- Date posted
- 5y
- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 5y
Hi all, I’m a therapist here at NOCD. I read the original post asking about depersonalization and derealization. I wanted to add something you might find helpful. When you are having obsessive/intrusive/unwanted thought, I recommend not going to the compulsion. Stick with the thought, example -is this real or the feeling - I feel disconnected from others. Like the earlier post, accept that you feel this way or have this thought. Don’t let your mind wander away and go to the next thought or the next behavior. Accept it and then you can do an exercise to stay present. I call this exercise a “factual observation”. Look around you, state what you see, what you hear, using your senses can be like a reset. Bringing you back to the present. Give it a try and I hope it is helpful.
- Date posted
- 5y
Would vocalising any current thoughts and feelings with my parter be a compulsion?
- Date posted
- 5y
If mine is really bad then I have a song I listen to or if I can go for a walk outside that really help make me feel more grounded.
- Date posted
- 5y
I feel your pain!! This was me for the past 2.5 years. The best way I found is to just accept how you feel at this moment and realize it will not last forever. Accept all the “what if’s” and other scary possibilities, and you’ll realize that it’s not as bad or as scary as you think it is. Try not to seek reassurance and definitely stay off online forums, etc. regarding DPDR. There’s a lot of negativity there and it can be really difficult to break out of dpdr if you continue to research it. Try your best to accept it and in time, little by little it will go away.
- Date posted
- 5y
What’s dpdr?
- Date posted
- 5y
Just a short cut for depersonalization/ derealization!
- Date posted
- 5y
The last time I experienced this I ended up using a game on my phone and it literally took all the horrible feelings away and I started to feel myself again and just content. Even if your not into games on phones just take a look at what they have and you’ll probably find something ☺️
- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 5y
Hi lulu23 sorry I wasn’t online yesterday and this is a late response but I wanted to answer your question. It’s difficult to say because I don’t know what your symptoms look like before and now. I hear what you are saying in regards to struggling with the depersonalization - dpdr. In my experience of working with OCD clients, some struggle with these types of obsessive thoughts. In my work with these clients, treating these obsessive thoughts like any other obsessive thought and practicing your ERP to stick with the thought until the anxiety passes - not going to the compulsion which can be checking, seeming reassurance and the other examples given through out the posts here. In summary, whether your obsessive thoughts are about the symptoms of depersonalization, exentensial, derealization, or any other thought, it still has to be treated like an OCD thought. Your coping mechanisms can be the ERP skill set to move past these obsessive thoughts. As mentioned here in many posts, thoughts can change, abruptly or slowly, but they can change and we just have to stay focused on doing our ERP no matter what pops up and gets in our way. Please let me know if that helps at all to answer your question and see if it works for you and keep us updated. We care about your progress!
- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 5y
Hi FOCD123. Saying your thoughts out loud and vocalizing they doesn’t necessarily mean that is a compulsion. Sometimes saying your thoughts out loud can help keep you focused on the thought and keep your mind from wandering to the checking or compulsion. However, if saying your thoughts out loud is something you feel like you have to do and it brings you relief, it can be your compulsion. Seeking reassurance from your partner by telling them your thoughts can be a compulsion. Pay attention to how it makes you feel, if you feel the urgency of telling your thoughts or the urgency to get a reply, most likely can be a compulsion. It’s difficult for you to know until you get really good at separating the trigger from the obsessive thought and from the compulsion behavior. So, it can a challenge for me to answer that question unless we were working together and I knew better what your patterns look like. I’m sorry, I’m sure that wasn’t the answer you were looking for. Try to separate like I talked about. Using the worksheets will bring clarity as well. Wishing you much success! You can do this!
- Date posted
- 5y
Thanks terrie! I’m starting therapy this Thursday here in the UK so starting to get excited!
- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 5y
That’s great to hear! Good for you and I know you will do great! ?
- Date posted
- 5y
Can we treat dpdr the same way we treat ocd? Can we go into our fears to overcome them? Many people that have derealization/depersonilization tell me there’s no need to trigger myself but I’ve been taught the opposite with ocd
- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 5y
Hi lulu23. I’m not sure what you mean, could you give me a little more information? Can we treat derealization and depersonilization the same way we treat OCD symptoms using ERP?
- Date posted
- 5y
Yes exactly. I have read in various dpdr forums that dpdr itself causes sufferers to have intrusive existential thoughts that increase the feelings of dpdr. I’m under the impression that to get rid of these type of thoughts I should expose myself to them but people in the community have told me I should avoid what triggers my dpdr feelings. I’m kind of at a point where I’m not sure I still have dpdr or if it’s just the thoughts that I had while feeling very dissociated that’s stuck around. I feel like The thoughts and feelings associated with the dpdr were stranger than any of the thoughts I’ve ever had with just ocd. Ive also heard that dpdr is just ocd that has reached 10/10 severity so you think there is any truth to that? Sorry if this makes no sense I tried my best to explain and sorry for the length.
- Date posted
- 5y
Meant to say do you not so you* sorry about that.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
I’m in an absolutely crippling episode dealing with real event/ false memory. I literally cannot get out of it and it is beyond hell. Can someone please help me with advice? If you have been through this how did you get through?! I’m out of work, the only relief is when I’m sleeping no exaggeration. My husband is being super supportive and Is also taking time off to be with me. Was there a specific medication or any tricks that helped? I’m beyond desperate. Thank you
- Date posted
- 15w
i came out of it now i’m back in , what helps?
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 13w
I used to get caught in a loop with existential thoughts very frequently. Every question made my stomach drop: (TW: existential questions) … … ... "Why does anything exist at all? What will death be like? Is anything even real? Is there any meaning to this? Is the universe infinitely big, and if not, what's beyond it? Are there multiverses? Has the universe been around forever? Will the universe end for good, or will it keep going forever? What is forever like? What even IS reality?" It would get so overwhelming that I remember lying on the floor in a fetal position for hours because I felt like there was no escape. I spent most of my days reading articles and watching videos about theoretical astrophysics and philosophy in a desperate attempt to "figure it all out." Of course that only made me more anxious, raised more questions, and kept me trapped in the cycle. Things started to improve once I learned to turn TOWARD reality, rather than away from it, and ERP really helped me do that. I learned that these questions weren't the problem. I learned that I can actually handle the anxiety that arises when exposed to these ideas and concepts. I don't have to figure anything out to make the anxiety go away; it arises and passes away on its own. Ironically, bringing myself into the present moment and becoming more aware of reality helped me escape the cycle of existential dread. Because of that, this topic no longer takes over my life. If I'm triggered by something I see, hear, or think, I may still feel a little twang of anxiety, but then it just goes away. "Maybe, maybe not" has been the single most useful phrase of my life. Do you ever get trapped in a cycle of existential questions? Are you worried that the ERP approach would be too scary to handle? If so, I'm happy to give my advice.
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