Harm ocd hits hard... brain I think we need some time apart 🤦‍♂️ who else feels this 😔

I have harm ocd and feel this in my soul. I'm going through NOCD counseling now and have good and bad days. My harm ocd is extreme I'm terrified I'm going to murder my family. So ERP is about me learning to accept that it could happen. I could go crazy and hurt them and I don't like thinking like that because I know I wouldn't. But in order to beat OCD my counselor says I need to come to terms with the fact of uncertainty and I could do it. Highly unlikely- but he says I need to tell myself not impossible. By me saying that to myself I'm desensitising myself to the thought and realizing that thought isn't dangerous. At the end of the day we're not in control of our thoughts, not in control of our feelings- but we are in control of our actions and beliefs. So always remember that. Keep up the good fight! It gets better - I promise!!

Me too especially about wanting a new brain!

Seriously, guys harm ocd is almost never talked about. People have it but are very ashamed of it. It’s so sad. We suffer internally way too much. We need to turn things around and break the stigma on harm ocd.

Most of the time I would like a new brain

Snapping and becoming a murder, suicide... yours?

And POCD, which is the most horrific thing ever 😭

Yup I feel you. It’s a challenging thing to have.

Everyday.

We internalize these emotions, feelings, intrusive thoughts, urges etc... we suffer when we do that....

What are your harm ocd thoughts?

Trigger- Me- fear of loosing control and becoming this psycho killer. Afraid of loosing touch with my caring feelings- fear of maybe I like these thoughts- fear of harming someone I love or care about- friends- family- loved one... fear of ending my life because I don’t want to commit a crime... fear of acting out my harm ocd thoughts and getting locked up forever and loosing my freedom. Fear of being alone and hated in the process.

Anyone every have the false memory, what I did knock some down, what If I did rape someone?

What if*

Yea it’s hard bro sometimes I don’t even wanna get up cause it hurts

It's so tormenting..... cos you are so on edge, will someone find out, will I be belived... the shame, the guilt. All the while knowing logically that if that was remotely true... you wouldn't be alive or it wouldn't be a secret.... Which is wen I realised that "confession" is a compution.... how can you be guilty for something you didnt not would ever do ..... 😫😭😫

When I say that.... I mean the "urge" to confess.... is the compulsion.....

I scared Im gonna accidentally kill myself. Which makes me wanna kill myself. Which gives me urges to kill myself so it all will stop. So the killing of myself is both an obsession, a compulsion, and an actual thought cause OCD is the worst. Plus I dont get close to kids cause maybe I will kill them to by accident because I go crazy.