- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Because ocd takes what really means a lot to you and using what you world die for
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes
- Date posted
- 4y
Same here. I was always a germaphobe but it really started coming out the first time I moved out in university. Now with the pandemic it's full blown. In my personal case, I wonder if it's that I started craving safety when I first moved out of my parents house and had no buffer of safety. I had to entirely support and care for my well being myself. When i first moved out i was constantly scared i would be hospitalized and my parents would be hours and hours away
- Date posted
- 4y
Yooo, same thing happened to me broo, like almost 2 years ago coming January, I literally freaked out out of no where about one intrusive thought. It sent me into a extreme guilt panic attack that night, my world spiraled downards after that night. Literally 5 minutes before that thought i was totally fine, never knew what intrusive thoughts were, never had thoughts that i have now. I literally think a out that night every.single.day trying to find the answer about what happened to me. I would give up everything i have to go back to how i was before that night and know that it wouldn’t happen.
- Date posted
- 4y
Bro, same. I remember the turning point for me too. I always had OCD, even when I was a little kid, but it was manageable. I didn't understand what it was so I thought it was normal. Anyway, maybe 4 years ago was when a switch flipped and everything went downhill. Literally one bad day set the tone for the next 4+ years and I'd do anything to go back in time and change a couple of things.
- Date posted
- 4y
I pray, but nothing changes. I start getting afraid to pray because i get thoughts like “ill answer your prayer if you act out an intrusive thoughts” and im like no dude wtf i dont want to do that. Then i just think wtf is wrong me, im going crazy cause its just thoughts. Why do i care about controlling them so much if they dont mean anything?
- Date posted
- 4y
Same here kinda! Looking back I could see some examples of religious OCD popping up here and there since I was 11 but it wasn’t very often and it didn’t hinder my life. It wasn’t until I was 23 that I had a random intrusive thought that was a breaking point and my brain changed ever since. It was extremely frustrating to have my life change like that (cried many times over it) and even now on my harder days I get reminded of that frustration, but what can I do? Just learn to adapt now and recover. It reminds me of my best friend, he was perfectly fine then one day something start changing with him, now he has Crohn’s disease. It completely changed his life, but now he has to adapt. It isn’t fair and it’s weird when it seems to just show up out of nowhere when we were gone, but I guess that’s life and the hand we’ve been dealt. Now we manage it
- Date posted
- 4y
*fine, not gone
- Date posted
- 4y
I have a similar story to yours. I had OCD when I was a little kid but I didn't know exactly what it was at the time and so I thought it was normal and everyone thought and acted the same way. As I got older (im in my 20s now), there were a few events that led to the big event that made my OCD uncontrollable. It's strange being able to tell almost the exact moment where you life changed and I keep thinking about how differently I'd do things if I could go back in time and have another chance
- Date posted
- 4y
@IcePenguin19 Yes I completely understand what you mean. A few months before my OCD onset I went on vacation with my friend but I had a lot of things going on that I didn’t thing would’ve affected me, such as that trip, moving to a new house with my family, getting the flu, etc. I guess it had taken a huge toll on me mentally because on that trip I had a major anxiety episode that I never had before where I couldn’t eat, sleep, or function. Just anxiety tho no OCD. It lasted a week and a half. Then it disappeared but I kept feeling like this anxiety was trying to creep back in for months. Then in August of last year I had another anxiety episode like the previous one which I think I was triggered by travel because my last anxiety episode happened on a trip and I had another one coming up. It was during this anxiety episode that that one intrusive thought appeared and OCD happened.
- Date posted
- 4y
@Evelyn4416 Yes! Mine started on a trip as well. A few months before, I finished cutting back on my meds and I was officially off of them in 2015. Then an event the next summer brought my OCD into overdrive and I haven't been able to get a handle on it whatsoever. I'm so sorry that happened to you, stressful events do some weird stuff to us
- Date posted
- 4y
@IcePenguin19 It’s just so weird because you never know that a certain event of decision just breaks your brain I guess? Like how do you prevent that if everything seems to be going normal? Brains are so complicated 🧐
- Date posted
- 4y
@Evelyn4416 They're so complicated! I would have never guessed that anything would have set me off like that, especially not the event that did it for me. It's so weird to think about and look back on. I know people who have had the same or very similar event happen with them and they didn't get any obsessions or compulsions with it. I keep asking myself "why me? Why did this happen to me? Why is my brain doing this to me when my friend had a similar situation happen to her?" It's confusing
- Date posted
- 4y
@IcePenguin19 I actually heard about a model called the Diathesis Stress Model which is a theory that tries to explain how a mental disorder comes about due to factors such as predispositional vulnerability and stress that comes about due to things in life, so it explains I think how certain circumstances can create sort of this “perfect storm” and create a mental illness, and also how some people can go through the same thing and not have anything happen to them but someone else it can creat a mental disorder. Super interesting stuff if you ever wanna look into that model!
- Date posted
- 4y
i'm confused, will we ever be like we used to?
- Date posted
- 4y
Oh man, that's the big question right there. I really hope so!
- Date posted
- 4y
Usually it starts in your adulthood. Also....love the username haha
- Date posted
- 4y
In here with you, thankfully got a diagnosis around 5 months after it started last year, but I’m having a hard time seeing life the same way since. It’s been tough.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
Where do I begin with this…….. so my OCD has been around since childhood and has had many themes over the years. I only realised I have it just over 2 years ago. I’ve tried many things to help it not be such a monster and thought I had a good grip on it for a length of time until now! Some of my strategies have been acceptance, change of perception of thoughts and sometimes on hard days just telling myself that no matter what, I have to be brave and go out and live life. In the last few months I’ve developed none OCD related anxiety as well and so have been looking at ways to help with that. Sunday morning I was just casually scrolling TikTok and a video only about 30 seconds long or so comes up, seemingly a therapist of some kind, straight away the video began something like “you cannot replace a thought with another thought” along the lines of “you can’t THINK your way out anxiety” I don’t know the full context of the video it wasn’t long enough, I don’t know who the therapist was I didn’t look but now purely because of that one sentence my OCD has gripped onto it so badly and is trying to tear down some of my strategies because I have used changing my thought patterns a lot to help me, self compassion etc but now because of that video I’m struggling! I’m not looking for answers but I am just really upset and it feels like I’m in an impossible grip of OCD again
- Date posted
- 20w
Anyone else develop it in their 30s? I’m 33 and just started showing symptoms in October 2024. So far have only been diagnosed with GAD , PD and depression.I started having intrusive thoughts after a series of panic attacks . My compulsions would be googling. I have made an effort to stop though because it only makes me feel worse. My intrusive thoughts have been around fear of going crazy
- Date posted
- 17w
I started dealing with OCD when I became fixated on health issues, particularly the fear of contracting a life-threatening disease. If I experienced any kind of medical symptom, no matter how small, that even remotely hinted at something potentially fatal, it would drive me crazy, and I couldn’t stop obsessing over it. Then one day, I started having intrusive thoughts about accidentally hitting someone with my car, and I would end up driving in circles to check if I had. Eventually, I found myself overwhelmed by a flood of new obsessive thoughts and compulsions. One day, while I was at the park, a squirrel came near me, and for some reason, I felt like it attacked me. I Googled it and learned that squirrels could carry rabies, which spiraled me into a deep fear of rabies. I became consumed with the thought I received a bite from a squirrel, raccoon, or bat any time I’m in areas that trigger me. It started off only being inside then transferred to even being in my own home. This made me obsess over every physical sensation in my body, compulsively checking to make sure nothing was wrong. One compulsion that I hated the most would to be putting rubbing alcohol on me to make sure that I had no open wounds. Every day feels like I’m walking around in a fog of anxiety, constantly worrying that I won’t even make it to old age. Sometimes, it gets so overwhelming that I just want it all to end. It stresses me so bad at times to where my brain feels like I’ve been studying all day.
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