- Date posted
- 3y ago
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Hey! You are doing an awesome job. I am working with the same themes. Ultimately by not doing the exposures you are avoiding and yes it can feel awful the fact you have to do them but I got to the point where I just thought, I feel crap regardless, let’s go for the exposures whole heartedly multiple times a day from now on and see what happens. No one wants to do exposures and of course it makes us all feel bad and low. It is awful. To help with the hopelessness I have been working on making sure I live my life to the fullest, meeting up with friends, always going in to work and doing some form of exercise. I know it is hard to get the motivation but it has certainly helped me. It does get easier just keep trying a little bit each day.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Thanks Tom; I do my best to try to live my life regardless of the OCD but I just get scared that I'll ruin it somehow. It' good to know that others experience a similar thing but are still able to have a fulfilling life :)
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Hey tuxie, I'm so sorry you're struggling with this. And I'm glad you felt able to come here for help. I haven't experienced Suicidal OCD, but I have definitely had anxieties that doing my exposures could make me worse. For me it was health anxiety around my chronic illnesses--that if I exposed myself to certain things, my physical health would get worse, and if I didn't, my OCD would get worse. The best thing I can suggest is to trust in the process and do the exposure anyway, even if your OCD keeps coming up with reasons you should avoid it. If you're doing these exposures with a therapist, I would also check in with them about these fears. Apart from that, I think Tom made a really good suggestion, and that's to counterbalance the hopelessness you're sitting with during exposures with lighter, more fulfilling things in the rest of your life. You're doing really hard work right now and sitting with some really scary things, so if you can, make some extra space for self-care and activities that give you a sense of meaning. Exposures are hard, and they're necessary, but that doesn't mean the rest of your life can't be a little more soft. I hope this helps. Much compassion. <3
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Hey, thank you for your response - I'm very early on in the treatment process so I guess these are probably fears that a lot of us have had at some point!
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I an proud that you are starting to do the exposures and I feel you. I have just started with a therapist and also have suicidal ocd, just reading about these kind of exposures triggers me and scares me. I hope I can get to a point of doing them and eventually feeling better. I know you can too! We can do this!
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y ago
You could try put that worry of ruining it in to one of your exposures and work with it.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w ago
Happy Tuesday friends. Question for you all: I have recently started ERP therapy (about one month ago) and I feel in a way it has helped. But I also notice that I feel the thoughts I do have are SO intense that I feel like I’m gonna explode and then I’ll cry and get upset but then feel better after having a “freak out”. Does this happen to any of you guys? Also, I told my therapist yesterday some of the exposures we had been doing made me uncomfortable. Like really really uncomfortable. She made me feel a little bad about not doing it and stated this would prolong my progress if I didn’t do it. I’m not sure if I should push my self to do this exposure because she told me to or to stick up for myself and move at my own pace. Thanks everyone.
- Date posted
- 23w ago
i would like some advice please and i didn't get any responses 😭.. apologies for reposting but just need some thoughts on this 🥲 //// after frustrations with erp not working, i intentionally brought up the intrusive mental images as well as sensations during an exposure in trying to practice desensitizing myself to them. but now im scared that me purposefully bringing on the images and especially the disturbing outward sensations means that i did something bad or acted on my thought since i took the action to purposefully create and bring the disturbing intrusive images and thoughts and feelings. now it feels like not just a fear but reality. and my anxiety levels are just too much. i'm just feeling terrible and would like some thoughts or support
- Date posted
- 20w ago
I'm reaching out in hopes of finding others who might relate to my experiences or offer insights. I'm dealing with a complex interplay of OCD, depression, and existential anxiety, and I'm struggling to make sense of it all. Here's what I'm experiencing: I have OCD with various manifestations, along with episodes of depression. I find myself in a cyclical pattern where, after a few weeks, I start to remind myself about my depressive tendencies. This reminder seems to trigger a cycle that actually makes me feel more depressed or at least more aware of depressive symptoms. When this happens, I often experience feelings of nihilism and existential dread. I try to think about my family - my two young boys and my wife - to find motivation or a sense of purpose, but this strategy often backfires, making me feel even more anxious and depressed. I constantly check my feelings, wondering if they're depressive or anxious. At the same time, I fear that my feelings of anxiety and panic might spiral out of control. I think about my emotions and thoughts on a meta-level, which means I'm not just experiencing feelings, but I'm also constantly analyzing the fact that I'm experiencing them. There's an existential component to my struggles, a fear of depression and anxiety itself, and a sense that this might be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Perhaps most frustratingly, I often have feelings, thoughts, or sensory experiences that I can't explain or put into words. I feel like I've never heard of these before, which leaves me feeling deeply misunderstood. Does anyone else experience something similar? How do you cope with this complex web of symptoms and experiences? I'm particularly interested in hearing from those who've found ways to break the cycle of meta-cognition and self-fulfilling anxiety. Any insights, shared experiences, or strategies would be deeply appreciated. Thank you for your time and understanding.
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