- Date posted
- 19w ago
Acted on a Compulsion
Help me! I acted on a compulsion and now I feel like want to keep doing it. I’m scared. I had been doing okay for these past two days but idk. What should I do?
Help me! I acted on a compulsion and now I feel like want to keep doing it. I’m scared. I had been doing okay for these past two days but idk. What should I do?
Don’t do the compulsion, you know to not do it that’s why your posting this
@Anonymous I think this message might be a bit harmful to someone struggling with OCD, as logic doesn’t work with OCD, unfortunately. My advice is to live with uncertainty and doubt, and accept the fact that you gave into a compulsion (even if you didn’t want to). You can’t change the past, but you can change how you respond moving forward.
Just keep moving forward and practicing with the tools you've learned so far. Don't expect perfection. Any time you feel like you need to act on a compulsion is an opportunity to hone your skills. Take that opportunity to tune into your body and notice what it feels like when you want to do the compulsion. See what it feels like to not do the compulsion for 5 seconds. Then next time do the same thing for 10 seconds, then 15... Even stopping yourself from doing a compulsion for a few seconds is something to be celebrated. This is an ongoing training process that will pay off big time in the long run. Trust that you can handle the uncomfortable feelings that arise without needing to get rid of them.
Something that helps me is to remember that compulsions are temporary. Both in how long they last, and in how they satisfy. What I mean is, compulsions will only last a short while if you ignore them and don't act on them. They'll go away and eventually after enough victories your brain will understand the compulsion is not what you need anymore. On the contrary, if you give in, the satiafaction given from the action will only last a short while then you'll be back to anxiety in no time. Anxiety only wins if you let it. Don't give in and it'll pass. Hope that helps.
@daltonb.971 Thank you, good way to look at it!
@Anonymous My pleasure, glad to be of service. Good luck!
Don’t do the compulsion—you know it won’t help you.
Give yourself some self compassion, be proud of yourself for the two days that you didn't. Just keep moving forward ❤️
It's natural to have slip-ups and setbacks during your OCD recovery journey - I've had plenty of them myself. Try to be kind to yourself and know that these are not death sentences (i.e., now you will have OCD forever). You can't change the past, but you can change how you respond moving forward. You got this!!
I did a few sexual compulsions (only with myself of course) in the past (2 months ago , did it couple of times) and I regret it BADLY I want to die every time because of that because of the guilt that I can’t handle it I feel like a monster I can’t move on from this. I feel like I deserve nothing in life. I prefer to kill myself then do it again. Like what went on my mind. I wanted to check and get rid of the thought but I can’t live with the shame. I posted this a few times but cant move on. What I did was BAD sexual compulsion. My therapist said to me that people with ocd can have a sever compulsions. And I think I told her about this compulsion but I think she forgot so I’m planning to said it to her again so she will tell me if it’s actually ocd or not. And the fact that I did have another themes before Pocd but I don’t know if I have Pocd anymore cause I feel like a monster and like I crossed the line. I’m terrified that I went to far. I regret I badly. There is not a single day I’m not thinking about it and want to kill my self. That compulsion is against my morals like I become the person I was afraid of all the time. The shame will it me until the day that I die
I don’t know how to stop confessing. It’s driving me insane. I confess every little thing to my boyfriend. I confessed that I liked attention (this is so obviously human), that I liked it when people found me pretty (also very human??) I confessed about a million other things and I feel out of control. I felt so safe with him last night that it just started pouring out of me. I felt guilty and awful and I just needed release, I couldn’t breathe I felt like I was dying. I’m stuck in a confessing loop and I know I’m only making things worse. Has anyone experienced this and been able to overcome it? It feels absolutely horrible and impossible. I tried to ERP this and I genuinely feel like I am suffocating if I hold off. I feel so disappointed in myself, but I can’t seem to stop. I even had a dream where I confessed to him and woke up needed to confess that. I’m scared I’ll start sharing my worst intrusive thoughts I’ve had if I feel too safe around my bf. Help please :(
I know a few of you saw my posts about my ERP and the googling urges. That didn’t end up going well. My therapist actually decided we needed to halt it for now. The thing is it’s almost like I learned googling is harmless from those few exercises and my brain keeps generating more things to google. Normally I would just spiral and be done but now I can barely hold back from searching for long. I eventually give in. I’m horrified because it feels like I want to find illegal content. I swear on everything I am, I don’t want to find anything even close to it. I’m freaking out because I don’t understand what’s happening. I keep compulsively searching/testing/checking or idk. I keep remembering details and I feel like I need to google again to be sure of something. I feel absolutely insane can someone please help me??? I’m petrified I’m going to get in trouble.
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