- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
Yes, absolutely. I'm in the same boat.
- Date posted
- 5y
Yes. And actually, I’ve had the same themes in practically the same order as you. You’re not alone! Can you find an OCD specialist to work with? I think you’ll see a lot more relief that way. For what it’s worth: every time I’ve accepted my intrusive thoughts as true, they’ve gone away. I accepted that I was gay, then I quickly realized I wasn’t. Right now I’m accepting that I’m trans. And the more I do it, the more I feel like a woman again. When it comes to ROCD, I once accepted that a relationship was wrong and broke up with him. Quickly after I could finally see/feel all that was right. Accept that you’re a lesbian! Not because you are, but because your intrusive thoughts only survive when you fight them. Whenever a trigger comes up that makes you feel gay: be gay! “Of course I just looked at that girl, after all, I am a lesbian in the closet. She’s so pretty! I’m glad I can accept that now.” And move on. “Believing” our thoughts often feels like the absolute last thing we want to do, especially because we convince ourselves that that’s the step that will make them finally “true”, but it’s actually a bizarre paradox that can actually free us.
- Date posted
- 5y
Omg I just tried your technique and it made me feel kind of normal again ? like the second I said "well obviously you're looking at her, it's cause your a lesbian" the idea that it was true was suddenly lifted. How can It be that simple??? Once you say that to yourself, is it normal that thoughts come back and make you anxious again? How long did this practise take you in order to actually feel normal again?
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you so much again! ♥️
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you so much for the insight! But I don't necessarily want to leave my boyfriend and out him through that hardship just because I'm "testing out my feelings". I want to be able to grow while still being in a secure and healthy relationship :) but thank you, I will try the accepting the thoughts as they are thing and see how it works. It's kind of scary to do ?
- Date posted
- 5y
I was definitely not suggesting you break up with him! I should have clarified that my approach in that case was a mistake but ultimately it stopped my ROCD theme. This was before I was diagnosed, so I still wasn’t sure what was going on or how to fix anything. I should have let the thoughts be without upending my relationship. By simply accepting them I could have overcome the theme itself. And I’m glad the technique worked! The thoughts will probably come back again because they’ve been on loop for so long it’s a habit, but keep it up! It can take a few weeks to really settle in and there may be some ups and down but you’ll notice a big difference over time.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
I’ll cut a long story short… SOCD/ HOCD was one of the first themes I got when I was a teenager. The first one was health but I didn’t know that was OCD at the time. Anyway, I have had SOCD for 11 years. Sometimes it leaves me alone and it feels like I’m my own self again! Don’t get me wrong it lingers but I manage. But… IT IS BACK!!! My head is telling me that I am a lesbian and that I need to just admit it. I hate it. I have a boyfriend who I love unconditionally and this has just sprung out of a dream I had -.- I don’t want to be a lesbian! The groinal responses have always been the worst. It started when I was around 16, I woke up one morning and my brain just said ‘you’re a lesbian’, as you can imagine I freaked out, panic attack and cried. Then, my brain starts looking into my childhood… well it’s had a field day. When I was around 9 my friend showed me girls kissing on YouTube and then I suppose I got addicted to it. I then used to play on Habbo and walk up to girls and say ‘kisses’ etc. my brain is now saying that this is evidence that I’m gay. I DONT WANT TO BE A LESBIAN!!! I have no issues with gay people, I just don’t want to be gay myself. Sometimes, when the thoughts come in I don’t seem to get anxious but I get groinals and that freaks me out! I just want peace. I hate this. I get so many different themes. Now it’s this one and I just want to crawl under my duvet, sleep until they’re gone but then I end up dreaming about it!!!
- Date posted
- 23w
im having a unusually hard flare up for two months. ive never had it this bad before (ive had this on and off for many years - thank god not constantly.) lately, i keep having these images in my head and scenarios in my head of me "coming out" in the future and ending my relationship with my amazing fiance who i love dearly. he knows everything but i still feel like i am constantly lying to him, my family, and friends. i need to know that this is something the SO-OCD can do to you? the weird thing is, is that i have never been attracted to woman. i do admire their beauty and wish to LOOK like them or have a specific feature they have, but i dont have any urges to like be with them yet i am dealing with this really bad flare up. My brain keeps telling me that since i have never tried it, i would never know, and i am just getting really distressed from it. i just want to be happy again and it seems impossible. I am convinced i am only person that is using SO-OCD as an excuse. Any guidance or advice, or anything really, will help. i just feel alone and scared and sad all the time.
- Date posted
- 21w
I feel awful that I keep coming on here whenever I’m down bad but oh my gosh OCD is the most painful shit that I have EVER experienced in my life and I have a physical chronic illness…. I hate to say it but I hate living right now it’s too painful… im crying as I type to the point where my stomach is hurting, I have pretty severe ocd I do have generalized anxiety and idk if that is connected with ocd but because of that I have most of the subtypes REAL EVENT OCD,POCD,ZOCD,ROCD,SOCD HARM OCD, you name it and I got it!!! a lot of also why I have have those theme is trauma growing up and involving those things^ as of right now i’m 25 and a women with the most loving boyfriend in the entire world before my ocd hit me I NEVER questioned my love and care and attraction with the love of my life I always knew I was going to marry and be with this person the rest of my life! Now with ocd it confuses me soooo much and now I think I’m gay and didn’t realize or indenial and listen I get it “don’t look for reassurance!” “It’s not the thing ocd is attacking that is the problem ocd is the actual problem!” Here’s the thing with that if I’m in a relationship and I’m gay that would mean I would have to leave that said relationship and to say that “oh yeah that stuff happens and you’ll move on” is absolutely devastating to me this is THE LOVE OF MY LIFE and your telling me that iv been lying to myself this whole time or that I didn’t realize?!?!? And that sexuality can change (even though some say it can’t google says otherwise and some people have said it can’t idek anymore) and all this other BULLSHIT I can’t take it WHY?!?! why does this have to happen why can’t I just be with my love the rest of my life?!? and yes before anyone says anything I have been attracted to girls more so when I was younger watching lesbian porn liking the body’s and fantazing them sexually it stopped when I got older but I still don’t get disgusted with women who are pretty it just makes me uncomfortable because I’m with the love of my life and before I remember talking to my partner and discussing certain childhood things I experienced and we discussed that we both could be a little bi and for certain I’m (demi sexual so I don’t even really care about looks) and I truly didn’t care!! NOW I do care even with being bi because again I don’t like thinking about anyone else but my partner but I do also know my parents are homophobic and I do think about if I am gay they wouldn’t be okay with that and I also dont want to deal with that so now I sound like in indenial right?!???? I didn’t even care about labels before my ocd it just didn’t matter but now it’s effected my sex life and it’s hard for me to enjoy sex with being so confused I’m so confused I googled everything can you still have sexual fantasies with same gender but still be straight? Can you fantasize about same gender or imagine marrying them all of it !!! And non of that disgusts me it just makes me uncomfortable AGIAN only bc I just love the partner I’m with right now!!! I’m so fucking confused do I have to leave my partner and accept that I’m gay is that going to happen in the future if I get better with ocd and find out it’s been true all along?!???
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond