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- 4y
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- 4y
Of course but that’s a great exposure! I would look for coming out stories where people came out late after being in denial and sit with the anxiety and do nothing. You should try and use it as an exposure. Don’t look for reassurance just sit with the anxiety for a couple of hours thinking it could possibly be you.
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- 4y
You’re never going to get better until you accept that you might be gay. Sit with the anxiety and the thoughts and do nothing. You keep asking for reassurance by coming here and telling your story. You’re not going to get better this way. Trust me, get back on the horse and try again. Let yourself think the thoughts are true and do not argue with them even though you don’t like them. You have to take the risk
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- 4y
Kind of , when people tell their coming out story in this way, yes
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- 4y
As a gay person who didn’t struggle with acceptance even though I live in a homophobic society, it def triggers me when people say they had to do the mental work to accept themselves
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- 4y
Hi there. I saw that you are gay. Is there any way you would want to message with me on the side? I am dealing with HOCD and have a few questions.
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- 4y
@wyattthedude No dude don’t go down this path. You are looking for reassurance. Stay away. Look for the anxiety. Accept the anxiety and live with the possibility it may or may not be true. It gets easier trust me
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- 4y
@wyattthedude I agree with the op. As much as I don’t mind answering any questions, I don’t think it’s a good as this will only end up feeding your ocd. But if you still insist then we can talk on discord
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- 4y
@Reassurance Destroyer It’s so much harder because i’m in a 2 year serious relationship.
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- 4y
@wyattthedude That’s an excuse and a ritual. You need to accept the possibility that you may or may not be gay. Don’t tell yourself it’s harder because you’re in a 2 year relationship. Let’s sit with the anxiety and not do anything about it. Trust me it gets better.
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- 4y
Yes
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- 4y
Yes, right now my biggest worry is that girls are somehow going to seem appealing to me. So now it feels like I’m curious? But I don’t think I’m curious, it’s more like I’m desperate to make sure it’s not what I like and it feels like the only way I’ll know is by looking into it and I’m just scared. I mean I understand why people like girls, but I don’t think it’s for me but my mind says since I recognize the appeal it must mean I want it for myself. :/
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- 4y
You’re trying to figure something out. You should accept the possibility that the thought is true and do not try to check in on it. Try to sit with the anxiety and uncertainty for as long as possible
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@Reassurance Destroyer You’re right
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This is what scares me as I was never told this, 6 therapists told me it was OCD and I wasn’t Gay but this feels real so are you lot saying it can be as this has destroyed my 10 year relationship with a girl I was with and had no issues before.. can someone come out of this realising they are Gay as people and therapists have told me this doesn’t or hasn’t happened but have to live with the uncertainty
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- 4y
Are you asking if you can realize you’re gay through HOCD?
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- 4y
Again! Accept the thoughts are true and do not respond to them. SIT WITH THE ANXIETY AND DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
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- 4y
@Reassurance Destroyer the HOCD is so bad that at this point it feels like it would be easier if it was real.
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@Reassurance Destroyer Okay.
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- 4y
@wyattthedude Good that it feels real. Once you get to that point sit with it hide your phone. Don’t disagree with it and just let the anxiety take what it wants. Trust me it gets easier
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- 4y
@wyattthedude Play a game. See how long you can go with sitting with the possibility that your fear is true. See how long you can go with the anxiety. Trust me you’ll see results
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- 4y
@wyattthedude Yes this is what scares me as I was never told this for over 10 years therapists said people don’t realise there themes are true.. I have been with a girl for 10 years have I misunderstood OCD as thought it meant this wasn’t true from what therapists told me
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@Anonymous I’m sorry, is there any way you can rephrase this? I don’t quite understand.
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- 4y
@wyattthedude Who cares what she said. You are you. Quit searching for reassurance through someone else’s life.
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- 4y
But I can’t as I don’t want to be Gay I want my life back. I accept I am gay but can’t stop thinking of all the acts throughout the day I don’t know how to stop ruminating and when I do accept I am Gay I feel like I have accepted I am and then I have just been in denial and been misled by therapists who told me I wasn’t and it was just OCd. Accept it can be true then if I am then I have lied to my partner and misled her so why are therapists telling me I am not and it’s OcD. I don’t want to be gay and will never be able to accept it as I don’t want to be
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- 4y
You said can someone with Hocd realised they are Gay but I am been diagnosed with ocd and told by over 6 therapists this doesn’t happen but people fear it will like people realise they are Gay or a pedophile.
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Again REASSURANCE
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Just scared as been with my partner for 10 years and I feel I like the these thoughts but don’t want and hound me 24/7 which has left me housebound. Everything is kissing men and all other acts my parents and girlfriend have sat through therapy and they have said it’s ocd and I am not so why don’t I believe them
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- 4y
https://youtube.com/channel/UCX7a7Ydw1-lZq-cwHkeND2Q Watch ocd mindful he helped me get through HOCD. Highly recommend subscribing
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- 4y
I have watched a few of his videos but my therapist told me it’s just OCd and I am not Gay or a pedophile but why do I feel I like these thoughts
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Go watch this video and understand how your therapist is wrong. https://youtu.be/jbRUUnESn-0
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@Reassurance Destroyer What do you mean therapist is wrong so I could be gay and pedophile then
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The problem is I feel I know I am Gay now and so confused with what I was told and my family that this was OcD and I wasn’t
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- 4y
Try to accept that you’re gay for a day without ruminating or doing any compulsions. I bet you in hours you’ll feel way better. See how long you can sit with the anxiety. Take the risk that the possibility is true
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- 4y
I know but I don’t want to be but feel I already know on and I am destroyer
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
I’m 25 and never ever thought this before my soocd relapse. I have a bf of 5 years. Never been a high libido kinda girl. Don’t get me wrong I do get turned on by my bf but not like every day you know? - That had always been in the back of my head, is this normal and ok? But my ocd has latched onto the most scariest what if EVER. My brain is now saying How do you know you won’t prefer to sleep and kiss girls if you haven’t tried it: and it’s that unknown that is scaring the shit out of me. I DONT AND NEVER HAVE wanted to sleep / kiss a girl. But now my intrusive thoughts is all I think about!!! I don’t want I don’t want I don’t want??? So why does my brain think BUT WHAT IF??? I know ocd thrives off uncertainty which is why I think this is happening? But I don’t wanna find out or work it out because all I want is to be with my bf and marry him!! Is this just the epitome of OCD?
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- "Pure" OCD
- OCD newbies
- Students with OCD
- Relationship OCD
- Sexual Orientation OCD
- Young adults with OCD
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- 19w
Can sexual orientation ocd make you act on your fears and make you have same sex experiences ever and then after the experience realize that’s not what you are or want?
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- 6w
I can't look at 18+ videos, comics, etc. I am straight, but SO-OCD tries to make me think I am not And the thoughts turns to feelings, and makes me scared, uncomfortable, sad, because I know this is not me. And when I try to imagine myself being with the woman on adult videos, and comics, my OCD gives gronal response not at the girl, and it fills me with fear, and anxiety, I always loved, and was attracted to women but I can't and it caused me to be depressed, and I keep ruminating I keep trying to focus on her, but it's so bad that I avoid those all the time now. I am wondering has anyone gone through something like this, or currently is, and wondering how you have done to combat this!
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