- Username
- ELO
- Date posted
- 5y ago
The moment it comes up you have to say no. Don’t go in too deep into it. I know it sounds easier than it is but it has worked for me. I had a friend who lied about where they went to college, lied about his intentions with me by sending me letters in the navy and stalked me by pulling up behind my car at night with my boyfriend in the car. I’m a writer so I do like to write. I allow the intrusions to come about for creativity during and when I write my book. Once I’m no longer working on the book, I come back to reality and say no. I’m in the present not the past. Think of the worst thing the ex did to you. The intrusions may make you think you don’t deserve your bf but that’s not true!
The intrusions definitely do make me believe I don’t deserve my boyfriend. Thank you @casepag! Do your intrusions make think you feel different?
I say well done for recognizing your intrusive thoughts for what they are, OCD. Also well done for bravely attempting ERP. It sounds like that session just got ahead of you a bit. You have thoughts about an ex and all they are are thoughts. It’s your reaction to them that causes the guilt and turmoil. I know it’s not easy but keep on practicing! When the thought of the ex walks through your mind just nod at it and let it keep walking. No need to pretend like it doesn’t exist but there is no need to ponder it further. They will decrease with time.
Thank you @beamer. Along with the intrusive thoughts they bring fake feelings or intrusive feelings as I call them, about this ex. But I know they are not me. That’s what leaves me feeling depressed and stressed. I will try and continue with ERP and practicing. Thank you again!
I don't like these intrusive images and thoughts of my ex. I just want to be happy with my boyfriend. I wanna scream. I want these thoughts to stop. I really just want to be happy with my boyfriend but these stupid intrusive thoughts are pulling me down. And you might be wondering if I had what-if thoughts with other guys, yes. That's why I'm aware it's obsessive intrusive thoughts. This time, it latched on to my ex. My brain is making me think that I love him. I never had intrusive thoughts about him months before when I started suffering from rOCD. It's so scary because the thoughts feel so real. Any advice would be nice. I'm undergoing psychotherapy and meds (fluoxetine 20mg and olanzapine 5mg combo)
My Rocd has attached itself to my ex. Saying that he is the one for me instead of my boyfriend who I want to spend the rest of my life with. I just don’t know what to do anymore, has anyone else experienced this??? Please I need support right now.
so back in july i made a mistake of going behind my partner’s back and hanging out with an old guy friend (who i had a romantic past with) and while i was hanging out with him i had a great time but man my thoughts were going crazy. i found him attractive, funny, etc. i’ve known him for years and everytime we would talk i felt there was some type of tension. like romantic or something. well i felt it again when we hung out and immediately regretted it because i know i love my boyfriend a lot and i felt like a horrible person for doing something like that. i couldn’t hide it from him any longer than i did (not even 3 days) so i told him and he got really upset. at the time i didn’t know what i want, either my boyfriend or that friend. i decided to stay with my boyfriend and ever since i’ve been getting crazy intrusive thoughts about my old friend (i blocked him so i don’t have contact with him). a few months later (now) i know that i want and love my boyfriend, i don’t want to be with anyone else. but i’ve been getting so many intrusive thoughts about that guy and seeing certain posts just remind me of him even when i don’t want them to. then my brain starts to spiral - ‘what if you actually want to be with him instead and you’re just in denial right now’ or something like ‘you dont love your boyfriend, if you did you wouldnt be having these thoughts’ and i’m just so..drained. i’m so tired of thinking about this guy, i seriously don’t want to think about him. i just want to be happy with my boyfriend. i keep telling myself i know what i want, because i do. i want to be with my bf and i want to be happy with him…i love him so much. but my brain just tries to tell me otherwise. i know i messed up and i’m paying the price for it. maybe i do deserve this. i just wish i could erase everything, my past, etc. and just move on. my boyfriend doesn’t hold what i did against me but he’s well aware of what happened and i know how it made him feel. i would do anything to take it back because he doesn’t deserve that, he never did. and i seriously want to be better for him. but these constant thoughts i get are always getting in the way and almost making me feel hopeless. i haven’t told my bf about these thoughts because i’m worried he would take it the wrong way. i really don’t think i should tell him because i know for a fact it would send us both down a spiral and i don’t want that. but, ocd will always try to get what it wants. anyone else going through something similar? some common humanity would probably ease my mind a bit. (in a non-compulsive way. or maybe this is a compulsion. idk.)
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