- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
This might be true for some people and might be untrue for others. Who knows, but who cares🤷🏽♂️. You aren’t in those peoples lives or thoughts so we can never get a 100% answer. We all have to get to a point where we can read other people’s posts and it does not cause anxiety or make us ruminate. This could be a really good exposure for you to start working on! If I would have read this two weeks ago. You probably would have given me really bad anxiety and made me second guess myself , but reading it today it really did nothing.
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- 4y
Good for you! I wish I was at your spot in my recovery! I need to calm down, this did freak me out. I have had people comment and say maybe you’re bi and that has made it all the worse for my recovery.
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- 4y
@wellwellwell Honestly it just depends on the day. Let these posts freak you out, but sit with it until it goes down at least half way. Maybe you are bi, but maybe not (I am not trying to trigger you). WHO CARES. You have to work on accepting the uncertainty of all of it. I don’t know half the time myself.
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- 4y
@Anonymous I know, and I’m trying. But I’m married and leading on a man you married terrifies me. I’m so close to him that the thought of deceiving both him and myself is just so horrifying
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- 4y
@wellwellwell I do not want to reassure you and provide you relief, but everything you’re saying is what it’s like having HOCD. HOCD and ROCD come hand and hand.
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- 4y
@Anonymous I know, but unlike other people on here I respond more to sexual images of women vs men. I don’t know if it’s just from looking at porn when I was little or what but it’s terrifying. It truly is. And seeing people say they don’t think everyone on here has HOCD is even worse
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- 4y
I am a heterosexual man and I am feel like I respond to more sexual images of men (which I HATE). I was addicted to porn as well and it really messed me up. I have stopped watching porn for about three months now and it was helped me with the intrusive images. I also get UNWANTED groinal reponses, which are shitty. I have felt like my attraction for women isn’t as strong or even there half the time. Not everyone’s HOCD is the exact same. We are all different people and just because you don’t have the EXACT feelings or stories of other people does not mean you have OCD. Your brain does not know your sexual orientation BTW. Sometimes your brain just likes the rush of something taboo.
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- 4y
Wow, yeah that sounds almost exactly like what I’m going through. I don’t understand this. I don’t want it at all and it makes me cry and I love men but I just can’t let it go
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- 4y
@wellwellwell Have you been in a relationship with HOCD? I want to find a way to be happy even with this
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- 4y
@wellwellwell I don’t even know if it’s about “letting go”. It’s more of accepting the thoughts and nothing more than just thoughts. I used to try A LOT because of it. But my therapist told me I’m giving my thoughts a lot of weight. Think of it as a train that’s passing you by with thoughts. Let the train pass by, but don’t actually hop on it. Don’t be hard on yourself for having these thoughts. Be more kind to yourself. If one of your friends came to you with the same issue, would you be hard on your friend or kind? I’m sure the answer is kind , so be more kind to yourself.
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- 4y
I struggle with this theme, and I also have had those same thoughts. OCD will latch onto anything!!! Especially about your theme and anything that could create any bit of doubt about it. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. We can get through it!
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- 4y
I have this problem too. I genuinely believe people read what I wrote and think I’m actually gay. And to be honest I wouldn’t blame them.
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- 4y
I’m the person who you commented on their post and asked if I was bi because I’m turned on by naked women more than naked men😞 so this sucks but I’m trying really hard. I’m married
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- 4y
@wellwellwell i don’t think you’re bi, i really don’t i know that’s reassurance but I don’t.
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- 4y
@lolashewas None of this is your fault, I have been letting my ocd go unchecked. You’re fine, I want you to fight your ocd too! I let a bad thought turn into a bad day. I hope you’re feeling better❤️
Related posts
- Date posted
- 20w
Anyone else with HOCD get thoughts of like "people in denial try to distract themselves" or anything along those lines when just trying to move on from the thoughts. Having a pretty bad episode this morning at least anxiety wise.
- Date posted
- 12w
trigger warning!!!!!! I’m really scared right now. I’ve been reading Elle Warren’s articles about her experience with HOCD/SO-OCD, and it feels so similar to mine. She went through the same fears of being a lesbian, felt distressed by her attraction to women, and spent hours ruminating, Googling, and analyzing her feelings. She even experienced groinal responses and revisited old memories, just like I do. Eventually, she had a moment of realization in college when she flirted with a girl, and everything clicked. She now identifies as a lesbian. I’m terrified that the same thing will happen to me. I thought the OCD fears were supposed to never be true and that HOCD thoughts are usually just compulsions that don’t end up being real. But reading her story, it’s like I’m seeing my own experience mirrored. What if it clicks for me, just like it did for her? What if I realize that I am a lesbian? Elle’s story makes me so scared. I thought my feelings of attraction to women were just OCD-driven, and now I’m questioning everything. I thought I was straight, but now, reading her journey, I’m wondering: could my OCD fears actually be real? Elle’s experience was very similar to mine: • She got distressed when she thought she might like women, not relieved. • She spent a lot of time ruminating, Googling, analyzing, and comparing. • Her attraction to women only became intense when her OCD flared up. • She said things like, “I feel peace when I believe I’m straight.” • She had already been diagnosed with OCD and had a history of this pattern. After years of fear and distress, Elle had a moment of calm and realized that it was true. I’m scared that this could happen to me too. Will I have a similar moment of acceptance, where everything clicks and I realize I’m gay? Or will I come to accept that this is all OCD, and that I’m straight, with the possibility that I’m not? I also keep thinking back to when my OCD lessened the first time. Did I go back to men because I wasn’t actually attracted to women, or was it just because the grip of the OCD had loosened? Elle also talked about the shame associated with non-heterosexuality. She mentioned that, like many of us, she had internalized stigma around being gay, and that it made her fear the possibility of being non-heterosexual. I can relate to this so much—growing up, I never saw it as an option to be anything other than straight, and now it’s hard to shake that fear and shame. Elle mentioned that she found reassurance in seeing other people with HOCD who worried that their fears would come true, but eventually realized they were just OCD thoughts. That idea is comforting, but also a little scary, because what if that moment of realization happens for me too? What if I finally accept that I am a lesbian? Or, what if I’m just struggling with OCD and eventually realize I’m straight? I just don’t know. The scariest part is that, just like Elle, I feel like I don’t have any obvious signs. She had no idea she was a lesbian until one day, everything clicked. She was 21, just like me when my OCD fears really flared up, and she had a breakthrough moment in Denver when she made friends with lesbians. That hasn’t happened for me yet, and it’s terrifying to think that it could happen in the future. I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I’m really scared about where this will lead.
- Date posted
- 7w
Does anyone else read other peoples post and think it’s for them or about them and their situation and start to think that’s what they are going through themselves ? Or like I’m blaming ocd but it’s my brain actually telling that’s how I actually feel?
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