- Username
- Anastasia1
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. OCD can be extremely isolating because non OCD people just don’t understand. I was in a similar place as you, hopeless and depressed. I called the suicide hotline several times. I had 4 different therapists in 2 months because none knew how to treat me. Then I came across NOCD and it changed everything for me. To start having this community of people who can relate to you will give you a sense of belonging. You are not crazy and you are not broken. Doing ERP will change your life. The one tip I can give you is to practice ERP even on the days that you do not have a session. I believe in you ❤️
Thank you so much, it really helps knowing that ERP has helped a lot of people with ocd. It feels really good to have a community of people who don’t think I’m crazy or a bad person, and who care. I really really appreciate it, thank you ♥️
Are you in treatment? If not, what’s stopping you?
I’m in therapy, but she doesn’t really know much about OCD. I just got this app and am scheduling a free appointment, but i am scared nothings gonna work.
@Anastasia1 Awesome job scheduling an appointment here! Working with an ocd specialist is key for recovery. Regular therapists just don’t cut it when it comes to ocd. They can be incredibly helpful for other problems, but not addressing obsessions. ERP works for more than 80% of people who do it. You have every reason to believe it will likely help you too.
@pureolife Thank you, god I hope so. I feel like I have some really strange ocd themes. I hope it works
@Anastasia1 They really give you tools you can actually apply to yourself. Even if you relapse, you're never back to square 1 because you know what you have to do to get back on the horse!
That is so hard and I am positive nobody knows your pain and that hurts in itself. You didn’t put those thoughts in your mind so please don’t blame or get mad at yourself for thinking someone or something is going to turn out bad. Your thoughts don’t control or affect anything that goes on around you. All you can do is try your best everyday and if standing up is the best you can do that day then good for you! Always push yourself (as long as you can) and try opening up to your family maybe they can help more then you realize.
Thank you, it really helps talking to people who understand.
What is ERP?
I find myself questioning things I’d never question about my life. I’m thinking I’ve actually been driven to contemplate these dark things because my ocd has pushed me over the edge. So it’s kinda that my intrusive thoughts have come true. It’s not fair! I feel super hopeless, then I get scared that I felt that way then the ocd kicks in and I start contemplating things like “it’s all hopeless I feel I am going to carry out (insert violent thought here).”. I don’t get it guys… I don’t have the money for therapy right now so crisis chats and this is my best option. I’ll definitely say ocd and my poor sleep bug habit are what has pushed me to these depths. What I don’t get though is I’m not inherently violent, I thought I was always a hopeful person on the inside, I don’t have depression. That and I love my family, I don’t want harm to come to them but the moment I get the hopelessness it makes me question wether or not it’s worth it. I’m living my worst nightmare. By the way I’m not dangerous, I don’t have any deficits in empathy what’s wrong with me. I’m in denial, I can’t believe I’m capable of genuinely thinking these things. Oh and then I have this suicidal spiral. I’ve had suicidal ocd but now I think it’s also partially true since I’ve been in such a dark spot. I know they say that if you’re not comforted by the idea of sleeping forever it prolly means it’s just ocd and well let me say it’s not comforting. Back to back I’m like “do I want to kill myself? Am I feeling that? Will I do it?” And I feel so hopeless that the thought comes in but no I DONT WANT IT. So it’s like half ocd and half my mental distress. But lord no I don’t want it and I don’t want to live in a reality where I contemplate it. Someone just help me… Why are my emotions so intense I question these things? Ocd is involved I know but I’m telling you this hopelessness had made me contemplate things that ocd wouldn’t typically do. I don’t have personality disorders or any other mental illness. HELP ME!
I think this is the hardest theme I’ve dealt with, it feels so real & the thoughts/sensations are so strong. The thought that really stumps me is when my OCD tells me that I don’t want to live anymore & that I don’t like the life that I have & it’s fueled by a ton of anxiety. If you’ve went through this & got through it please tell me how, I feel like I have to react to my thoughts or something bad will happen.
I need some support from anyone who’s willing to offer it, please. My ocd, particularly scrupulosity, has been making my life a living hell. I can’t ignore my suspicions and compulsions and they rule my life. I’m debating whether or not the God I rely on even exists, and quite frankly I’ve been thinking about suicide. I don’t know how to tell my loved ones. I was in a position where I had to talk someone down from suicide at a young age and it crushed me afterwards. I know suicide is wrong, and I’m scared to think about it, but I don’t know how I can live. I just need someone to know.
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