My current theme is mostly about body movements/actions because I came far to know that my thoughts don't matter as they're just in my head. So I guess it's ocd tricking me. But I can't do this. It interrupts every thing I value. I started liking this guy and had been having themes related to him. Last one I had, i had a theme related to my brother and I I literally thought to myslef well at least it's not related to that guy. Which just shows how I don't want to have him in this whole ocd thing! A while later maybe less than an hour, I was scrolling through my phone as I was in the bathroom. I was thinking about that boy. Then I started swinging while being on the bathroom seat and I panicked and thought stop doing it and I thought but i wanna do it and i panicked. Then seconds later I was questioning what did I even think about while swinging? What was the thought that made me panic? I had a similar theme related to this before so I'm guessing it linked to it. Now my brain is trying to convince me that my thought was about that guy and my brother as my brother goes to that bathroom too. I just don't want to explain more as I didn't say more details but all I can say is I'm freaking out right now.

Username: Freemeofocd

Date posted: 326d ago

Omg this!!! This right here. I just explained this to my therapist the other day. The thoughts don’t bother me at all anymore. I’m okay with thoughts being thoughts. So now my ocd tries to intertwine my thoughts with actions. I’m accepting of thoughts and feelings so my ocd is trying to take the one thing that separates me from being what I fear and that’s ACTION. I will be doing something and have a thought Mid action and I will continue the action, and then I will be distressed and confused about the motive and intention behind my action because of the thought. It’s VERY distressing, you are not alone. I totalllltyyy understand this and I feel like it’s not talked about enough.

Username: not_me

Date posted: 326d ago

You have no idea how this helped I'll literally be in tears rn. I'm just scared that what if I had the thought before doing the action then I did it with the thought yk.

Username: Anonymous_234

Date posted: 326d ago

this just explained everything!😭

Username: Anonymous_234

Date posted: 326d ago

@not_me ocd is such a damn bully. i pray one day we’ll all be able to live our lives happy again🥺😞

Username: LydiaK

Date posted: 326d ago

Take a deep breath first, you're currently under the influence of the panic attack that makes you ocd thoughts appear "bigger" than they actually are. It just ocd using it's special technic now that it found the chance in order to control you. Drink some warm water, keep on inhaling and exhaling slowly. Say to yourself that I'm going to deal with these thoughts later.