- Username
- BigAl15
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Yea I’ve felt that way but a joke is a joke and we can’t take life so seriously. That would be boring.
I knowwwww but I feel so guilty and my compulsion is to confess it to my husband EVERY TIME
@BigAl15 You need to stop doing that. I have the confession thing too. It becomes a never ending cycle and it’s going to push them away. They don’t need to know everything.
I frequently review past things that I’ve said ( jokes included) on loop. I’m learning that my brain is trying desperately to protect me in these moments - but it’s a bit misguided. I’m still learning how to cope - but distraction through body movement tends to relieve some discomfort for me (e.g. yoga or even mindful stretching). Also, writing out affirmations can feel helpful. I’m sorry you’re experiencing this and I hope you feel some relief soon✨
I constantly review things in my head. I analyze every little thing I said and did. Its worse if I'm with someone I don't know very well. I constantly think "I shouldn't have said that. I bet they were offended by that. I bet that really hurt their feelings." I have friends who have literally told me "Stop apologizing. You didn't say anything wrong." The crazy part is that I do this even with friends that I know I can say pretty much anything I want. Sometimes I will do both. I will apologize and then ask if their feelings are hurt or if they are offended. They will give me a look like "What are you talking about? And then say "No." I'm trying to break this habit. But I've lived with OCD since I was 8 and didn't know it until last month. So its a deeply engrained habit.
So recently me and my friend got into a huge fight and they brought up how I always made them uncomfortable, I didn't realize that then and I would always joke about things without realizing it might have affect on people because I was joking and now that I'm thinking about it I feel disgusting, I feel like I molested them without having the intention to molest them(??). I wish I really knew sooner and that this would never happen. Maybe I am a monster I don't know.
Guys im so embarassed. And OCD makes it so much worse because it's giving me chronic guilt. I was at work and I made a joke about unaliving myself with a friend like really loud and I feel really guilty because it just kinda came out. My friends were laughing but I realize by some ppls reactions that mightve not been appropriate. I wasn't serious but I do make those jokes often with friends (unfortunate habit I've picked up due to my own s*icidality). My guilt is killing me and I have a strong urge to apologize to my coworkers. Should I or is it a compulsion and I should just leave it alone??
Does anyone else feel like they are walking on eggshells being super careful about every interaction with anyone but their partner? I feel like I have to monitor what I say/how I react if I ever have an interaction with someone of the opposite gender who isn’t my partner. For example, I end up feeling so guilty for finding another person of opposite gender funny? And my brain attacks me and says I should only find my partner the funniest. And when I’m not currently ruminating/ doing a compulsion I can literally FEEL it searching for something to latch onto and it’s so exhausting
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