- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
If you love her you can choose her!I know the OCD feels really really real, but it is not you. If you love her, choose her.
- Date posted
- 3y
I want to choose her but how can I if this is nagging at me all the time. The worst part is it feels like it’s always been there but now it’s just getting stronger and stronger. Idk
- Date posted
- 3y
@BradOCD Have you shared your struggle with her at all? I was feeling exactly the same way, but I told my fiancé what I was going through and letting that wall down was really helpful. It’s also scary! But not going through it alone (while in a relationship) is such a big help.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
I totally understand - that's really a horrible feeling but just try best as you can to sit with how uncomfortable it all feels. and remember - OCD is OCD, don't get bogged down in content - when I'm staring at a tap that I know is off and I'm trying to leave my house, the tap is not the problem, OCD is the problem. :) The thoughts are not the problem, OCD is. Tell it "maybe" and try your best to carry on with your day regardless of whatever nonsense OCD is shouting :)
- Date posted
- 3y
But I feel really convinced now like it’s just who I am now!?!?
- Date posted
- 3y
Can ocd really do this to someone
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes
- Date posted
- 3y
@ocdman How can you be so sure
- Date posted
- 3y
@BradOCD Because I literally experience false attraction the attraction that I think I’m experiencing literally changes right before my eyes when I calm down
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
OCD is all about doubt and it attacks the things we love and care about the most- that's how it keeps us in its grip! So it makes sense in OCDs awful way that OCD would attack your relationship as it's clearly so dear to you. I'm so sorry you're going through this - it's really really difficult I know but try not to wish the thoughts away so much, try to say "yeah, whatever, maybe" and although that feels impossible the more you say maybe over time the easier things will be. :)
- Date posted
- 3y
When i calm down it just feels like I’m okay with it all? Like it makes it more confusing?
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
OCD can latch onto anything, even feeling calm "why do I feel calm now? Shouldn't I be anxious? What does this feeling of calm mean?!" This is OCD doing its thing once again. It's really tough but you've got this! ✨
- Date posted
- 3y
@Gnathalie Idk what to do! 😬every emotion I feel makes me feel bad
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
I have been doing okay for the past week or so and was really happy i felt that i was getting back on track, but today i went on tiktok and i saw something triggering which was “i thought i was a lesbian for 4 years until i met my now boyfriend” and it triggered me very badly, i have been crying all day and i can’t seem to make myself feel okay. i feel like im lying to myself that im not lesbian and i truly want men, but when i get any thought about men it feels disgusting and wrong and not me, i don’t want men i feel so sick i want to get out of this. i always felt so happy as a lesbian im so stuck i don’t want to be with a man. i have a loving girlfriend i just want to be happy with her.
- Date posted
- 25w
hi i’m a lesbian! and i have known im a lesbian for a really long time and i have a sweet girlfriend of 1 year. it all started when i saw this masc lesbian come out as straight, after that i had my guy friend over and he’s a sweet guy and he was flirting with me (he didn’t know i was gay) im not sure but i panicked and my brain froze and i was like “do i like him”, ever since my brain has been over worked 24/7 for 2 months now and it’s spiralling constantly. im trying to control it but all these thoughts are so disgusting and my brain tries to put him and i in scenarios that make me uncomfortable and i feel panic and i hate it. i have always been comfortable being a lesbian and i still am comfortable as a lesbian, but i dislike these thoughts i have about him and men and i want it to be over. i do not want to experiment with men even tho my brain is telling me i do, i find it disgusting and i dread it, i have a sweet girlfriend and i want to be with her forever, i do not imagine anything with any men and i hate these thoughts. im scared of becoming bisexual/straight one day and i hate hearing sexuality is fluid. its a whole mix of comphet and so-ocd
- Date posted
- 22w
First I want to start off with, as a kid, my brother touched me inappropriately, I watched him do the same with my cousin, than later on I did the same to my cousin. I feel great shame for it and I have yet to forgive myself. Now, since than 10 years later, I have always loved women, fantasized about women, constantly prayed to have one and do things to be with one 1 day. I struggled with porn a lot as a kid because I was shown it at such a young age. I remember first watching lesbian porn, than moving to guy and girl, than countdowns, etc. I was so hooked that it took an identity crisis to end this porn addiction. (I have only been sober for 3 weeks.) Now I only mention this because I think my porn addiction somewhat ruined me, same way as what I did in the past did. A year ago, I started to talk to a childhood crush I had, and things felt so great. We started to get along but I knew all I wanted to do was have sex and move on as wrong as that is. I ended up falling in love with her and asked her to be my girl. 9 months in, we were having constant arguments and she had this problem where she couldn’t give me a break. We were with each other 24/7 and it felt like dealing with a sister at some point. I remember talking to my friends and asking them what would they do and they always advised me to leave but I was not willing to because I knew I loved her and the way I was feeling was temporary and couples argue. Couple weeks in, I started to have these thoughts that we weren’t going to work out and that I no longer found her attractive. I kinda ignored them because it simply wasn’t true, I still found her attractive and would get hard ons for her yet, I still had this mindset that, “Oh, there’s other hotter girls” and, “Your ex looked so much better.” and I couldn’t stop these thoughts. One day I randomly woke up and remembered what I did as a kid, my whole world felt like it flipped. The thoughts were now, “what if you don’t like her because you’re secretly gay?”. I first laughed at the thought because of how ridiculous it sounded, but than it just kept going. Two weeks from a cycle of unwanted thoughts (1st stage of my ocd), I finally got over the thought with simple toughness and determination, I did lots of research on what was going on with me and went with the, “thoughts are just thoughts” method. I was doing well until we watch a netflix documentary “American Murder: Gabby Petito” and all of a sudden my mind began to think, “What if I’m secretly a psychopath and want to kill my gf?”. For about a week straight, It’s all I was able to think about. It scared me so much and I didn’t know what to do. I started to get urges to KILL my gf. I didn’t know what to do so I left the room and crawled up in a ball, crying to god asking for help.These thoughts went away but were quickly replaced by, “You want to kill your gf because you’re just gay”. This sent me into such great panic, I couldn’t eat for days and couldn’t feel anything but anxiety. Days went by and I finally went to a doctor, at first I started to feel better as If I was getting help and things were going to be okay. The thoughts went away again as I began to start doing more things and get out of my room (head). I felt like I was back again, I was able to love my gf, I started to go to church, I felt that god was real and than boom. Here I am again and this time things have gotten really bad. I can’t stop “checking”. As soon as I wake up I check if my gf is “good” enough for me. I check my past and see if I have ever done anything that show signs of being gay. I check out other girls and guys to see whether or not I like one or the other. Even when I accepted the possibility that maybe I am just gay, my mind will fight me and tell me that I’m more than just gay. Truth is, I don’t know anymore. I’ve always loved girls and my gf. I don’t know if this is OCD anymore but I wish for my old life again. I’ve always been so proud of my sexuality and loved everything about it. I never been homophobic but gay stuff does make me uncomfortable. Each day feels like I lost another part of me. I feel like I can’t live like this anymore. I lost all my belief in god, my morals and value feel so weak, and my life is no longer a fun enjoyable thing to look forward to. I need help.
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