How do you guys stop the rumination or get past the feeling of wanting to keep obsessing or thinking about the obsession? I feel like this is what is keeping my in the loop rn.
for me, although it's different for everyone, i had to realize my efforts to stop ruminating were really just making it harder to not ruminate. i was still trying to solve the "problem" of my rumination, which is how it started. trying to solve something. really, not ruminating is inaction. it's stepping off a mental treadmill. it should feel like exerting no effort, not even bracing yourself for the thoughts that might pop into your head. does that feel scary? then it'll probably work for you
Learn mindfulness, be aware of your mental decisions and where to put your focus. I highly recommen "The mindfulness workbook for OCD"/ Jon Hershfield, Corboy
Different for everyone I agree with @Estrid mindfullness can be vary helpful. Here a trick I use, when you start ruminating take a moment to sit with yourself close ur eyes and sink into what ur feeling in that moment. Observe the thoughts, acknowledge them and then tell them " your disturbing but you can stay around as long as you like but I'm not gonna try to figure this out right now" then just go about your day. Repeat this process as many times as you need thought they day but don't repeat the phrase compulsively. Just say it once and if the thoughts keep trying to lure you in just repeat it. Like setting boundaries with a four year old lol
To me reading about Metacognitive therapy helped a lot... they say we ruminate, because we have inner believes that "rumination will solve my problem", " if i do not worry about it, i am in danger" and simmilar... MCT therapy teaches you that there are other ways to think about your thoughts (metacognition - cognition is thought, thinking about thought is metacognition)... so check it out...generally they say your mind will heal when you stop using maladaptive thinking patterns (as rumination, in ocd compulsions etc), but first ypu must know these are maladaptive...you do them because inside uou believe these are helpfull - as compulsion, rumination...so first adress your believes about thoughts, emotions, urges, behaviour and then see bad strategies you use... and do good ones... in simple way I adressed my rumination that it doing more damage than good, never aolved anything so i decided it is maladaptive and seen that other thinking-behavorial patterns are more optimal, for example refocusing to your values and present moment (i learned it from ACT therapy) ... and thats how i reduced my rumination...everytime it comes I adress not a thoughts itself, but my false belief, that rumination lead to solution...it is false belief, so MCT do not bother with content of obsessive thoughts, it adress how you relate to them...if you wanna solve or accept...there is a difference...acceptance is a key and comittment to live your life despite fear...not be in false world of your mind, but here and now in real world...ocd lives only in mind...without attention ir is dead...lot of hope for you
Agree! MCT has helped me too.
@Estrid can you tell me more about your use of MCT? Do you had therapist online/offline, or learned it only trought books, seminars?
@drak4 No therapist, too expensive...I have read books, Pia Callesen "Live more, think less", articles and you tube videos also. Something that was easy but very helpful was to use "attention training techniques" on you tube. I have tried to implement this in my daily life in adfition to my ERP, ACT and mindfulness tools.
@Estrid great to know, thanks... yes attention traing in my exprience helps OCD a lot
@Estrid What yputube chanel? That book has poor reviews on amazon...but maybe people donr understanded it...it helped you?
@drak4 I know...maybe people don't understand, but life will for sure be easier if you apply the tools in it, not just for people with anxiety disorders. I borrowed it in the library. You can search for Michael Greenberg OCD, Adrian Wells, Attention training MCT. I don't have the links...
@Estrid I read book from Adrian Wells it was great, but very academic
@drak4 Yes, he is. Then you can check Greenberg.
How do you guys get past the anxiety? I feel like my thoughts are the only thing that control my mind. So often I feel like I should just leave my partner even tho I love them so much because I just feel like these thoughts are too much. I over analyze everything. I feel so stuck and defeated. I just want to be normal. I feel so toxic for the thoughts that I have
So maybe the title wasn't the best to to put it but when you guys start having obsessive thoughts how do you stop them before it turns into compulsions and anxiety?
I cannot for the life of me stop ruminating or checking how I feel about thoughts or focusing on thoughts or creating more thoughts. I feel like I’m losing my mind. I want to scream. I try not to ruminate about the thoughts, but trying not to just makes me think about them more. I try not to check, but somehow, I still check. I want to let a thought sit in the background, but the more I try not to focus on it, the more I end up focusing on it. I don’t want the thought to expand because that feels like engaging with it, but I can’t just stop it from expanding. It feels impossible. People keep saying I’m in control of my compulsions, and maybe that’s true for the physical ones. But when it comes to the mental compulsions, I swear I have no control. It feels like I’m missing something that everyone else seems to have, like there’s some tool they’re using that I don’t have. Controlling mental compulsions has never felt possible for me. I’m starting to fear them. And every time someone says I’m in control and can just choose not to do them, I end up beating myself up even more when they happen. Or when I *choose* I guess. I don’t know anymore. If this is my fault, if I’m responsible for this, then what does that make me? I feel like a monster. I am at my wits’ end. How am I supposed to control mental compulsions when it feels like they control me? I freak out when they happen. They don’t bring me relief, they just make me panic. I want it to stop so bad.
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