- Date posted
- 5y ago
- Date posted
- 5y ago
You should join him in therapy if he goes to an ocd specialist. The specialist will help you to understand better what he’s dealing with and how you can actively help and speed his recovery. Watch for more insight on how to help if you haven’t already seen this video: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NLr04CEURdg
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Thank you very much!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
First of all, you deserve a ton of praise for doing your homework, researching OCD, and reaching out to find ways to support him. Props to you, he’s lucky to have a supportive partner like you. Second, I would maybe suggest reading some things written by people who have ROCD about managing the disorder while being in relationships. It might help to give you a better sense of his thoughts, especially since it might be hard for him to articulate exactly what’s going through his head to you, as you are his partner. If he’s not already seeing a psychologist/psychiatrist, I think it would be really helpful if you could support him in seeking one out, or if he is seeing one, see if you could attend a session with him, or perhaps attend the first 15 minutes or so of several sessions? When my OCD was centered around family relationships, my mother would join my therapist and I for the first 15 minutes of each session, and it was helpful to be able to discuss how OCD was affecting us and our relationship with a psychiatrist there to mediate and offer explanations and solutions. The last suggestion I have is to ask your partner what you can do to support him. For example, my family and I have a ‘panic protocol’ for when my OCD spirals into full-on panic attacks: I may need to be alone or I may want to have someone to talk to, but I will dictate which; don’t touch me during a panic attack; help me to a more secluded or quiet place so I can ‘take a break’ from people, etc. I also have an understanding with my best friend that if I ask her to ‘drown my brain out,’ I’m spiraling and need her to give me a distraction to help me break out of the spiral. These exact scenarios may or may not apply to you and your partner, but I wanted to give them as examples of ways you can set up support systems so that they’re ready to go in case you need them.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Thank you so much, that’s very helpful!!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I love the idea of having a panic protocol. I think I need to come up with one of these for myself/my bf. Thank you for the idea
- Date posted
- 5y ago
You are very nice person and I’m hope you deal with it, OCD is hard thing but if you love him, you help to him a lot with just understanding what happening with him. It’s really hard and sometimes scary to listen some thoughts but OCD thoughts are just thoughts. He scared of them same as you and even more, thats is why he share them with you, just for lowering anxiety level. English was very bad level so hope you’re understand ?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Thank you Tomm!!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Whew, sorry that got so long! Hope it’s helpful. Again, kudos to you for reaching out and finding ways to support your partner through this.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 17w ago
hi. so one big factor of my OCD is rumination. i met a guy who i have a crush on the idea of (idea bc there are red flags). my biggest fear is not finding true love, my ex told me no one else would deal with what i have (my ocd, specifically reassurance seeking and getting overstimulated after intimacy). a few weeks ago, my friends and family all gathered and tried to give me advice that sounded like “you’re shy and you’ll never find someone.” after that, i’ve felt off. i’ve been using an unhealthy coping skill, daydreaming, and i’ve just felt unbalanced. my ocd makes everything feel different sometimes, i can’t explain it. life, myself, almost like being in a dissociated state. has anyone else experienced that? i don’t know how to remain balanced during my off times and i know pms exasperates it all. i take ashwaghanda and omega 3s in a multi vitamin daily. i take them all together in the evening but i’ve missed three days recently and also messed with my rocky sleep schedule because of fun times with friends. i hope these supplements work, because i don’t know if i’d be brave enough for medication. i had a bad reaction on prozac and often am forgetful. i just have been battling my OCD consciously for almost ten years now and unconsciously for longer. i am so tired, as my mental health extends beyond my OCD. i’m in talk therapy with some cbt aspects but i only see her twice a month. i’ve broken down so many times and promised myself id get on track or that certain things would work, but it’s like i am stuck in a circle that gets smaller when i’m able to help myself. i just want to be normal. i want to be able to mess up my sleep schedule to enjoy good times and not suffer horrible consequences or fear that i will be entirely thrown off balance. i don’t want to worry or doubt or feel so dissociative that i squint my eyes for a moment and wonder why i feel so unreal. i will never understand why god has allowed me to go through this. i cannot let it be for nothing but i don’t know how much more to bend and contort my body and brain to get somewhere stable but how lovely it would be if i could. i don’t have much of a schedule right now, i get apathetic and give in with things from time to time. one thing can trigger me and i am back to square one wether in a week or month. any advice, any and all is so helpful. your stories, your thoughts. maybe feeling less alone and knowing what has helped you is exactly what i need right now. thank you 💗
- Date posted
- 14w ago
Sometimes I get really upset with my boyfriend and I can’t tell if I’m not having my needs met or if it’s my ROCD questioning things. I can’t express that I’m upset because he rlly doesn’t understand what is going on in my head and most times I bring it up it’s turned into an argument. It is really frustrating does anyone have any tips on deciphering this stuff or dealing with the upset feeling/ bad thoughts (IE: “He’s cheating on me and that’s why he’s not texting.”) (IE: “He’s talking like this because he just doesn’t love me, and he’s not attracted to me. He clearly wants to leave me but doesn’t have the heart to do it yet”)
- Date posted
- 11w ago
Specifically how can my fiance best support me without offering reassurance? I'm trying to encourage myself to grow and keep trying ERP, but I'm not sure how I can include my partner in a healthy way. I plan on talking to my therapist about it soon, but I wanted to hear thoughts from people who have been dealing with it themselves.
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