Dysphoria

I'm really really scared that I might be transgender I don't know if it's ocd or denial can anyone please help

I’m so fucking torn and so fucking lost. The last couple days, I feel like something in me has switched. I feel horrible about my body, especially my boobs and my vagina. I feel uncomfortable with anything female about myself and I feel like I need to GET OUT of my body. I feel so hyper aware of my breasts and I can’t ignore them. Looking at my body makes me anxious and feel nauseated. I can’t function, I’m dreading showering tomorrow. I always have a physical sensation of something in my lower region. My voice and face and name and pronouns trigger me and make me uncomfortable. The intrusive thoughts are either gone or are in the form of feelings. I’ll look at my face and suddenly I will feel like I don’t like it and it makes me uncomfortable. I DONT WANNA BE TRANS BUT I FEEL LIKE THIS IS DYSPHORIA. I feel like I finally understand WHY people transition. I feel like I need to change something because this feeling feels permanent. I’ve been wearing baggy masculine clothes every day because anything feminine makes me nauseous and feel horrible. I just wanna separate myself from anything female right now. Furthermore, I now usually “perceive” myself as a man. It’s like there is a man inside of me. Literally i sometimes feel like a male in a woman’s body. I keep imagining myself as this man character in my head, everything I do I feel like him. I’m so fucking tired. I’ve been having panic attacks and sobbing hysterically all day yesterday and today. The thought of ACTUALLY being trans is so fucking scary that it makes me cry and feel sick but the way I feel right now I feel like I need to be transgender and become male or else I will live in this horrible foggy misery forever. This has only been 2 days. Is it weird that I feel like I don’t even want my old self back, or that I don’t want it to be OCD???? It feels REAL. Can OCD do this because I genuinely hate my femaleness right now and I SEE myself as a male. Everything about my past feels so superficial and fake and like it was never me. I feel like this is me. And I cannot stress how fucking deep this feels. I feel like I genuinely want the surgery now. Everything feels so different. I need help. When I look at symptoms of TOCD, I feel like that’s ME! I did all of these in the very beginning. And I feel relieved but not convinced. But now, I relate more to dysphoria than actual TOCD. Is this something that can happen?

In my 24 years of living , out of nowhere I had the thought “what if I’m transgender” I tried to treat it as a silly thought , but then it kept popping up in my head and I started getting extremely anxious. OCD really is the tried and true doubting disorder , because what the actual fuck. I love being a man. I literally admire the male physique. I love being able to grow arm pit hair and not get judged. I do of course love women , and I am in touch with my emotions and I’m definitely feminine in a lot of ways , but I don’t want to change my gender. It’s just absurd. I really hate OCD #genderocd