I watched porn and i feel guilty. My brain is telling me that they could have been 18 on the dot but i still watched it bc i felt like my brain was sabotaging me. I clicked on videos with mature audiences but it tells me you scrolled through young pornstars. I feel disgusted and depressed. I honestly don’t care about living sometimes.

My advice would be to cut out porn, it is what triggered my current ocd episode for the last two months. It feels good in the moment but does a lot of damage.

Sadly it is almost impossible to know if the porn you're consuming is made by adults or even willing participants at all. It's not great for your mental health either, it works on the same mental pathways as drugs. Do what you want with that info, but please don't shame yourself. Porn is a trap designed to draw you in, and it's not your fault that it works so well. You can quit, if you want, it will be hard though.

As someone who's recovering from a porn addiction that has started since I was 13 and has lasted for 5 years, cut this horrible creation out of your life. Seriously. You don't want it to continue. Especially as an OCD sufferer. You are better off putting your energy into things that are more healthy. If you feel guilty about watching porn, take it as a warning sign. Take it to heart. OCD LOVES to thrive on the things you've said and so many people have come to post about that same kind of thinking. Porn is literally the reason why I have OCD in the first place. Had I been warned about this stuff and told it was a like a drug (which it most definitely is) I would have never touched it. It boggles my mind on how much society continues to defend this industry to be honest. You are also not a bad person for watching or struggling with pornography. Ethical porn pretty much doesn't exist. You'll never know what videos are fairly made or not. One way or another, trafficking insues somehow.

I suggest porn movies if you’re going to watch porn. You know for a fact they’re not under 18 since they’re produced and filmed in California or Nevada.