Struggling with guilt over intrusive thoughts and seeking therapy support.

Guilt

Hey friends, really rough day. I want to go to therapy but it feels like my therapists are afraid of me or don't understand me. They encourage me to just keep doing Exposure therapy but I know I'm not going to act on anything! I know I'm supposed to say "maybe maybe not" but that's not what's going on here! I feel guilty for THINKING these things! I opened up to a person the other day and they opened up about their anxiety and depression and wanted to tell them my struggles over the last 9 months but I know that my thoughts are gross and not real. I want to stop feeling guilt for my thoughts WITHOUT endorsing my thoughts. I can expose myself all I want, it doesn't make my thoughts good.

Username: jlxlzjlxlz

Date posted: 2y ago

these thoughts aren’t your fault. it can be saddening to feel like other people don’t understand. I am sure your therapists understands. You aren’t gross; you cannot help the thoughts you experience :)

Username: GSRGSR

Date posted: 2y ago

Bro it’s being human we have these thought and many people don’t even notice them. They brush them off. Since many people have ocd it made it noticeable and it’s tough. You are not alone I’m also having these thought as much disturbing and annoying it is you have to push forward. Just mess with them be damn sure that’s cool thanks for the thought and just move along your day there will be good and bad days keep moving forward!

Username: McDuckoMcDucko

Date posted: 2y ago

That first part really isn't good to hear. Is your therapist an OCD specialist? Even if so, you may need someone else because it sounds like you don't have a good bond. Sometimes it's best to just let the thought enter your mind and take no further action on it rather than replying with uncertainty. Tackling OCD takes a solid game plan and it doesn't sound like your therapist is helping you to outline what you need to do.

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 2y ago

They are an OCD expert but it feels like they deal with people who more afraid of acting on thoughts rather than those who feel guilty because of their thoughts. I could be wrong but that's what it feels like.

Username: McDuckoMcDucko

Date posted: 2y ago

@Anonymous They should really understand how rumination works in someone with OCD. I think that's rather unacceptable if that's how it actually is. How long have you seen them for?

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 2y ago

@yup_its_ocd I always want to give professionals the benifit of the doubt because it could be that I'm not communicating my anxieties properly. And also I stopped seeing them after two or three sessions. But, I'm outing myself, that was three months ago because they were giving wasn't very useful and because of the cost.

Username: redmuse22redmuse22

Date posted: 2y ago

I don't know if I understand your problem? ERP works for mental compulsions as well. Generally working on guilt/shame/disgust etc is similar to working on fear ime. You still do exposures so you learn to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. Or obviously practice accepting uncertainty when a "live" thought comes up naturally. It doesn't sound like you're doing ERP correctly if you think that it means endorsing your thoughts.

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 2y ago

That's fair, but when I asked my therapist about intrusive thoughts and the guilt that comes with it, he just brushed it off saying that I just have to keep doing exposures. I'm literally bed ridden right now because I've been unable to come to terms with my thoughts. I feel like I should be punished for my thoughts and I have this overwhelming compulsion to tell the people I'm closest with what's going on. But I'm terrified if they ever found out, they'd hate me. I know this is common. I know I must be willing to accept that I could be a horrible person. But I just remember how broken I am and it just hurts so much. I needed to rant. Thank you.

Username: redmuse22redmuse22

Date posted: 2y ago

@Anonymous Ah I see. Sorry, I thought this was more of an ask post than a vent post. That makes more sense. I don't think their general advice to you was bad, but the delivery and acknowledgement of the emotional component was lacking and that makes them an ok therapist vs a really really good one. Are in a place to try to see someone else?

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 2y ago

@redmuse22 That's the hope. It started off as most of these do with a question and turned into a vent. Thank you.

Username: GSRGSR

Date posted: 2y ago

No worries I hope you find it bro. Nothing last for ever trust…

Username: gray1

Date posted: 1y ago

Gave into a compulsion….

I had a really good day yesterday because I was able to manage my thoughts and identify them as intrusive. I had little to no anxiety and actually felt pretty stable throughout the day. Then, I went to sleep last night and had a triggering dream that I cheated on my girlfriend. I would never do that :( I hate these thoughts. If the thoughts involve my girlfriend, I feel like I have to tell her…..any advice on this? I ended up telling her and she said that I’m telling her to feel less guilty in the moment but at the expense of her feelings. This made me feel terrible 😞. The last thing I want to do is hurt her but I just feel like such a bad person having these thoughts. Please help if you have any advice 😕

Username: shannong165

Date posted: 1y ago

Opening Up to My Therapist about Intrusive Thought

Hi everyone, I decided to join this app because I believe I need more support when it comes to being open about intrusive thoughts and how scary it can be to share them. Yesterday I had a therapy appointment and I decided to open up with her about a recent panic attack I had that followed with intrusive thoughts. I rarely experience them now or can mitigate the anxiety that comes from them because I am on medication, but I thought I wouldn’t be judged and felt comfortable opening up about them to my therapist. Following after that, she began to ask mandated reporter questions and I became scared because she seemed to think I would act on the thoughts I’ve had. So despite me opening up with her about them I feel like I can no longer share because people who have never experienced them think i would act on the intrusive thoughts, when in reality I know I would never and have avoided people, places, and things because of them. Intrusive thoughts are debilitating and cause people to question who they are and go into complete panic! And I guess I’m just frustrated because though there are people who understand it’s still very weird for others and it just saddens me.

Username: chloexo

Date posted: 24w ago

Guilt

Hi, I currently really struggle with intrusive thoughts/images. How do I get past this horrible guilt feeling and urge to tell everyone? I just want to be happy but I feel like I’m drowning in guilt.

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Struggling with guilt over intrusive thoughts and seeking therapy support.

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