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Okay wow I can relate to this so much! It’s comforting to know there’s other people my age going through this
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Yeah definitely you’re not alone!!! I was super hesitant about talking about it bc I honestly haven’t done anything romantic ever in my life, and I’ve been super embarrassed about it for years 😭
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@aurokoi Same!! Like in college I had ‘flings’ and talked to a couple guys but it just never worked out and I completely blame my ocd for it.
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@bay97 It’s not our fault we’re dealing with this!! My OCD didn’t flare up until quarantine, but I’m highly suspicious that I dealt with Existential OCD when I was 16, which yeah, DEFINITELY made it hard to connect with anyone even if I wanted to. But we’re all worthy of love even with OCD bc OCD is just one thing about ourselves, and I know for a fact we’re all people with a lot of potential when this thing isn’t in the forefront.
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@aurokoi I’ve had GAD since I was 10 but started having OCD about 4yrs ago. I agree completely!! I’ve made this thing control my life for so long but now I’m trying to just remind myself it’s only a part of me
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@bay97 Anxiety is just the worst, and I’ve heard it can get very complicated when the two are combined. But the fact that you have the motivation and the drive to get better is something you should feel proud of! The real you is still there.
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@aurokoi Thank you!! It’s so helpful to know I’m not alone with this disorder!
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OMG RIGHT!! I had anxiety over it bc I was honestly super embarrassed about how I’m so inexperienced and it made me feel uncomfortable in certain situations and it’s like my brain was telling me I felt like that because I was just anxious about liking a guy because I didn’t actually. Which is not true at all bc i never thought it was right to force yourself to like someone. I’m just 🤬🤬 I just wanna cuddle with a guy without feeling like
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@aurokoi I’m lying to myself**
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Also FINALLY SOMEONE WHO’S IN THE SAME AGE RANGE AND EXPERIENCE AS ME 😭😭
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@🐝 YES OMG!!! Like I’d always LOVE hearing about my friends stories but lowkey I was jealous bc I wanted that so bad too but IM A PUSSY TOO 😭😭 also dude you have no idea, last year I peaked identity wise and was feeling SO GOOD in my skin and who I was shaping up to be and WHO I AM NOW IS THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE 😭
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@🐝 I’m dealing with TOCD 🥴🥴 my identity don’t exist no more
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@🐝 I’m doing a looooot better compared to a few months ago. The anxiety has gone down and I don’t react to the thoughts but I’ve only done self programs so i constantly don’t know what the truth is lol. It sucks deadass like more so than HOCD, I know this one is stupid because I love being a girl but it uses my interests and hobbies against me. With HOCD it’s like... I honestly have no idea but I really don’t want to ‘experiment’ and figure it out? And my brain uses that against me 😭 ALSO YES I HAVE DISCORD: no ❤🦋✨#8571 And how are you coping with POCD? I think that’s one of hardest themes to deal with personally 🥺
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Oh my gosh I'm 20, I have never dated and I've said this exact thing 😭
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VALIDATIONNNNNN we all need to get together and make a group chat honestly 😭❤️
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@aurokoi There is one if you're on instagram!! Just message hocdawareness and she'll add you or I can if you're comfortable leaving your account name! The admin also struggled with hocd. It's so nice to talk to people who relate.
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@thebeginning OH WOW omg okay. I might have to look into that. Thank you so much!
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Team single! I like being single but at the same time dont want to be ALL alone. I’ve never been on a date. I’m 25. I also think no one would love me so . .
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Omg girl I feel you!!!! When I was at my highest last year I really embraced the idea of just remaining single. It doesn’t seem too bad to me, and I genuinely appreciate my platonic connections so much. Like you, I don’t want to be alone alone forever, but I don’t think I’d lack if I didn’t have a romantic partner. Also, idk you but I promise you, you are 100% loveable :)
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I am not dating anyone. I want to be single for the rest of my life due to my ocd.
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Honestly same 😭 before I was like pretty okay with the idea of being single long term bc I have so much I want to do with my life that I didn’t see how a relationship could fit in with it all but see that was a nice day dream bc I chose it and now it feels like I have no say in it 😭
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@aurokoi I don’t feel an attraction to men in real life and I’m scared that they will think my rituals are weird or they might not love me because of my ocd.
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@hanajade A lot of it is just being open and honest with your partner, and as much as it sucks there’s an element of explanation and teaching that goes into it because OCD is so misunderstood, but I think people - even men - are a lot more accepting than we give them credit for. Recovery in part is learning that all parts of you, even the OCD one, deserves to be loved :) I believe in you! Be kind to yourself, and stay committed to recovery, no matter what people think or how long it takes.
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Yeah I’ve never had a legit girlfriend just talked to girls and it never worked out. I’ve always wanted to fall in love with a girl but my ocd has made that feel impossible. But yeah the sexual orientation ocd uses that against me all the time. Especially with covid now it’s impossible to meet people. I’m 24 btw
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Suuuuper relatable omg. I’m 20, and I’ve been hit on before but the guys were always kinda crass about it and it made me feel gross and whew does my ocd have a feast off that 😭 I believe in us though.
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17 but totally relate
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It sucks major butt!! I believe in us though >:( I refuse to let ocd be the reason I am single lol
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Fam you’re all SO VALID LIKE SERIOUSLY there’s already so much emphasis on people meeting certain milestones by certain ages that would make even a normal person feel bad (even though there’s absolutely nothing to feel bad about) but with OCD it’s like another layer of hell and insecurity 😭 we got this though!
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Absolutely. I actually struggled with this way before I was even diagnosed, so it hit me especially hard. And as a guy being a Virgin is tied into your masculinity so much, it hurt me that much more. I actually had chances to have sex before I finally did with my first girlfriend at 22, but I didn’t because I was so petrified of it all. But even when I finally had a girlfriend I was already an addict and using it to overcome my anxiety and my ocd. I’m 28 now and I’ll tell you, it’s hard. I’ve had a couple of serious relationships now and it’s hard to maintain them because your SOOCD ad ROCD takes a toll on both you and your partner. I just got diagnosed a year or so ago and I know things can be managed.
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I’m 19 and have never had a boyfriend, simply because the boys i liked never liked me back and the boys that liked me were a) few and far between and b) so gross. my ocd uses this as “proof” that i’m just not “meant” to be with a man and it’s terrifying
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Might be the only dude here, but I've always wanted a girlfriend ever since high school started but all that did was cause me to make mistakes that I wish I never made to begin with. Most things that have to do with romancing with someone and sexual activity makes me uncomfortable because of the mistakes that have came along the way because of it. Mistakes that I've made that would never repeat. I dunno, I'm kinda scared to date because I don't want to experience the hurt behind it. At the same time I feel like I'm missing out and honestly feeling a little jealous because people way younger than me have even found love. But, I try not to be jealous for too long and be happy with such young love. It's nice to see people exploring what they want the right way. I just wish it went the right way for me too I guess.
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Nope I commented yesterday on this
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I wasn’t allowed to date at all growing up so when I got into uni I was looking forward to it, even though I was going thru some other things. I can’t even begin to explain how badly I wanted a bf. But my brain uses the fact that I’ve never dated, even secretly and going against my parents, that it’s proof that I was never attracted to them to begin with 😭😭
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Ooh me too. And it sucks because now I’m in uni and I can’t get one at all so now it’s making me question things
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@stop. Sameee!! I’m in my third year. And it’s I’m dealing with both the insecurity of getting this far without ANYTHING, but add constantly questioning myself it doesn’t make me feel any bettr
Related posts
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- 14w ago
I feel like I’ll never lead a normal life again with OCD, my thoughts have begun to be convince especially about POCD. I feel like so sad and down that this will be my life forever. I’ll never get to fall in love again without intrusive thoughts. I’ll never be worth falling in love with. I can never be intimate again. I’m just done, my life is over. I can’t even look at my nephew and niece anymore without the smile fading. It feels like I’m so nasty and then my brain convinces me this is how I feel. That there’s some part of me that is a p*do and that’s it. I’m a disgusting human being for that. I just feel hopeless
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- 10w ago
I have had multiple experiences where I was too clingy or literally cried when someone i have known for 3 days stops talking to me. I have fixated on the idea that I am never going to be in a happy relationship so anytime someone is nice to me I hold my breath hoping we will fall in love and get married, even if don't know eachother. I find myself over looking qualities that I usually would not like and constantly seeking their validation.
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- 9w ago
It sucks because wanting to have a lover is a natural human desire and I'm afraid that my OCD about being alone forever will make it true. I'm a weird person, I'm autistic and I have odd kinks, so the idea that no one will ever love me just keeps coming back I'm trying to tell myself that I deserve a relationship and my kinks make my uniquely fun and loveable to the right people so I'm just going to keep repeating that and hope it comes true. I also made myself a Valentine... So there's that. I'm doing my best Hope you have a great day
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