- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
i saw that too:( all i have to say is you will live a happy life! just because you have ocd does not mean you won’t have a good future/life. if you want to get married and have kids do it!! you are deserving of so much and deserve love and more! it might be tricky with ocd but at one point in your life you will be calm with your ocd! my advice is to go to therapy if you aren’t in it already and do erp. it will help you sooo much and therapy is so good for you! i’m wishing you the best. you got this:)
- Date posted
- 4y
I’ve been meaning to start therapy. My only concern is that I’ll be pushed into telling the therapist the nature of my thoughts and that’s the part that scares me. My brains telling me if I tell a therapist my thoughts they’ll say that I’m an exception to ocd and they’re true (which is pretty irrational I know) so I was wondering does yours push you into saying what your thoughts consist of? Or should I be able to get away with not saying what they’re about until I get comfortable?
- Date posted
- 4y
@Anonymous it took me a bit to talk about my ocd themes and i know it can be very scary but with an ocd specialist they know about pretty much every intrusive thought they’ve heard it all. start by talking about a little bit of your thoughts maybe not the extreme ones and work your way up to talking about it more! take your time and do whatever makes you comfortable!
- Date posted
- 4y
@sb12367 Thank you so much you’ve helped a lot!
- Date posted
- 4y
There’s a lot of stigma with dating people with mental illnesses and just being with people that have some sort of disability or dysfunction in general. I remember telling my advisor that I feel like a burden to anyone who would roommate with me which is why I didn’t want one. My advisor is blind and she has felt the same way. She told me that even though it’s common to feel like a burden, you’re not. Anyone who loves and cares about you will stick with you. No one is easy to be with period. We all have something that can make it difficult at times. That’s okay. I feel like there’s always that concern that having unaddressed issues or trauma will impact someone in your life and it can. My mom has unaddressed trauma and mental health issues. She is emotionally abusive towards me and struggles to parent. I think maybe that’s what they were referring to. Not that people with OCD or even severe OCD can’t be with people, but people who have completely unaddressed problems that are out of control can negatively impact how they interact with people. If you’re starting therapy or at least have some self awareness about it and are conscious about what you do as a partner, I think you’re okay. OCD shouldn’t stop anyone from doing anything.
- Date posted
- 4y
To a certain extent, I’d say they’re right. Any mental illness out of control affects those around you. It’s a hard truth, but it is what it is.
- Date posted
- 4y
i think anyone can get married and do whatever they want. i don’t think people should be sharing any negative stuff like this. yes you are right it might make it hard sometimes but like i said if someone truly loves you and wants to be with you they will work it out and be a team and if it doesn’t work it doesn’t. it doesn’t hurt to try to fall in love. anyone can do it i feel theres a stigma around people with mental illness shouldn’t get married when really they can do whatever they want that’s their business and they will make it work
- Date posted
- 4y
@sb12367 You can do whatever you want, but you also have to think about the people around you. Life isn’t all about you, it’s about others as well. Healing is up to you, and it’s great to have a spouse that supports you. But after a certain point, it’s on you to fix yourself and realize if you’re being toxic, there’s a chance you’ll be broken up with.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
First off - I’m sorry, I post here a lot. My thoughts are going to be scattered because I have the adhd/ocd/executive dysfunction wombo combo. Im so embarrassed I am THIS neurodivergent. I swear my brain couldn’t pick one struggle and settle with it. I’m not making these diagnoses quirky personality traits by any means, in fact, in this post im venting about how exhausting and embarassed I am living with a brain like this on the daily. I need to hear someone’s advice please. I love hearing everyone’s advice on posts because it’s so useful, and brings me back down to reality. Everyone on here gives advice so tastefully in a way where it doesn’t feed into the self reassurance compulsion, but it’s also been thorough and constructive enough where it’s reminded me to ground myself in a healthy way. I love seeing others helping others, it soothes me. This community has been so kind, and I’m so happy I found it. I wish I could ask more, but I have so many questions I think it’d drive everyone here crazy lol. I am doing erp therapy now, and it’s been teaching me so many amazing techniques. I’ve been making progress. However, I sometimes have my moments of vunerablity. I’ve been experiencing this especially now more than ever because I am going through a breakup. He did it through text after nearly 9 months together. I’d do anything for him and love him through anything, and he broke my heart when I least expected it. I’d make his bed for him multiple times, but I haven’t done that for myself in years. I’d sit with him for hours to watch and do anything he likes, but he’d never do the same and I’d never do the same for me. I’m also at fault because I was too scared to speak up so I let a lot of disrespect slide. Why did my ocd do that? Why does ocd make me people please even when I don’t want to? Why does OCD make me care so much about things that will never effect me (like wanting validation from a random person on the street and hoping they’ll think I’m pretty enough to look at), but then when it comes to my future or positive wellbeing (like focusing on college/doing well in classes/personal hygiene/health), forces me to not care/neglect myself and those needs? I don’t understand it. Ocd makes me think everything’s a setup or a trap. I can never believe that I am fine right where I want to be. Why am I so hard on myself? Why do I even think this much? I care and feel so deeply but it becomes unhealthy so fast because ocd makes me fixate and I stay there for a while. For some reason I let this breakup define my self worth. I let it topple into the ocd fear that I will never make it in life - that I won’t be successful, I’ll never get the career I want, the love I want, or the life I want. My OCD’s version of “logic” isn’t even logical. Yes, I understand how the breakup means feelings of low self worth which will then topple into feeling bad about other things. But why has my brain been wired to think this way? Why does it seem so easy for everyone else to function normally with life but not me? Honestly this is the first time in my life where I’m dedicated to focusing on myself and learning more about myself instead of others in my life and it’s a very odd and bizarre feeling. I’m excited of course, but I’m also scared. My ocd makes me ruminate like “what if I will never make the most of this life I’ve been given”, “what if I truly have no worth and the most I will ever be in other people’s lives is a background character”, “why do I care if I’m a background character or not? I should feel guilty and ignorant for assuming everyone will automatically like me”, “are people lying to me when they call me pretty, smart or kind?”, “I need to look and sound perfect in both pictures, videos and in real life. I will never be satisfied for accepting who I am now”, and a bunch of other annoying questions. But sometimes it’s like I just can’t take the reality for what it is but at the same time, but I also acknowledge that I know this is ocd talking. This is so, so difficult. Do I make any sense with what I’m saying? Can anyone help?
- Date posted
- 20w
I am at the point where I feel like I don’t even know myself anymore and have a really hard time explaining my thoughts and feelings. The thought that no one may ever be able to help me or understand me is blazing constant in my head. I don’t know if I will truly ever be happy, the dissatisfaction I have in my life is beyond words and I try to be happy but my mind is so toxic and ungrateful. I feel that I may never understand myself. Have been dealing with extreme intrusive thoughts in regards to my relationship, if my partner is for me, if I am the reason problems come up in my relationship, if I am overly sensitive causing arguments etc. I will have constant thoughts about other people in my head although I have a partner. A hyperactive imagination of others if you will or specific individuals in my life. I have a severely low sex drive. I have also noticed recently that my partner will say things that I don’t like but can’t tell if he’s the problem or if i’m the problem. If I like my partner anymore or if I don’t, can I see him in my future or not. When I am with him I enjoy being with him but there is always a thought in the back of my head of do I just like being around him as a friend because I am lonely or if I truly love them. It’s to the point where I question leaving them or not. My only issue is that I don’t want to leave but at the same time I have trouble feeling emotionally and sexually connected. I even pick at physical imperfections that they may have which to my true beliefs does not matter I will love them otherwise. We recently have been arguing a lot and I can’t tell if I am the problem or he is but it causes me a lot of stress because I feel misunderstood and feel like he wouldn’t understand me unless he was me. It can be hard explaining OCD to him because he is one of those people who loves to self help almost like a life coach, explains to me that anxiety doesn’t exist and that I can help myself or stuff along those lines. It hurts so bad because he doesn’t understand how hard it is for someone with OCD and how him saying things like that only makes it worse and makes me want to turn away from him in a way. I want to feel like I can talk to my partner and that I know for a fact is my true belief. I pray that God will heal me of this terrible disease. I feel I have turned away from the Lord so much because of how alone and misunderstood I feel with what feels like no change. When I’m in public I’ll look at a guy and feel as though because they looked at me back they will think I like them or that I may be interested even though i’m not. I obsess in my head sometimes about real people I know that are kit my partner and have just learned to accept that but it’s still disheartening to me. I understand the concept of being with a partner and still finding other people attractive without obviously doing anything about it and I try to remind myself of that. Please someone tell me this is OCD because the thought of it not is sickening. Another thing I do is compare myself to other girls my age almost that if i’m not as pretty as them im not pretty at all. To whom ever reads this please be very mindful of how you respond because I am triggered very easily. But I am so so lost.
- Date posted
- 16w
I ruin every single relationship that I'm in with my OCD I admit every single thing I do even when it really isn't a big deal ,if I don't admit I feel unbearable anxiety and I don't know what to do about it , I'm always on edge worried I've done something wrong always searching my mind and actions for a slip up it's exhausting I keep spiralling wondering if I will ever actually be with someone and be able to have a happy and healthy relationship Please tell me I'm not alone I don't know what else to do
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