Question
I suffer from Instant false memories I think something and think it’s real like right away Sometimes I record myself so that I can know I’m not doing anything bad? Is that a compulsion?
i am not a professional so take what i say with a grain of salt but to me, this does sound like a compulsion since it is a behavior you do in order to relieve the anxiety or stress of your false memories
Yes, my brother has false memory pocd and he used to record himself locking his door, recorded himself home alone, he had to stop doing it because his therapist told him it’s a compulsion
Hey! I legitimately do the exact same thing. I record myself at work, in social situations (especially when I’m alone) to ensure I don’t “do anything bad” or act out anything that goes against my morals and feelings. It is definitely a compulsion to document and I’ve found it so hard to break or try to ween off of since it feels so strong to want to document just in case something happens and it’s like I just don’t have the confidence in myself to say “yes/no that did/didn’t happen”. I’ve been trying to work on slowing my documenting down. So instead of the hundreds of pictures/videos I take a day of myself like a 24/7 reality show, I limit myself to only taking some pictures or one video. That way I’m not feeling totally cut off right away and panicked. It helps a little for me personally and is a form of ERP therapy! You got this though, even the smallest of steps means everything.
@SpiceyPisces Thank you so much for your reply thats good that you are slowly starting not to document your day, it deff will get better soon Little by little each day Thank you again, you got this too.
I feel like now I have to record what happens to me/details of situations that trigger anxious episodes in order to have the "memory" in ink so I can't confuse it later when the rumination comes in. It has to be specific as I can possibly manage, down to date and time. I have done this as journaling, but I usually did that at the end of the day, but now I feel like I have to do it immediately after the thing happens. Is this a sign of compulsive behaviour, or am I just losing grip on my own memory? I'm also starting to doubt myself very strongly when it comes to confirming if "the bad thing" didn't happen, or if the "right thing" did. I can have ample evidence to support the outcome I know happened/didn't happen, but still brain doubts. I've been trying to go about my day living in the belief that I am right, but anxiety does not like to let go. I suppose this is all part of whatever disorder I've developed... Just gotta live I suppose. I am so tired of this...
Does anybody else ever purposefully try to create a false memory to see if your other false memories are not true? lol it sounds weird but I’m currently dealing with a false memory that I said something horrible during a conversation.. so I try to see if my ocd does that with other conversations. That would validate that it is in fact my ocd and not real memories. I hope that makes sense 😭
Does anyone else have the compulsion of needing to document everything? I feel this ties in with my false memory OCD. I can not go anywhere by myself let alone be by myself in any work or social setting unless I have family or close trusted friend with me to be able to let me know and “witness” any events that happen. As I feel, I won’t remember them correctly if at all. I always feel something bad will happen to me or I will personally act out bad actions and not remember or recall. I document heavily on my phone (recording, pictures) as well as have a home camera and car dash camera. I fear this is my most triggering and most difficult obsession to try and conquer.
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