- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Hi, I’ve struggled with this too. I’m a Christian, and have struggled with Spiritual OCD as well. The Bible says that “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9 ESV Confess it, know God forgives you, and then forgive yourself. There is hope. He doesn’t see sin anymore since Jesus Christ died for your sin and rose from the dead. There is hope in God. I really hope this helps!
- Date posted
- 3y
My fear is what if the messiah is not real? What if there is just God and the messiah hasn’t arrived yet. In that case I’m going to hell because what I did is listed as one of the worst sins punishable by death according to God in the first testament. 🥺💔
- Date posted
- 3y
Aw, that's heartbreaking. I know your whole situation been there too. Just do this - if you even wish you were sorry about it (despite feelings and despite OCD saying "but what if I'm not sorry" garbage) then rest assured you are forgiven. Try to keep doing nice things for yourself/hobbies and you will see over time you won't think about it so much. I struggle with personal forgiveness too and find the best way is to no longer attempt to reason it out. Trust that God forgives you!! Not because of what prayers or compulsions you did to "make" him forgive you but just because forgiving is what he does as a daddy. God knows all about OCD! He loves you so crazy much!!
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you 🥺 Truth is I AM sorry. More than anything in the world. A lot of times I wish I could have a near death experience just so I can see him face to face and say I’m sorry. I say it but it doesn’t feel like he fogives me. I read this quote that says “Before the sin The devil tries to convince you that there is no reprocusion. And after the sin The devil tries to convince you that you can not be forgiven.”
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you BOTH for commenting it actually helps me 🥺😭💗
- Date posted
- 3y
Focus on what you love. Let God handle it. You are totally forgiven despite what your OCD says!!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
My OCD is awful when it comes to intrusive thoughts, and I also have BPD. I’ve never acted on the intrusions in harmful ways before—I’ve always found ways to manage them that are healthy and safe. But I got quite drunk during a psychiatric episode (I wasn’t fully aware I was in one at the time), and I acted on an intrusive thought in a way that wasn’t healthy or very safe. That’s the best way I can put it. I’m so ashamed and overwhelmed with guilt. I didn’t physically harm anyone or anything, but what I did was enough that it’s been eating me alive and has severely heightened my mental state. I’ve tried using my usual coping skills, I reached out to 988 and other crisis lines, I even texted AI chats. But I’m too scared to tell my regular therapist or psychiatrist. I’m currently on a leave of absence from work because I was already in a crisis state, and now I just don’t know what to do. I tried looking for articles or videos from people who’ve acted on intrusive thoughts, but everything says things like “people with OCD never act on them” or “intrusive thoughts are harmless,” and while those can be reassuring in general, I did act on one. Not being able to find any resources or support for this makes me feel even worse. That’s a big reason why I downloaded this app.
- Date posted
- 16w
Hi everyone, This is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to write. I’ve struggled with POCD for a while — intrusive thoughts that go against everything I believe in. I’ve never acted on them before. I’ve always been terrified of them and done everything to avoid them. But something happened the other night that I can’t stop replaying, and it’s tearing me apart. I was in that in-between state — not fully asleep, not fully awake. I was dreaming that something was “okay,” and in that moment, I moved my child’s hand toward me in a way I now feel completely ashamed of. I wasn’t aware of fully choosing it, but I remember it. I remember that it felt like I was following the dream, like my brain said it was okay. And the part I can’t stop obsessing over — that’s destroying me — is that in the dream, my child said, “no.” That moment makes me feel like the worst human being on the planet. I don’t know if he said it out loud or if it was part of the dream. But it felt real, and now I feel broken. I love my child more than anything. The fact that this happened — even in a foggy, dreamlike state — makes me feel like I crossed an unforgivable line. I’m not here to excuse it. I’m not here to get reassurance that it didn’t happen. I’m just trying to find someone — anyone — who has experienced something like this. Acting or moving in a way during sleep or semi-consciousness that your waking self would never do. I don’t know how to live with this guilt. I feel sick, ashamed, and like I’ve ruined everything. Please be kind. I’ve never felt more alone in my life, and I don’t know how to move forward from this.
- Date posted
- 8w
As a teenager and in other ways up until age 21, I was just an absolutely horrible person. It wasn't just a one time event that I regret, it was a lifestyle. I was a hedonist and a narcissist to an unbelievable degree and didn't even realize it. I read people's stories on here related to their real events and I just feel that I've done so much worse so it fuels this feeling that I'm unredeemable. And again it's not like I just made "one mistake." I was living under such a cloud of self-delusion and non-confrontation that I couldn't even embrace that what I was doing was wrong. Something pulled me out of that one night and I was forced to confront my actions (I believe it was God) but I've been living in this hell that is obsession ever since. I'm so guilty and ashamed and I'm desperate to find redemption. I can't forgive myself and I can't understand why I was the way I was or how on earth I even covered up what I was doing from others and even from myself mentally. I would just put a veil in my mind and not even think it was an issue. It's more likely than not that I am what I fear I am, so I guess trying to unconditionally accept the possibility of being what I fear is the only real way through this. Realistically I deserve all the suffering I'm receiving but I realize I can't have that mindset if I'm to have any hope of recovery. This is unbelievably isolating and I can't talk to anyone because of the risks involved. All I can do is try to limit compulsions, try to (somehow) accept the possibility of the worst case scenario and do my best to serve others.
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