I have trouble feeling like I even love my partner. Like I see those OCD memes like ‘when I love my partner so much and I’m so in love but then have intrusive thoughts about our relationship’ I’m like … how do you even know you love your partner lol. I feel so identified with my intrusive thoughts I feel like they ARE the relationship, they ARE my feelings, and constantly feel that lack.
Love is a choice. Those feelings of “being in love” come and go.
@Youarenotyourthoughts I hear that! And then I also hear people saying like oh I’ve always been head over heels for my partner etc… maybe I just need to accept how much my ROCD has taken over? Bc it feels like often I don’t even like my partner!! And I avoid them!! Due to like emotional triggers of likely Compulsive checking if I like them, how they look, etc etc
@anxiouslyanxious I understand that and I have experienced a bit of the same myself but I would also advise against believing whatever people post online or say. We haven’t actually gone to their home and see how they live, interact. Maybe they are delusional, maybe life has yet not happened to them or maybe they are one of the blessed people who live where nothing goes wrong. I understand keeping in mind that we have OCD but I refuse to let it come in the way of what I want to do or how I want to live everyday.
remember that most OCD cycles revolve around things you care about or feel aren’t representative of your true self, *especially* pure OCD; so it makes sense why youre going through this cycle, because clearly this person is important to you in one way or another. right now, fear is taking you over and drowning out everything else, so it makes sense why you dont feel happiness or enjoyment with others, because your brain is screaming at you that theres DANGER and you need to GET AWAY, yknow?
i totally get where you're coming from, it sounds incredibly tough. feeling like your intrusive thoughts are taking over and questioning your feelings towards your partner can be so draining. you're not alone in this struggle, and it's okay to feel confused by those feelings. 💔 by the way, have you heard about this new AI-powered OCD therapy tool called 'unstuck'? when i was going through something similar, what really helped me was this free AI OCD therapy tool called "unstuck" (unstuckmyOCD.com/try) that my NOCD therapist recommended to me. i think it'll be especially helpful for you because it provides personalized step-by-step support when OCD gets difficult, just like an OCD therapist, especially in navigating feelings vs. intrusive thoughts in relationships. i hate when people promote stuff, but i really think it can help you because it's changed my life. lmk if you have Qs or just want to talk more! <3
I’ve had doubts my whole relationship with my boyfriend. Things like “you don’t find him attractive. You don’t think he’s funny. You’re lesbian because you don’t love him. You don’t love him at all. You think he’s annoying. You think his face looks weird. You want to be with other guys. He doesn’t make you happy.” But I always cry and get upset at the thought of losing him. Is that ocd, or something wrong with the relationship. It’s so hard to tell if this is Rocd or if this is one of those, “you never loved nor were interested in him in the first place.” Type things. I want to be interested and in love with him so bad, but I feel like all these thoughts get in the way. :( I don’t get that crazy “you love him so much,” feeing everyone talks about. Like yeah I know I feel for him and love him for who he is, but I don’t feel crazy deep in love :(
My relationship OCD has been severe lately and with seemingly no trigger to cause this flare up. I am constantly anxious, doubtful and panicked that I don't love my partner, overanalyzing whether or not I'm attracted to him, and ruminating on the numbness I feel when we are together. Every idea I can come up with to test and check to see if there's that love feeling, that attraction or interest/excitement in doing things together feels invalid, like it won't work. I get triggered further when my partner asks me if I'm okay, and that wave of panic comes back. I can't tell if this is OCD, or if it's my gut telling me it's not a relationship I should stay in. We've been together for five years, I'm not in OCD therapy, and I've been off meds for four months now.
Hi! Anyone dealing with SO OCD and have a partner? I am having the hardest time with this. The thoughts and feelings feel so real and scary but there’s moments where I have felt love and attraction for my boyfriend, but right now it feels so hard to believe that was true.
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