- Date posted
- 5y ago
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Good idea. I’m not here too often but many will know I relapsed last year with dreadful thoughts of either being the abuser or seeing people abuse my own children. I’m complicated as I have PTSD running through my OCD, which mainly comes in during sexual contact when I have a relapse. I either withdraw or get really sexually preoccupied and addicted. So POCD and sexual ocd were one facet of my mental condition and trauma. The thoughts I had were vivid, regular and reflected things I had experienced. Chronic stress triggered the relapse and the relapse was possible because of underlying trauma not adequately dealt with. Trying to do that now. But I saw all kinds of vivid abusive imagery, unnatural sex acts, and truly vile shit. Very hard for me to get my brain to not worry or hate itself for throwing this stuff up. I’ve been working on this since August/sept last year. It’s taking a long time to truly go, but it’s been under some control for some time. My heart goes out to anyone suffering this because it makes you feel like a pervert, a monster and not worthy of anything from anyone. But I’m worth much more, so much more. I will continue to work hard, and I will get OCD free. Totally ocd free. I will accept nothing less
- Date posted
- 5y ago
It's been very hard for me in recent times to accept my obsessions related to sexually intrusive content because it makes me feel so guilty for no reason. I keep having this constant paranoia that I have done something vile or completely inappropriate ...but I guess this is what the ocd is trying to do... Camouflaging itself and pretending that these things are really YOU, when the are definitely not
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I've been feeling better about it the past couple weeks or so
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’m so ashamed to even talk about it. My OCD disgusts me so much and I just want to say I am so sorry over and over and over.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
very inspiring both of you! and remember, even if ocd doesn’t ALL go away, you can still manage it and recover to be the best person you can be!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
do you have a therapist who knows about ocd and can recognize it? @charm
- Date posted
- 5y ago
mhm. like 30 minutes ago i was fine and could dismiss the thoughts but then i *Trigger Warning* masturbated and had intrusive thoughts and now my brain is trying to tell me it wasn’t ocd and blah blah blah. ughhhhh
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I've had plenty of intrusive thoughts while masturbating
- Date posted
- 5y ago
i know, i just feel like i’ve triggered myself. like now the thoughts won’t stop and my body is “reacting” to everything when 45 minutes ago i was fine and at ease. any tips?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
It just gets easier when you get time pass
- Date posted
- 5y ago
thanks
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I see people make groups to deal with their OCD, should we make one for us
- Date posted
- 5y ago
honestly i’d like that, as long as we stay anonymous and all that. is there a way on this app that we could?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Dont think so, but I was thinking a discord server
- Date posted
- 5y ago
that’s cool with me.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I made one incase anyone is interested https://discord.gg/CdfDb6
- Date posted
- 5y ago
i’ll make an announcement
- Date posted
- 5y ago
@scorpio mcd no, therapy didn’t work for me, my therapist didn’t understand:(
- Date posted
- 5y ago
i’m sorry about that, maybe try and find one that specializes in ocd?
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w ago
I, like so many others, have had ocd for most of my life. I have had many themes throughout my life. I am a mom and have had harm and pocd as well. For me those have been the most difficult and most painful themes. I have seen many people post on this app and they have had some pretty horrible and disturbing intrusive thoughts or false memories and real events ect. much worse than mine and I have never judged anyone because I know how bad ocd and intrusive thoughts can get. I had someone comment on a post I made recently asking me if I even have ocd insinuating it’s not ocd and i’m a actually just a pedo. That upset me so much because anyone who has experienced pocd knows how horrific and disturbing the intrusive thoughts can get and how opposite of who we really are ocd is. Our ocd already makes us doubt ourselves so to have a fellow sufferer of ocd say something like that can be so damaging. So many people are afraid to seek help or post on apps like this out of fear of being judged so we have to be mindful of what we comment. This person, after reading their bio has never experienced that theme and so they have no idea what it’s like or how bad it can get. I am writing this post because I think we need to be more understanding of those who suffer with themes we haven’t and not be judgmental especially if we don’t know them or their ocd story and what they have been through. I beat my ocd and for years I was ocd free until a recent stressful situation in my life and it came back and has been relentless and worse than ever before. I have had so many kind people give me great support on this app and I give support as much as I can when I see posts of others going through similar things as me. Be kind and think before you comment.
- Date posted
- 20w ago
Hi everyone, I wanted to reach out to see if anyone else has experienced something similar with OCD and intrusive thoughts. I’ve been struggling during moments of intimacy because intrusive thoughts, particularly ones related to POCD, feel so ‘sticky’—like they’re all I can picture. Even though I really want the thoughts to go away, they persist, and I’ve been trying not to avoid intimacy because of them. However, that makes me feel like I’m somehow ‘enjoying’ the thoughts or images, which I really dislike. It’s like my brain is playing this awful trick, and it’s leaving me feeling confused and gross. I guess I’m supposed to not let the thoughts bother me and continue as if nothing’s wrong, but I’m scared that by doing so, I’m almost training myself to get off to them or something. This fear makes it so hard to trust myself in those moments, and it’s been overwhelming. If anyone else has been through this, how do you handle it?
- Date posted
- 16w ago
I’m really struggling with something related to me ocd, and I would appreciate kind and supportive advice. If you can’t relate or don’t think anything you have to say would be helpful, I kindly ask pls refrain from commenting this is a really sensitive topic for me. Recently, I’ve noticed a pattern that feels something extremely new and distressing. The first time it happened I remember telling myself before self pleasuring that I am in control no matter what thought comes into my mind because I wanted to prove to myself that these thoughts are just from OCD and I know who I am and an intrusive that came out of no where, and i suddenly felt an intense fear that I was acting on it. In the moment I genuinely felt like I did. And afterword, I panicked and started questioning myself. This SAME FEELING has happened three times in a row each time, the intrusive thought was unwanted and random, and completely against my morals most recently it involved pocd and it feels even worse because it generally felt like I acted on it the thought in the moment while I was self pleasuring the panic doesn’t hit until afterwards when I stop :/ I start thinking that maybe I generally made a mistake and I’m now just realizing that it’s wrong because it generally feels like that :( but when I actually think about it again goes against my morals and values doesn’t make sense it feels incredibly real, and I can’t seem to shake this feeling off that I may have acted on it I’m terrified because I never wanted these thoughts in the first place. And I definitely didn’t choose them. If I had known, I would’ve had these intrusive thoughts I wouldn’t have self pleasured in the first place but it’s extremely hard to convince myself that this may be OCD because I feel like I have no other reason to believe that I didn’t act on it :/
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond