so when i was younger i was sexually abused by my neighbor and his dad. i’ve always been afraid of dating after because i’m just scared all guys are liek that. do you guys think this could possibly be a cause of the HOCD?

100% my father has been the cause of my OCD because of the abuse he has given me.. as well as my abusive ex boyfriend who wanted me to like women and only like him so he didn't feel jealous (I know he was ridiculous!)

oh my gosh i’m so sorry! that’s so shitty. do you stuggle with HOCD also?

Im so sorry that happened to you. I was also abused as a child and in a lot of abusive relationships growing up and yes i beleive it can be part of why hocd can hook in so tight. I was afraid of sex my whole life and sex repulsed because of it so it can be very scary when people assume that could be because of your sexuality and not underlying trauma.

I used it! When I got with my boyfriend I was terrified that I like women... I know recovered mostly because of how accepting he has been he didn't require answers just kept continuing our relationship because he knew that it wasn't me (I kept telling him I don't want to be those things that I was scared of) and now I know what is real. I did it by ignoring the thoughts, by literally not caring.. it's so hard at first but when you do it.. you'll feel so so much better I know it is difficult and don't feel bad if you can't right away.. but please try whenever you can !

i’m so sorry that happened oh my god! and yeah i also want a boyfriend but i’m just so scared because i know every guy isn’t like that but i feel like they are and i hate it. i’ve fucked up some good relationships in the past but i just get scared ya know? and that just gets me thinking maybe your scared because your actually gay and it’s a cover up and that’s when i start to feel numb like just not in my body i know it sounds crazy but it just makes me feel so shitty and anxious and i hate it

I have a fear of men because of the abuse. I still love my boyfriend. This fear doesn't mean you are gay don't worry! It means you need help about feeling more comfortable around males. When you say "I know it sounds crazy" you admitted yourself that you know it isn't real, you know it is crazy that those two things aren't linked. It is a fear, it's not us. Our abuse doesn't make us, it gives us mental problems but we can get through it. Don't believe the OCD it is a bully!