Today my partner is being very distant, and i'm really scared that he want to leave me, or that he doesn't love me anymore, maby he found someone else. He told me that he studied (i didn't ask nothing) and now he is going to work. He bearly text me back, and never call. I already been in this situation and i always kept asking for reassurances. But at the end people always broke up with me; in the exact moment and I start to think that it is just me convincing myself. I always take that as a confirmation of my doubts. So now a part of me is screaming for help. Is this intuition or is just ocd? (In other words, things tomorrow can be better If I dump my thoughts or nothing will change so it is better to run away by myself today?) Anyway I'm really proud of myself; because although everything, I didn't ask confirmations or reassurances to him! I also kept my doubts for myself (and this app) BUT I DID NOT TELL NOTHING to my boyfriend. It is the fist day that I am able to do it!

I try to remember that just because we're not having a good time right now, that that doesn't mean he won't make me feel good tomorrow or the next day!

Remember that ROCD can create a self fulfilling prophecy. What this means is that, the more you seek reassurance, accuse your partner for cheating, use them for your own happiness, the more they will feel this and be put off and thus, distance themselves. When the ROCD compulsions become extreme and a person acts on these all the time, it can become exhausting for the other partner and the other partner may choose to leave due to the fact they are sick of it and can’t deal with it anymore. I’ve seen this happen in many cases. In your situation, we don’t know why he is distant. He could be going through stress, he could be busy with an event or work. It could be anything. When we have low self esteem/anxious attachment or ROCD. We will take any subtle change in behaviour from our partner as an indication of abandonment. We take it personally. We think the reason for their distance is because of us. THIS IS NOT THE CASE. Unless you are constantly accusing them or seeking reassurance, then I highly doubt their distance is because of you. This is why it is so important to build up our self worth, believe that we are worthy of our partners love and to reassure ourselves instead of seeking it outside of ourselves. You are doing such a great job so far from refraining from acting on compulsions as I saw in your previous posts. Trust me when I say this, I GET IT, I KNOW just how agonizing it it to see your partner distancing himself. You have to face this feeling it brings and sit with it, do not react, I repeat, do not react. Sit with it. YOU CAN COPE. nothing is ever uncomfortable enough for you to cope with. It is simply a feeling that can be managed by you if you let it pass by.

Well done!!! I’m sooo so sooo proud of you for not asking for reassurance! This is extremely difficult to do but you did it! Auguri!!

What has happened here is this. Situation: your partner seems to be more distant than usual Thoughts: oh no, he is going to leave me Are these thoughts fact or opinion/perspective? What other perspectives are there? *he could be busy with work *he might be feeling ill *maybe there is a family conflict *maybe his friend is going through something and he is helping him *maybe he too is going through some mental health issues Etc etc

No my rocd was right; today he said that he don't see anymore a future with me

but he also said that he want to keep date and everything but without being my boyfriend

I'm confused as fuck now

It’s not confusing. He’s telling you straight up he wants to see other women