Rhys34
- Date posted
- 4y
whatadooowhatadooo
- Date posted
- 4y
I suggest you don't use the term friend zone, ain't nothing worse than feeling like you had a genuine friend only to find they just wanted to f*ck you the whole time (from a girl's perspective lol) that term belittles the goodness of friendship as some how inferior. what you should say is that they've" looked at me as a friend when I wanted more" , you should state your intentions and interest in them early. If you don't state that you're interested in a romantic or sexual way and make it obvious that you'd love to get to know them and eventually date them, then being friends is a default for all people.
whatadooowhatadooo
- Date posted
- 4y
Not even more, but wanted something different.
IAWildFanIAWildFan
- Date posted
- 4y
Sounds just like me. Keep your head up and remember chicks don't like guys who are down on themselves. Besides there is more to life than girls but then again its natural so just do what you can do.
whatadooowhatadooo
- Date posted
- 4y
21 is still so young I promise you and its actually great you didn't get so romantically involved and go through all the trauma teenagers who engage in relationships go through, those traumas fuck up all their adult relationships. You will have a fresh start instead.
DrvmstickDrvmstick
- Date posted
- 4y
You need to get over your perceived need for a gf before you can have one. You can only be in a successful relationship if you see yourself as a whole valid person while single. Your current perception breeds codependency and that’s toxic. Also, you’re 21 there’s no rush. I didn’t have my first real relationship until I was 25. My gf was 27 and I’m her first as well. I used to have the same kind of attitude as you and I largely attribute my previous failures in the dating world on that. That and the fact that I’ve always dealt with ROCD, which I’m pleased to say I’m recovering from. Work on yourself, you’re worth no less as a single person. Also, I’d suggest you not use the term friendzone. Gives the vibe that you were only talking to someone for your own needs and that doesn’t come off well to many folks. Just a tip
Related posts
Gato0z
- Date posted
- 25w
Any advice?
I feel completely unlovable. I have a difficult time getting close to people because of my OCD and I have to force myself to not compulsively seek reassurance. I feel like I’ll never find my person. I’m worried I’ll be an awful wife because of my inability to do anything. I want to show up for my partner, but I feel stuck because of my OCD. I think it’s safer to just be alone.
jcai68
- Date posted
- 22w
Anyone else get really hung up on crushes?
Okay, just wanna start by saying that I don’t have ROCD. I have perfectionism OCD, and I get intrusive thoughts that no one will like me, I’ll lose all my friends, I’ll be alone for life, etc. if I don’t have things “just right.” I feel like every time I like someone, my OCD just gets worse cause if I don’t perform compulsions, I feel like I have no chance with him. Your handwriting wasn’t smooth? Guess your love life won’t be either. The volume of your phone was too low? Guess your chances with him are too. Failed to draw your graph perfectly symmetrical? Guess what else you’ll fail at. It’s honestly exhausting, and that it isn’t even it. I feel like I tend to fixate on my crushes also. I wanna be 100% sure they’re a good fit before making a move, and that’s really problematic cause there’s just no way to know. And even if I deem that they’re a good guy, I STILL won’t do anything cause I always expect the worst! What if the first impression that I make is so bad that he wants nothing to do with me? I put so much pressure on myself to get him to like me back that I’m terrified to make a move. I’m so focused on the prospect of a second convo that I don’t even want to have the first convo! Like rn, there’s this dude that caught my eye. He’s a senior in high school, while I’m a junior. I’m taking AP bio, and he’s taking AP chem—both are 1.5 periods, so I see him in the cafe and during the passing period (we leave the cafe halfway through the lunch period). I purposely plant myself next to him in the halls during the passing period but haven’t worked up the courage to talk to him. He’s single, I don’t have any classes with him this year, he’ll be at college next year, we follow each other on instagram, and my friends have told me that he’s nice (and keeps to himself), so there’s minimal risk in trying to talk to him. Thing is though, every time I think about introducing myself, I just imagine all the ways that it can go wrong. What if he hates me? What if my first impression is actually good and we become friends, but he doesn’t like me back? What if I tell him I like him over messages, and he screenshots my text and posts it on his instagram story? I don’t know what to do. I know that high school is kinda early and that I still have time to figure things out. I’m just worried that I still won’t have things figured out when I need to. Any advice or personal experience would be welcome and greatly appreciated!
justdiya22
- Date posted
- 15w
Will I ever be in a relationship that I don't ruin
I ruin every single relationship that I'm in with my OCD I admit every single thing I do even when it really isn't a big deal ,if I don't admit I feel unbearable anxiety and I don't know what to do about it , I'm always on edge worried I've done something wrong always searching my mind and actions for a slip up it's exhausting I keep spiralling wondering if I will ever actually be with someone and be able to have a happy and healthy relationship Please tell me I'm not alone I don't know what else to do
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