak out and spiral from there. with driving, if I go over a speed bump I have to double check it wasn’t magically a person. Then I panic even though I know for a fact it was a speed bump. I hate living like this. I feel crazy. I don’t open up because I feel like I’m the only person in the world. The one time I opened up about driving it was used against me. I feel like I’m drowning and I’m failing as a mom. I don’t even open up to a therapist about my irrational fear about baby being taken bc I don’t want them to think I’m a bad mom. It just doesn’t stop.
- Date posted
- 16w
I just wanted to ask any mothers their experience with having children & the positive experiences they’ve had despite their diagnosis (even the small moments of joy)? I have always yearned to have children & grow a family however recently OCD has made me question this desire (though when I’m back to thinking rationally my heart knows I’m meant for motherhood). though I’m not oblivious to how difficult it must be, I thought it would be nice to see the good amongst the bad, not just for me but for anyone else feeling a similar way 🫶🏼
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