Can someone please respond to this.. Has anyone ever acted on a thought? I have and I believe it to be a horrible sin, as it is mentioned as one. How do I forgive myself? It is a really weird thing because when it happened I was in such a dark place. I honest to God should have been locked up. I had been self harming and attempted suicide around this time too. I had expressed to my mother how mentally unwell I was and she didn’t take it seriously at all. I don’t want to blame her but I know for a fact if I was taken seriously it wouldn’t have happened. My mind was screaming at me to do things all day long in a way I can’t even explain. My ocd is still with me every day but 9-10 years ago when this was happening it was BAD. I Didn’t have thoughts of my own. Only ocd. Id take sleeping pills to keep myself asleep and id have dreams of doing bad things. So I convinced myself I needed to see if I enjoyed it so I did it to see. Turns out nope. Didn’t like it it was just ocd. And that sin has cost me my mental sanity and love for myself. If anyone has gone through this how did you forgive yourself? Do you think god will forgive you? I know I’m not supposed to ask these things but despite what it says I actually get peace from reassurance. And I know I’m not the only one.

I’m really struggling with something related to me ocd, and I would appreciate kind and supportive advice. If you can’t relate or don’t think anything you have to say would be helpful, I kindly ask pls refrain from commenting this is a really sensitive topic for me. Recently, I’ve noticed a pattern that feels something extremely new and distressing. The first time it happened I remember telling myself before self pleasuring that I am in control no matter what thought comes into my mind because I wanted to prove to myself that these thoughts are just from OCD and I know who I am and an intrusive that came out of no where, and i suddenly felt an intense fear that I was acting on it. In the moment I genuinely felt like I did. And afterword, I panicked and started questioning myself. This SAME FEELING has happened three times in a row each time, the intrusive thought was unwanted and random, and completely against my morals most recently it involved pocd and it feels even worse because it generally felt like I acted on it the thought in the moment while I was self pleasuring the panic doesn’t hit until afterwards when I stop :/ I start thinking that maybe I generally made a mistake and I’m now just realizing that it’s wrong because it generally feels like that :( but when I actually think about it again goes against my morals and values doesn’t make sense it feels incredibly real, and I can’t seem to shake this feeling off that I may have acted on it I’m terrified because I never wanted these thoughts in the first place. And I definitely didn’t choose them. If I had known, I would’ve had these intrusive thoughts I wouldn’t have self pleasured in the first place but it’s extremely hard to convince myself that this may be OCD because I feel like I have no other reason to believe that I didn’t act on it :/

I’m sharing this bc I need advice or even support from anyone who can relate. If you can’t relate and don’t think you’ll say anything helpful or kind pls don’t comment anything… I’ve been struggling with somethings that’s making me question myself. There has been moments while self pleasuring when I get intrusive thoughts, in those moments it feels like I’m enjoying or even self pleasuring myself bc of the thought. Right after I immediately have an anxiety attack and my HEART drops bc it feels terrible I feel like a disgusting monster :( ppl have told me I haven’t done a bad bc of how intense my guilt and panic are but I keep thinking that MAYBE I made a horrible decision in the moment and the guilt is just realising that it’s just wrong this doesn’t make sense to me because I’ve always told myself that I would never act on this in 1 million years and I’ve been known that these things are wrong so I’m just like constantly questioning myself these feelings and exact same situation has happened two times already I even promised myself that I wouldn’t act on anything beforehand and yeah, I still felt like I did act on my thought during my alone time I’m genuinely convinced that I’m a horrible and it’s even got into the point where I don’t wanna be here anymore and I don’t even think this is my OCD :( tbh

Does anyone feel like god didn't forgive them even after confessing? Doing alot of sins and confessed but still have this fear of thoughts telling you you had so bad Thoughts about him and that you don't deserve to be forgiven? Or it's too late? And anything religious triggers you?