Help! Make the thoughts stop

I should probably give a bit of a back story 1st: I am a 41 y/o Momma of 4 absolutely beautiful kiddos ages 22(g), 18(b), 7(b), and 6(g) sadly that's going through a separation/divorce from their dad, and after 24 years together & 23 years married (2 separations of 2½years each in there which ended 10 years ago) I am having the worst time dealing with this. I need to find a way to make these days of watching me live out my entire life inmy head. I'm going over all the good and bad moments, mistakes & regrets replaying everything, even the life without him for years before we met & then during separations previously. So I've made a lot of bad choices and surprisingly have lived a very full life in such a short amount of time. I want all of the thoughts to stop and I need help. I have done meditation and all I can think of but now I'm in such a bad state of mind and my depression is so bad, my overthinking is so so so bad and i can't make it stop.

Username: Mau NLMau NL

Date posted: 2y ago

Ah dear i hear you. There is a lot going on and there is a lot on your plate. Seems like you are grieving and have feelings of guilt and shame, besides the sadness and feelings of emptiness that go along with such a traumatizing experience as a divorce (i know, i have been through it as well 10 yrs ago, not knowing then how central my rocd was in that process). I think the thoughts will not stop, especially if you fight against them. Maybe it helps if you try to accept them and try to let the feelings be there? Going through them in stead of around them? See this as an opportunity to come out stronger, no matter how long it takes. Please dont forget that divorce is really traumatizing and that the recovery that goes along with that takes time and clashes with your ocd. Its hard and i am with you, but this really is also an opportunity for self development.

Username: Mau NLMau NL

Date posted: 2y ago

Big hug, lots of love and take care

Username: LocnaLocna

Date posted: 2y ago

Don't revisit the past, all you'll find is regret. Given your circumstances lay out what you have to be thankful for. Grab a notepad, pen, a blanket, and maybe a coat. Go outside, set out your blanket and write all the things that you have to be proud of and joyous about. They can be future goals as well. Goals are the opposite of past. You said you'de messed up in the past. I'm sure by now you've worked out boundaries, guidelines, principles, standards, and ethical understandings to guide you, try to revisit these and keep the future in mind. It might be a good time to flex future possibilities. I'm a data engineer and I want to get more into the science field as it wasn't possible in the past, given my financial situation. I find joy in scientific method and much like love, I seek out that which brings joy.

Username: jinxikinsjinxikins

Date posted: 2y ago

I went through a similar divorce and have 2 kids. I was told to move forward one day at a time by making a daily list of things to do. Give yourself easy tasks to do and only a few difficult tasks. As you do something, as simple as showering, doing dishes, etc, check it off as done and at the end of the day make a list for tomorrow. Try to only think about today and if you start thinking about the past, tell yourself it's ok to grieve but only for a little bit at a time and go look at your list and pick something to do. Checking off things you're getting done helps you stay in the present.

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 39w ago

Always Thinking

I’m thinking thoughts 24/7, from wake to sleep, everyday, every moment. I don’t even get a one second break. It’s exhausting. What do I do? Is this normal? I want to be able to get out of my own head. I analyze and have thoughts about every action/event, every person, and every thought. And unfortunately there’s a set of traumas my brain makes me think about tons of times everyday. The only time I can stop thinking is when I’m super drunk (don’t worry, I’ve made sure to only do this like once or twice a month.) I’m not interested in trying medication, I’ve been on meds a few times and they never helped. Any advice?

Username: Mang0c@tto

Date posted: 38w ago

Help! Need advice :(

I don't know what to do or how to stop this : ( if anyone has advice please, please let me know! It's happening to me that whenever I watch/read TV at night, get into an argument with a loved one, or haven't talked to them for a while I start to have intrusive thoughts/images that they're gonna get fatally hurt. For example, about seven months ago I had a car accident. I don't think I was left necessarily traumatized, but rather every time I have (the previously mentioned) intrusive thoughts I begin to reimagine my loved ones in that same (or similar) situations... and no matter how much I try to NOT acknowledge them...they often lead me to having anxiety or panic attacks. The only way that I seem to be able to stop these intrusive thoughts is by sleeping it off… but then that leaves to lack of productivity throughout the day and affects my life… I try my best to not give in into compulsions…especially because I also have dermatillomania so I KNOW that if I DO give in…it’ll end up bad. I’ve tried writing things down to see if it helps to calm me down. Although that did work for a while, I’ve started to feel/think that if I write my thoughts down they’ll increase possibility of actually happening :( so I’ve stopped doing that for a while now. I don’t know what to do anymore!

Username: Godisgood777

Date posted: 37w ago

I need help asap

I struggled with severe ocd since I was in 2nd grade and now I’m turning 19 so I’ve had it basically my whole life, I’ve had it bc my dad abused my mom when I was little all the way up until I was a teenager and it really hurts me and affects my life. I have intrusive thoughts and images of loved ones getting hurt and I constantly overthink about my relationship and it got worst since I became a mother bc I ALWAYS worry about my daughter and I’m scared and it makes me panic I always think that if I listen to certain songs,take showers,get cute,put on certain clothes,or just take care of myself in general that something will happen and it makes my mental health worse and i have severe anxiety I struggled with pyschosis for 2 weeks and addiction to pills I don’t have money to get a therapist or even health insurance please help me how to stop it bc even when I try to let the thoughts pass through it hurts me and makes me freeze and not even be able to breathe bc of it and I can’t even say certain words bc I overthink that something will happen and it makes me want to take my life

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Help! Make the thoughts stop

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