Did I just do a compulsion?

It feels dumb asking this as if I want it to be clarified to prove something, but I was on tiktok and saw something on tiktok (I don’t feel comfortable saying what) and I got a intrusive thought because of it. I wasn’t trying to let it bother me but I couldn’t just forget that that happened in my head. Why would something like that happen? Then I searched up “sexual obsessions POCD” on Google and the first site that showed up basically listed a lot of the stuff that’s been going on in my head. Then I started to feel better and relieved cause I was like “oh good it’s just ocd”. But it still makes me feel like it’s not…I hate this.

Username: JosieSimonsJosieSimons

Date posted: 1y ago

If I’m honest I’m unsure, because I’ve also determined research as a compulsion of mine so in my unprofessional opinion I’d say you did have a compulsion, and that’s alright. I am a massive hypochondriac so I research any time I feel even slightly off and I’m certain it’s related to my OCD. End of the day you’re healing and trying and that’s what matters. Thoughts are just thoughts, it’s how you react to them that matters

Username: JohnJonJohnJon

Date posted: 1y ago

You straight?

Username: ocdsufferer101ocdsufferer101

Date posted: 1y ago

@JohnJon What

Username: JenniesOCDBrainJenniesOCDBrain

Date posted: 1y ago

hey, i totally get how tough those moments can be, especially when something random like a tiktok triggers those intrusive thoughts. it's super rough when your brain just decides to throw that curveball at you, and even though my obsessions are more pure o flavored, that feeling of not being able to shake a thought? i'm right there with you. it's really brave of you to reach out and share what's going on, and i'm here to listen whenever you need to vent or talk it out. 🤗 i wanted to mention something my therapist told me about, it's a free ai ocd therapy tool called "unstuck" (www.AIOCDtool.com). considering the stuff you're dealing with, it could be a solid support for you. it's designed to help you when ocd starts feeling like too much, kinda like having a mini therapist in your pocket. you just type in what's bugging you and it guides you through, step-by-step, like an actual ocd therapist would with erp strategies. i'm not into promoting apps usually, but this one's been a real game-changer for me, and i genuinely think it could offer you some relief. not trying to be pushy, just wanna share something that's helped me out. if you've got any questions about it, feel free to hit me up. hope it helps you find some peace like it did for me. 💙

Username: letsgo

Date posted: 5y ago

Just went down a rabbit hole of googling a lot of stuff for almost 2 hours about pedophilia. And now I’ve got my self scared. I haven’t done it this bad in almost 2 months. I hate this. I was diagnosed with OCD, but some stuff I masturbated to a while back when I had a slight porn addiction is giving me proof. (Not actual children by the way) I’ve had OCD my whole life, and I’m starting to wonder if when I had thoughts about children before my huge spike if they were also intrusive, and I just didn’t care much about them then? Why would I just start caring now. I’m so broken.

POCD

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 5y ago

I used to have Harm OCD but ever since I watched that Black Mirror episode called “Shut Up and Dance” my obsession has been on POCD. For a long time I was petrified of typing “child porn” into google so I did a lot of avoiding. But then I started trying to get reassurance that nothing bad would pop up if you googled it anyway. I got so fed up with the thought that I ended up typing it in myself. I felt disgusted and guilty, and was naive enough to think I would at least no longer have to worry about typing that anymore. But then all these what ifs pooped up like “you didn’t check Bing, Twitter, Yahoo, etc”. So I ended up checking again to ensure myself that nothing would pop up. Then it got worse where I typed in some really disgusting things into google again because I just couldn’t handle the anxiety and uncertainty. I felt stupid every time and powerless. I managed to go about a week without checking but today an intrusive memory came back about a youtube link that had a questionable title in it when I google searched. So ended up going back and checked the video only to of course see that it was nothing horrible. I feel scared and paranoid. Like I have no control of myself. I hate this compulsion and I can’t love myself for doing all this. I’ve suffered from groinal responses and other sexual intrusive thoughts involving this theme but I just want someone to tell me I’m being paranoid. My mind won’t shut up about all this. It just wants me to keep checking and checking to make sure google is safe. How can I possibly love myself after all this? I don’t want this but the anxiety is unbearable and I can barely breathe. I didn’t think it would ever get this bad and it feels like even when I resist OCD wins anyway... or at least I hope it’s OCD.

POCD

Username: rachelb

Date posted: 5y ago

I don’t really know how to start this honestly. It may be long winded. I’m not sure that I have OCD, I’m not trying to take away any experience from anyone but I don’t know how else to explain when I obsess and feel consumed and disturbed by thoughts like this. I’ve been good for a while, thoughts have been at bay, I haven’t googled anything either or had any bodily responses/urges. But I saw something in the news today that brought it back up and disturbed me and I’m back in that headspace again if worrying I’m a danger or a freak or gross. I’m feeling alone in this, I don’t know how to talk about it, and I don’t know how to move through it.

POCD

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Did I just do a compulsion?

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