- Date posted
- 7y
- Date posted
- 7y
Yes very... bc all i want is the complete opposite. I literally just try accepting the thoughts. But even if I accept them they are still always there.
- Date posted
- 7y
Yes! In fact, yesterday I watched a movie with Lily James in it and I have always thought she was beautiful and I have aspired to be her, etc..but I had this thought that said “I would marry Lily James” and it felt so real. But then I let the thought come and even exposed myself by telling a few trusted friends “I only want to be with a man but I would marry Lily James” and then we joked about it all for a while. I’m trying so hard to not let every thought and feeling mean anything but gosh it’s so hard.
- Date posted
- 7y
Yes! I think the reality is that we have to try to accept that it’s okay to think the same sex is beautiful and to be willing to say things like “You know what, I actually would marry Lily James” but that means nothing because I only want to be with a man. In fact, the whole movie, I was looking at the main guy in the movie and dreaming about marrying him. These intrusive thoughts and feelings are so annoying but I’m holding out hope that this won’t control my life or each of your lives forever
- Date posted
- 7y
@Jen22 my brain always does this! As a kid I had a laptop and would look up pics of my fav celebrities when I was bored and I just found them pretty, but damn my brain is taking it as evidence and saying I was attracted to them.
- Date posted
- 7y
Yes, happened to me yesterday & i freaked out. I wish I knew how to fix it.
- Date posted
- 7y
This is the longest these thoughts have sit with me... in the past it was easier to brush em off. Idk why this is so hard.
- Date posted
- 7y
Honestly @Jen22 there are times when I find this stuff so hard and still so surprising with the amount of ways it tries to convince me!
- Date posted
- 7y
Passed two days my brain has been saying “your gay, just admit it”. “Just say it” like in these little voices! I have NEVER had a crush on a girl. EVER. I don’t get why I cant shut that voice off. Literally wish I had a switch!
- Date posted
- 7y
Hey @Sunshine1 I’m not sure what religion you follow (I’m a Christian) but I completely understand that pain and 100 percent relate to what you mean. If you ever want to talk privately through social media or text, let me know!
- Date posted
- 7y
In fact, if any of you want that, let me know! I would love to chat!
- Date posted
- 7y
Thanks @jen22 that means alot! ??
- Date posted
- 7y
Thank you @Jen22!
- Date posted
- 7y
yes all the time. it’s been happening to me all week and idk how to fix it. some days i can just ignore the thoughts and other days i have to give into the compulsions or i feel like i’m going crazy
- Date posted
- 7y
That happens to me all the time . All the time I worry “is this just gay realization?” And then my ocd goes crazy
- Date posted
- 7y
@Sunshine1 it’s so annoying isn’t it?
- Date posted
- 7y
Me too, accepting the thoughts only works so far but the thoughts are always there
- Date posted
- 7y
Yes my brain is always looking for proof & “disproof” if that makes sense!
- Date posted
- 7y
Life is crazy- i have always said God will never give you anything you cant handle- however why is God giving me this.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
Anyone else with HOCD get thoughts of like "people in denial try to distract themselves" or anything along those lines when just trying to move on from the thoughts. Having a pretty bad episode this morning at least anxiety wise.
- Date posted
- 11w
I’ve recovered from HOCD before and got my attraction and my usual actual identity back. I was recovered from end 2022- start 2025 until I got triggered UGHHH😭 My HOCD is REALLY trying to convince me and it’s SO annoying cause I genuinely don’t want these thoughts. I know I naturally like men and always have done so. I can’t wait for my first therapy session in two days Omg! I need your advice, not necessarily reassurance, but more advice? My HOCD is throwing random “proof” I did/ saw as a child in my face, which back then had no meaning in my life and I continued to live a perfectly heterosexual life. I’ve educated myself about arousal non concordance / child’s play, but it still doesn’t remove the HOCD. I’ve read therapists great explanations on how it’s not a sexuality issue, BUT ITS AN OCD BRAIN ISSUE. So basically I’ve been straight and i will die as straight. But my ocd is still continuing with the intrusive thoughts/flashbacks. I’ve had some moments where I haven’t done as many compulsions and had less anxiety but still had those damn thoughts and I DO NOT want those damn thoughts. I have so much proof and factual/logical explanations but HOCD is still continuing to thrive. I absolutely hate this and I feel so alone. I wish there was a reset button cause I don’t want these thoughts to happen. I want a man and I stand by that. How do y’all deal with these situations? Cause sitting with the thoughts is clearly not helping.
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- Date posted
- 5w
I really need help understanding what I’m going through. For a long time now, I’ve been struggling with thoughts and feelings about women that confuse and scare me. Sometimes I feel this strange emotional or mental ‘pull’ toward certain women — it’s not exactly sexual, and not clearly romantic either, but it feels like something, and it triggers deep anxiety. When I see a beautiful woman or a WLW (woman-loving-woman) couple, I feel something that I can’t explain — sometimes I think it’s just admiration or aesthetic appreciation, but OCD keeps telling me: “You felt something, so you must be gay,” or “You’re hiding something.” I get stuck in endless loops, trying to analyze these moments and label them. Even when I feel physical or emotional reactions, they don’t feel natural or aligned with who I am. They feel like a reaction to the idea of women, not real attraction. I try to be honest with myself — I even told a friend I might be bisexual at some point, just to test if that felt more comfortable. But it didn’t. It made things worse, and I felt like I lost touch with who I am. I don’t want to lie to myself or live in denial, but I’m exhausted. It feels like I’m being mentally forced to feel something that isn’t mine. I’m 14, and I understand that things might still be developing, but I can’t help feeling like I’ve always been drawn to men, and never naturally wanted women that way. Still, I keep doubting everything. Is this real attraction or OCD feeding false feelings and thoughts? Can OCD create emotional or mental sensations that feel like desire? I’m so scared that I’ll lose myself, or find out something I never wanted. I just want peace and to feel like myself again.
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