Bella???
- Date posted
- 6y
m.a.d.m.a.d.
- Date posted
- 6y
I definitely do, like a hyper-awareness of myself. How would you describe yours?
Bella???Bella???
- Date posted
- 6y
yeah kinda like that, it’s like intrusive low self esteem lol,, kinda like how i’m not seeing myself the way i want to and i’m annoying and not me but am if that makes any sort of sense ?
m.a.d.m.a.d.
- Date posted
- 6y
omg yes yes yes. I notice one bad thing about myself and my OCD latches onto that (like my weight or my laugh or my smile). And then it connects to my other themes (TOCD, HOCD). I also get intrusive images of girls that are ‘prettier’ than me and the thought that everyone sees me as gross.
Bella???Bella???
- Date posted
- 6y
yes omg!! with tocd it attacks that and says i’m insecure because i feel like a guy or because i’m trans :///
m.a.d.m.a.d.
- Date posted
- 6y
Me too! It’s like my OCD is trying to convince me that all of my problems are because I haven’t accepted that I’m trans, or gay (which is so unrealistic and stupid but feels so believable).
m.a.d.m.a.d.
- Date posted
- 6y
yep, my thoughts centre more on HOCD and feeling unattractive and masculine, but I know what you mean about images.. it’s like my brain latches on to anything that isn’t feminine and labels it as masculine (or that I’m a boy). But I know what you mean!! I get the thought that I’m not feminine enough to be a girl or desirable to a guy, so it must mean I want to be a boy and date girls (which the constant images of prettier girls just adds to).
m.a.d.m.a.d.
- Date posted
- 6y
Whenever you see/read about/watch a tv show with a couple, does your brain want you to analyze whether you feel more like the girl or the guy? Mine tries to convince me that I imagine things from the guys point of view so I must want to be a guy.
AuntieIzzyAuntieIzzy
- Date posted
- 6y
I do
Bella???Bella???
- Date posted
- 6y
100%! it tells me i’ll be happier if i just accept it, ughh. i know it isn’t true but my mind always says, when i feel uncomfortable or insecure, it’s because i’m suppressing being trans or that i don’t like being a girl. honestly it’s insufferable. i was actually pretty confident in myself before and liked myself but now i feel super annoying and just not good in general. do you get those annoying flashes or images of you as a trans person or as a gay person? makes me so unhappy and nervous
Bella???Bella???
- Date posted
- 6y
also i get annoying things like i can only relate to guys or i’m not good enough to be a girl??? like?? what?? lol
AuntieIzzyAuntieIzzy
- Date posted
- 6y
I do too
Bella???Bella???
- Date posted
- 6y
100%!! it’s like, i find certain types of guys really attentive but my mind is like, you want to BE like that and DO those things rather than finding them attractive. and totally!! i’m relieved that you can relate omg
Bella???Bella???
- Date posted
- 6y
attractive*
m.a.d.m.a.d.
- Date posted
- 6y
Mine does the exact same thing!! And it’s like my brain has created this masculine (or lesbian?) image of myself which makes it feel 1000x more real. It just always feels like the OCD wants ‘more’ and is never content until it literally makes me believe it.
Bella???Bella???
- Date posted
- 6y
exactly! it’s so frustrating
Related posts
Tireddd
- Date posted
- 25w
Worried and self-conscious all the time?
I don't know how to describe it, but when i walk down the street it's like I'm always very aware of whether people are looking at me or something, and i can feel some concern if some older men slightly look at me, if they are stalkers or they are watching me because of my butt, or other parts, and i tend to squeeze it or hide it, i get uncomfortable and want to leave quickly. This also makes me question whether i actually experienced something that i'm not remembering or that i have blocked, because i think my reactions and my fears are somewhat more strong and weird. It's weird, i used to objectify myself to get attention and that's where most of the bad actions i did come from, but now it's like i feel hypervigilant, besides being afraid of being terrible myself, i also worry about other people being like that. It's also like i want to have nothing sexual, to have an operation to remove my parts or something like that
marimallow
- Date posted
- 24w
Feeling “not ocd enough”
Does anyone struggle with feeling like their ocd issues are not ocd enough compared to other peoples ocd? Is this an ocd thought itself lol
Anonymous
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 22w
Doubts about self expression
This obsession is new, but feels so much more grounded and it’s so anxiety inducing. Since the ocd started I’ve lost my sense of self and confidence. I got soocd and it slowly turned into be doubting my identity on whether I want to identify or dress masculine or feminine. I don’t feel good in the clothes I would typically wear out before I’m constantly overanalyzing how I’m feeling , it makes me really anxious and like I’m preforming. So then I started doubting if I would rather dress masculine and it’s extremely anxiety inducing and idk if it’s the ocd now but it feels like that’s how I want to dress.. that’s not what I associated with at all before the ocd but now it feels like that’s what would make me feel fully confident and loose in the world, does anyone else experience this??
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